I found this in my purse today. I vaguely recall writing it down in Chicago. Clearly very important 
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zamn:
My asshole of an electric razor thought it would be funny to bite off more then it could chew. I showed that bitch what's up after its little jackass moment. Hopefully it will think twice before messing with me that way again (raises my pimp hand while it cries like a ginger-headed stepchild in the corner).
elichrusos:
Oh no, my idea is trite and overplayed. (Also, how did I not see that? The cute little a is, in retrospect, unmistakable.)