The Keyser Sze Bull
I got an email yesterday from a buddy of mine from the Bay Area. He and I had trained together briefly a few years back at the Evolving Body Mind Kung Fu Academy; I only took a handful of classes, but he was a dedicated San Shou student for a while there, and even got some San Shou fights. Prior to the San Shou, he studied traditional Shaolin Kung Fu for several years.
One of the things that drew him to San Shou was this creeping realization that the old-style techniques just didn't work anymore. He'd decided to try his hand with some sparring and was finding the things he'd been told about his techniques weren't true. So he switched schools.
The other day he ran into a guy from his old school. This guy is a bit of a blowhard, kind of a dick, and loves to talk kung-fu shit. So he's going on about, "oh, see, when you punch, then I grab your wrist, and then I can . . ."
Anyone who's ever had to hang around martial arts nerds knows how this conversation goes.
Finally my buddy says, "I don't believe that will work. Show me."
He puts on some gloves and lets the dude try to get any of his grabbing techniques off against a punch. Dude doesn't even get close.
After all that blahblahblah, his techniques just don't work. They probably worked a hundred years ago when everybody fighting in China left their punches out there instead of re-chambering them, but they sure don't work against anyone striking with a modern style.
In the end, if you want to learn how to fight, you have to train with a fighter. Most mixed marital arts guys couldnt teach you how to do acrobatics for the movies, and most of those movie guys couldnt help you win a no-holds barred fight. You can only teach what you know . . .
One kung-fu guy told me (and this is no joke) that if I trained with him I'd never be allowed to train with any one else for the rest of my life, because his kung-fu secrets were so unique and powerful that I might accidentally pass them on to someone else if they were even allowed to watch me train. His kung-fu secrets were so powerful (he assured me) that he could make even a very average boxer a world champion, if he wanted to.
Fortunately for Roy Jones Junior, he didn't want to, because boxing wasn't very spiritual.
I can't make this shit up.
So my buddy did a great job of calling out the blowhard and delivering a soft and kind object lesson (as opposed to the one that your average pissed-off drunk tough guy might deliver regarding the uselessness of the techniques the blowhard had spent the last 15 years studying). If he's a smart blowhard, and I kind of doubt it, he'll either go study with a school where they actually teach you to fight, or just shut up about how bad ass his kung-fu is. Really, either of those options would be fine. There's nothing wrong with practicing techniques that aren't meant for fighting; just don't lie to yourself is all I'm saying.
Most likely, though, his belief that he is a secret bad ass walking among defensless mortals is strong enough that he'll just rationalize the whole lesson away by the time you finish reading this journal. Why? Because a guy like that is playing the bluff, rather than playing from strength.
Another friend of mine (another fighter) just sent me an email mentioning that hed read that some anthropologists were theorizing that bluffing is better than actual strength when it comes to reproductive success. As he put it, while the strong bulls are fucking each other up, the Keyser Sze bulls are sneaking around fucking the cows.
So theres some biological precedent for the shit-talking know-it-all who cant back it up, but its still nice to see him bump gently up against reality from time to time.
There is a lesson to the wise, here; don't neglect to field-test your beliefs, or at the very least learn which audiences will call your bluff.
I got an email yesterday from a buddy of mine from the Bay Area. He and I had trained together briefly a few years back at the Evolving Body Mind Kung Fu Academy; I only took a handful of classes, but he was a dedicated San Shou student for a while there, and even got some San Shou fights. Prior to the San Shou, he studied traditional Shaolin Kung Fu for several years.
One of the things that drew him to San Shou was this creeping realization that the old-style techniques just didn't work anymore. He'd decided to try his hand with some sparring and was finding the things he'd been told about his techniques weren't true. So he switched schools.
The other day he ran into a guy from his old school. This guy is a bit of a blowhard, kind of a dick, and loves to talk kung-fu shit. So he's going on about, "oh, see, when you punch, then I grab your wrist, and then I can . . ."
Anyone who's ever had to hang around martial arts nerds knows how this conversation goes.
Finally my buddy says, "I don't believe that will work. Show me."
He puts on some gloves and lets the dude try to get any of his grabbing techniques off against a punch. Dude doesn't even get close.
After all that blahblahblah, his techniques just don't work. They probably worked a hundred years ago when everybody fighting in China left their punches out there instead of re-chambering them, but they sure don't work against anyone striking with a modern style.
In the end, if you want to learn how to fight, you have to train with a fighter. Most mixed marital arts guys couldnt teach you how to do acrobatics for the movies, and most of those movie guys couldnt help you win a no-holds barred fight. You can only teach what you know . . .
One kung-fu guy told me (and this is no joke) that if I trained with him I'd never be allowed to train with any one else for the rest of my life, because his kung-fu secrets were so unique and powerful that I might accidentally pass them on to someone else if they were even allowed to watch me train. His kung-fu secrets were so powerful (he assured me) that he could make even a very average boxer a world champion, if he wanted to.
Fortunately for Roy Jones Junior, he didn't want to, because boxing wasn't very spiritual.
I can't make this shit up.
So my buddy did a great job of calling out the blowhard and delivering a soft and kind object lesson (as opposed to the one that your average pissed-off drunk tough guy might deliver regarding the uselessness of the techniques the blowhard had spent the last 15 years studying). If he's a smart blowhard, and I kind of doubt it, he'll either go study with a school where they actually teach you to fight, or just shut up about how bad ass his kung-fu is. Really, either of those options would be fine. There's nothing wrong with practicing techniques that aren't meant for fighting; just don't lie to yourself is all I'm saying.
Most likely, though, his belief that he is a secret bad ass walking among defensless mortals is strong enough that he'll just rationalize the whole lesson away by the time you finish reading this journal. Why? Because a guy like that is playing the bluff, rather than playing from strength.
Another friend of mine (another fighter) just sent me an email mentioning that hed read that some anthropologists were theorizing that bluffing is better than actual strength when it comes to reproductive success. As he put it, while the strong bulls are fucking each other up, the Keyser Sze bulls are sneaking around fucking the cows.
So theres some biological precedent for the shit-talking know-it-all who cant back it up, but its still nice to see him bump gently up against reality from time to time.
There is a lesson to the wise, here; don't neglect to field-test your beliefs, or at the very least learn which audiences will call your bluff.
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I also like the shirt that I was wearing in that photo. Of course, this would be obvious, since I bought it, but I do like it more than most.
I've found that I'm a helluva good martial artist if I have either an imaginary foe, or I can position them any way I like.