In the middle of the air, feeling a breeze blowing into the tightly knit cloth that surrounds my legs and arms at zero gravity on the furthest point of free flight before gravity takes over again and the reality sets back in. Seeing the city for what it is, a smog filled canopy over casting a bleek, unearthed monster. Seeing first hand what has been eating away at the flesh of life. I give away my... wrists to the city so it may place it's forceable vengence on my innocence in this altercation. My efforts seem useless in a struggle with myself. As I close my eyes in this moment of pause, this split second to re-think my actions prior, now realizing that it was a bad idea. My actions cannot be rewritten, cannot be corrected because there is only one life you are given. The struggle that my brain is now having with my body to just give in to it's unpredictability, is gone un-sung. It is too late, as the motion starts to pick up pace, I begin to count my blessings, although blessings are not what they seem, just like this moment is sureal. The time spent in the middle of the air is running low, like my last breaths, as I try to make peace with anything that would have me. I try to remember if I fixed everything that I wronged, making sure if what is unknown becomes true, that I will not have to deal with the consequences. It is too late, whoever is below should be weary of the air above, for within seconds, it will shift into a weight pressing against the earth. With a crumbled piece of paper, stating the reasons behind my decision, a cry for help, as I stare at the inevitable. Car lights seem to become more frequent, more eradic, or maybe that is my adrenaline at this moment, seeping through my pores with persistance. I hope my heart has found the love it wanted, my brain the education, my body the escape it desired, for this is my last testiment, before all is lost in what first was loneliness, then desperation, then action. Farewell to .............
.
.