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wow. i'm having a difficult time with this new layout. on the front page it seemed simpler and better organized. now i've realized that it is complex and weird. or i'm on the wrong end of the learning curve confused
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cybele:
HPBD, reclusive one.

smile
pygmy:
here is my biennial plea for you to post something on SG now and again.
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down but not out!!!

To be lost, to capsize. Desire of the fall, desire which is the push and pull of the fall. And whoever falls is not one, but several. Multiple fall. Each one restrains himself, clinging to an other, an other who is himself and is the dissolution-the dispersion-of the self, and the restraint is pure haste, panicky flight, death outside death.

-Blanchot

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pygmy:
somehow fate neurosis doesn't sound so delightful.

i'm good, actually! simple as that. just good. smile
testykitten:
did you get my invite?
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it's been so long since i've updated...been recording alot, and avoiding people who have made my life confusing and sad...coping with the fact that may have suffered a mild stroke...staring out the window alot...been having nightmares...never been more miserable...tired.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
jakemarley:

avoiding people who have made my life confusing and sad



Good advice! Unfortunately, it can be very hard to turn your back on dead weight that you still happen to love, at least in my case. Better to make them turn their back on you. Now I am talking to myself.

I hope you are feeling better, or are at least fortunate enough to have lots of life insurance and an Alcor arrangement.

If you can't beat it, just think of the irony of it all and have a good laugh.

mle:
thanks for the comment on my set!

kiss
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dear...

the rainy season has emerged with a thud of gusts and deaths, and i listen to the song about john wayne gacy. i read you passages from mallarme while the floors creaked above us and the cat screamed in fear. he was lost that night. sometimes, i see his doppleganger. the black squirrel has died, the windchimes are silent from decay. the hum of...
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testykitten:
either. whatever is good or inspiring!
testykitten:
thank you! the only ones i have on that list are the de la soul albums. so lots of listening to come.
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dear...

i think i've lost you. the outline of your disappearance envelopes the darkness that enfolds it. i attempt you and your vanishingto where there is funereal silence and dust. and then sometimes you trickle into me. you trickle into me, and i stop thinking. no more exhalation. no more cessation embrace uncertain pagination dead. don't swans always seem so distant? we are...
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jonnytrrrash7:
damn, that is as bleak (but maybe in a less harsher way) than that new Sunn-O album...
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my fingernails grow at a much more rapid pace these days...
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
jeffvader:
damn right you should...punch drunk love is a masterpiece. well maybe not a masterpiece but still a great film biggrin smile
testykitten:
besito to ya
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thank you all for the birthday wishes! you guys shine a little light in these ohsodarkcorners! smile smile smile smile smile

had to work though, slow as usual. the day crawled by painfully...but, i went out to dinner with by family and then joyfully proceeded to do nothing. watched equilibriumand played phone tag with a friend. joyful day. biggrin
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koue:
changed your profile photo didn't ya? Lookin' good. Happy birthday too.
testykitten:
eh...
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dear...,
i wrote a poem for you, and tore it up, because it meant nothing. i can't write anymore, i just draw words. pictograms of the impossible. i left them everywhere; on ashes, on moth wings, on voltages, and the crushing of salt. i burned them and ate them with the day's dust. transparent ogling objects. i reached out to touch your elbow...
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VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
el_scootro:
happy birthday.
cybele:
Joyeux Anniversaire, philosphe!!!

Live it up, Lams!!

smile
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things to do in lew of watching films:

-cry about how difficult it is to interact with the real world.
-write in your journal about it in order to guilt-trip the friend who put you up to it after you die.
-write melodramatic essays about it for the same purpose
-go to art shows and museums and be astounded when the pictures don't move...
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l_f:
You forgot:
- Masturbate! shocked

wink

On a more serious note: The on-line world is part of the real world. I find rather harder to interact here without people's expressions, voices, voice tones, qi, etc. etc.

It sounds like you are planning the small and big things in your life too much - That takes away most of the time for living (Am I in the right track? confused )
testykitten:
yeah- i need to make that list. things to do while unemployed instead of noodling around on the internet. actually going outside would help.