superkitty

Here it is, more decade-old melodrama. As you'll recall, I am in the process of purging my soul for the new year. I am amazed at how good it feels. I highly recommend it.

***

you are driving me insane
the frustration is burning
bursting out of my heart
any minute now
i might have to do something drastic
i might have to call you
i went to sleep with your picture in my head
and today i woke up with you burning in my body
your touch was suddenly so real, so close
and there were tears springing to my eyes
and i thought of you while
i washed my hair and got dressed
and i thought about dancing with you
while i played music
and when i sat on my bed
i thought about kissing you
and fucking you slowly, gently
and i thought about all the time
i spent with you
and every moment that meant everything to me
i thought about how it used to be
i know where you live!
i know your number!
and i know how to come see you!
any minute!
what's stopping me from doing it...
the longing suddenly sprang to life again today
and i was thinking how it would be
if i saw you again
how would you handle it
i need to feel you
warm against me, in the dark forest
feeling your love
feeling your expression
throbbing through my veins
my blood tainted with you
my canvas painted for you
my life fated for you

***

in the crystalline night
like children without torment
into a fantasy world slipping
as if the night was tripping
walking in the cold grip of the town at rest
two children feeling their youth
slip through their fingers
like so many seeds
too late to germinate
fated to lie dormant
until the next sleep
scrambling for a spark of the once-bright flame
smoky trails of wispy air
threading behind until they reach their kingdom
with abandon
flinging themselves back
through the widening chasm
to when instant whims were as good as plans
and they revel in the joy of the lucky
and the frightened
fingering the last small hope
with melancholy hands
and as the night falls deeper and deeper
into the slumber of the dark
they begin to find exquisite comfort
not in their mission
but in each other
with tentative touches breaking down
holding the other
for dear life
tender and desperate
thawing the last remnant of hope
in the hearth of their heat
one frozen heart melts
dripping clear puddles
a beautiful flash of twinkling blue
justifies everything
stripping away the tired joyless sheen
fixing their gazes on reality
they return with reluctance
to the cardboard routines
to share the stiff-backed chair
to endure the twilight even before the dawn

***

flesh and angelic blood
burning and turning in your masculinity
i'm reeling in your warmth
taking your angles
around the world in my mind
your hollows and ridges
hot to my anxious touch
my awed gaze
unbelieving of your sweet beauty

***

[I have to edit this one to protect the innocent. Replace all masculine pronouns with the same person's name.]

clouds - thick and tight with the pain
the sky cries
over and over she cries
the sky rains him
he seeps out of every pore
she wades knee deep in him
when she steps outside
the sky cries him
but he is gone
divided into every raindrop
he drips down her face - but he is gone

***

Happy New Year everyone! Hope you all refilled your Prozac cause there's more to come...