something new i wrote. still has lots of problems, but i don't have much to say and i have'nt posted poetry for a while, so here goes. if you want to critique it, be as brutal as possible!!! you can't say anything worse about it than i already have!
at shattering, pan-planar light
seeing, natal
evades now recapture
keeping pace
scattering you,
at winded rest,
a trail of hazards
(not heard, unheard, crackle
sun bled on figure ground
flare remnant innocent step
in contact, aura lapse)
absent, grief humming over
false fascination
dropped-drawn
forceps grasped
flares captured
crystallized
note: i may have edited this one to death. working on taking grammar out completely. very difficult
at shattering, pan-planar light
seeing, natal
evades now recapture
keeping pace
scattering you,
at winded rest,
a trail of hazards
(not heard, unheard, crackle
sun bled on figure ground
flare remnant innocent step
in contact, aura lapse)
absent, grief humming over
false fascination
dropped-drawn
forceps grasped
flares captured
crystallized
note: i may have edited this one to death. working on taking grammar out completely. very difficult
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SUPRISE KITTEN PARTY
*noisemakers*
[Edited on Feb 12, 2005 1:35PM]
((I hope this isn't too terribly unsolicited - I almost mauled a couple people this year for reminding me of my birthday))
Take care.