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I've already thanked people privately, but I wanted to thank everyone again for their generosity in making the van break-in incident on Christmas less of a desperate "fuck, what am I going to do now, how unlucky can a person get?" sort of situation. I was able to get the most important things replaced, thankfully.

Which is good, because otherwise, honestly I'd feel a little...
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rush:
Gosh I miss you.
volkov:
Hope whereever you are, you are doing well and having grand adventures, Miss.
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So... Either Christmas eve or Christmas morning, my van (which as most of you know is also my home) was broken into. I don't keep anything terribly valuable in there unattended, but lots of miscellaneous shit was stolen that all adds up quickly when it comes to replacing it. At least they didn't smash the window (they disassembled the little triangle of window/vent thing on...
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silversurfer:
I'm sorry to hear about this turn of events. I'll be sending positive thoughts your way, with hopes of some good luck and (relative) prosperity.
lemonkid:
Whoa, holy Xmas fuckwaddery. Hope you're able to replace the things you need quickly. That really sucks about the piano tuning tools, might want to call around to see if they were pawned.
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I'm house/cat sitting for a friend for a few weeks. OMG it's nice to have a kitchen and refrigerator and an oven and outlets and fast wifi and running water and couches and bookshelves and kitties running around and a shower and a toilet and a thermostat and a patio and space and access to a laundry room. To all of you reading this that...
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platypuz:
Well i have been lucky enough to be a property owner for a year now and sometimes still cant believe it,i'll wake up in the middle of the night and realise i own the toilet and the carpet,i can paint the walls black and listern to the cure all day of i wish and i never have to fear about rent increases again so i do appreciate what i have and the hard work that went into me getting it.
volkov:
I kinda know what you mean from a different angle. When I'm traveling or on active duty in the field it's amazing when I come back in and enjoy not living in a tent eating cold prepackaged food or tromping through the woods at night for days on without a shower....primes my appreciative heart pump for friends and family too...makes the regular world in general more bearable for a while.

luxuriating in a nice hotel tonight and then off to sleep in my friend shared home tomorrow.

hoping a good rest and warm and happy hearth home these yuletide holidays!
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lemonkid:
Never forget that you are loved. And you can call me anytime.
bitterntwisted:
Some disconnected and possibly mutually contradictory thoughts:

I have been in a similar place, though it came new to me. (Perhaps it's like the habit of lying; I became good at that, when I was young. The key to it was not the remembering of my lies, so much as the believing of them. It became too much like hard work to remember them, after a while; and I'd never been happy with it.)

I think that toothpickmoe is probably right, if I've understood him. Don't ever believe you can't change yourself. I edited my sense of humour, in my late teens. I am a much nicer person for it.

I can't say what Lemonkid said; I don't know you well enough. But I do tell you that you're valued.

The cure for my depression, thirteen years ago, was be(com)ing a (single) parent. I found I had to be functional, to give my son a chance. He was four, then. I used him as a lever against myself; if he'd gone from me, I wouldn't have lived five years. He gave me a reason to function. (Some of it, for sure, was anger at my in-laws' offer to raise him; they would have tried to mould him in ways they'd failed at with their daughter.) It wasn't much of a life, for sure; but it was imperative. He's a nice kid. (Soon, he will leave home, and I will have to fight my way out of the result. Or not. I'm tired.)


From that I take two very specific lessons.

First, make sure you are getting enough sleep. That makes a big difference. I had ten years of chronic sleep deprivation; after I quit that job, it took me six months to start sleeping sensibly.

Second, you have hope, whether you know it or not; and you have joy. Arrange your life so that you have unexpected joys; that feeds hope. (For me, this involves going for walks, away from towns. Preferably very early in the morning, to see the light come across the land, and watch the day-life begin.)
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bitterntwisted:
I hope the beer was as good as the koozie smile

(Any idea on the etymology of "koozie"? Is it just a mutation of "cosy", as in "tea cosy"?)
crazycentaur:
I like that.
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crazycentaur:
That was a very cool video.

I thought they had beefed up security on trains as well.

Have fun, you are certainly out there!!!
bitterntwisted:
thank you smile
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martini:
how the hell did it take me five years to come across your blog and realize how awesome you are? seriously... i feel like an asshole.

xo
platypuz:
Damn,that water looks so pure and lovely,i sure hope you went swimming,it looks to good an oppertunity to waste.
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a few nights ago i played cello for a dying dog. i was walking back to my van after busking, and this (drunk? slightly swaying) dude standing next to his car with all the doors open strikes up a conversation with me "is that a cello? ... oh, that's amazing ... sometimes i play my ukulele for Angel. Angel's my dog ... She's got cancer...
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volkov:
smile

good adventures
crazycentaur:
That's a very nice gesture to have played for that poor dog.

Sounds like you are having some good adventures.
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so. well. let's see. my next couple months: 1) north dakota sugar beet harvest for a not-so-easy couple grand in a couple weeks span 2) north carolina with a anarchist dude from haiti that i met at rabbitstick (in Idaho) who's headed there.

maybe???

my life is wonderful and strange.

o yeah, rabbitstick, i suppose i should update about that. it's this primitive skills gathering...
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platypuz:
I know who im hanging out with when the zombie apocalypse comes. Hey what exactly do you do with the road kill,i have heard about people picking up road kill before but im not sure what they do with it (i have my suspicions) .I dont think i have heard of the practice down here.
rafi:
If you know how to make an elderberry flute and hobo stove, you're set for life.
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_margot_:
You look so alive. It is amazing.
misterasta:
damn. i want a boat-skeleton-thingy to play in now...
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i love my life.

i have a chalkboard in my van. on it, a to do list:

dmv
slingshot
powells
rabbitstick
horse chestnuts
blackberries
lock picking
food not bombs 5:30
wapato island
piano
sell junk
call taxidermists
roadkill?
solar laptop charger

also a poem by wendell berry about birds and abandoned lots.



one of the best things about living in a van is that i...
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volkov:
living out of a van is fun sometimes. an adventure most times. smile

I admire your luck in parking spaces!


platypuz:
They are indeed,the intemitidly pop up in Sydney.Im keen to help out next time they appear.
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well, i'm in portland.

it's been pretty crazy this past week. been running around trying to deal with the stuff my mom has in storage, then deal with a bunch of family drama, then try to find a van, then comparison shop for car insurance, then more family drama (including an aunt that was just diagnosed with cirrhosis because of her drinking & trying to...
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toothpickmoe:
That's a hell of a trip already.
platypuz:
This sounds like it going to be an awesome adventure,how can you go wrong with a pirate van.
We have a grindcore band here called Ornithologist who have a love of extreme metal and birds,quite a unique combination.