So... I dont like boyfriends. I've given up on the whole relationSHIT thing. I have never been in a relationship for longer than 6 months... No, im not afraid of commitment... its just that right around that 5 month mark, they do something really FUCKED up.. my last boyfriend (2 years ago) decided to one day chug a half gallon of vodka and put me in a coma and the one before him stole $500 from me out of my bedroom drawer when he could have just asked for it and i dont even want to GO to what the one before that one did.. so ive stopped making everyone my frikkin boyfriend and just dated. That has worked b/c i find REALLY good guys.. they just arent good for ME. And if he isnt my boyfriend .. i dont have to break his heart. You know? Thats why you get those ppl in really fucked up relationships... they really arent good for eachother but no one wants to hurt anyones feelings.
After dating all these sweet guys and not fining the one for me.. Ive stopped looking. Ive stopped trying. thats not a bad thing AT ALL. Ive just stopped stressing myself out w/ self-pity and doubt and the "whats wrong w/ me!!!??" If i really am in need of some afection.. ill call someone up and go out on a date. Luckily.. i can do that...cause im pretty...yeah...i said it. They are all great but no one has made me feel like "HOLY HOT DAMN!!! We should be together!" Never that some-part-of-my-skin-needs-to-touch-some-part-of-yours-at-all-times feeling.
And then:
HE's wonderful!! He's amazing!! He's everything I need!! He's everything i want!! HE'S.......On the exact fucking opposite side of the planet.
Sometimes, Jesus likes to kick me in the face while i sleep, too.
No i wish you could understand!! I can feel his fingertips on my lips. I can taste the salt from his skin. I can smell his hair. We have never even been in the same hemisphere. i think about him all the time. When no one was looking, ive danced w/ him. Ive made love to him time and time again. When he speaks to me on the phone.. i can feel him smiling. He writes me and the words dance around me and tickle me and hold me tight. Some have told me he's lucky...and i have heard people say "oh im soo lucky to have you" Fuck that.. i dont feel lucky! not one bit! The way i see it.. there's just no other way. Its just the way the world works.. with me and him together. Is the sky lucky to have clouds? Is a bird lucky to have wings? Is the ocean lucky to have fish? Its just the way it is.. and i just realized that ive never felt this way before! Like, this very second i just realized that. hahahhahaha!!!
holla back!
After dating all these sweet guys and not fining the one for me.. Ive stopped looking. Ive stopped trying. thats not a bad thing AT ALL. Ive just stopped stressing myself out w/ self-pity and doubt and the "whats wrong w/ me!!!??" If i really am in need of some afection.. ill call someone up and go out on a date. Luckily.. i can do that...cause im pretty...yeah...i said it. They are all great but no one has made me feel like "HOLY HOT DAMN!!! We should be together!" Never that some-part-of-my-skin-needs-to-touch-some-part-of-yours-at-all-times feeling.
And then:
HE's wonderful!! He's amazing!! He's everything I need!! He's everything i want!! HE'S.......On the exact fucking opposite side of the planet.
Sometimes, Jesus likes to kick me in the face while i sleep, too.
No i wish you could understand!! I can feel his fingertips on my lips. I can taste the salt from his skin. I can smell his hair. We have never even been in the same hemisphere. i think about him all the time. When no one was looking, ive danced w/ him. Ive made love to him time and time again. When he speaks to me on the phone.. i can feel him smiling. He writes me and the words dance around me and tickle me and hold me tight. Some have told me he's lucky...and i have heard people say "oh im soo lucky to have you" Fuck that.. i dont feel lucky! not one bit! The way i see it.. there's just no other way. Its just the way the world works.. with me and him together. Is the sky lucky to have clouds? Is a bird lucky to have wings? Is the ocean lucky to have fish? Its just the way it is.. and i just realized that ive never felt this way before! Like, this very second i just realized that. hahahhahaha!!!
holla back!
gylrek:
lol good luck ,hope thing turn out as wonderful as you picture them in your head