So sometimes I feel left out because I don't really have any drug stories. I mean, I've done some pot, and I giggled a bit, but that's pretty much as far as it goes. As of press time my best drug story is the time I got drunk on Jaeger and spent two hours laughing at Buster's fake fireplace. That's what happens to me when I'm drunk, I think everything's an absolute hoot. In the annals of drug stories, though, it's pretty thoroughly lame.

When other folks started getting seriously about their drug habits I just started wolfing down cupcakes and now I'm a fat lame bastard who doesn't have any good stories to tell.

But yanno, no regrets. Cupcakes are grand. But I'd kind of like a story about how I blacked out one night and woke up next to a seven-foot-tall Samoan drag queen with duct tape over my nipples and a midget in a hard hat passed out in my bathroom. Or at least an excuse for why that happened. Nowadays I just have to shrug my shoulders and say "Yanno, what are you gonna do?"

Okay, so that's mostly a lie. The midget wasn't wearing a hard hat as far as I remember.

So last night I developed a nasty toothache. Yanno the ones where all you can do is clutch your mouth and howl in agony, because rational thought has left you completely? Even after knocking back an entire bottle of ibuprofen (this is exaggeration, I took one of those 800 mg horse pills) it wouldn't go away. I finally took a second early this morning, so I could at least sleep. It worked alright, but I woke up with half my face swole up like an orangutan. So I had to make an emergency visit to the dentist, where I learned I had a bad abscess. I'm all goofy on codein and antibiotics, and I'm trying to eat chicken soup, but it's mixing with the congealed blood in my tooth socket and it's just all kinds of nasty.

I require hugs.

Nobody's reading this so I'll just spew a bunch of nonsense! Won't that be fun, chillun? Sometimes, very late at night, and just for fun, I sleep. Okay, so that was a pretty stupid thing to say. Ah well. I like pie. And animal crackers. And silly plastic crap that comes out of vending machines. Especially funky monster things that make no sense at all. I'm basically a nine year old.

This blog has been a buttload of lies. Except for those bits in which I told the truth. Please exit the blog in an an orderly fashion.

So folks here is my blog entry. I don't know exactly what to say, so we'll just settle for saying hello and all that.

Behold! Francisco the Manginer. Giggle and be jazzed!

You know what, I don't care if you laugh at me or not. I like Journey and I'm not ashamed to admit it. What do you think of that, chillun?

New journal! So shiny!

Blah.

Freaking Oklahoma! It's nice and 70 degrees all week, then, for the weekend... Snow! What the hell isup wih this state?

So I'm thinking I should post in the forums more. No good being here if I'm not gonna interact, wouldn't you agree?

Anyhow, this is basically a very lazy way of trying to start conversations.

Here once again to dance for you, chillun, is the funky pirate!

Sooo, my goddamned picture doesn't wan to upload, Gah! I should really find something constructive to do.

This has been a post for the sake of posting.

Never mind, figured it out. Eh. Look, pirates!