ambrose03

I have been accused of being to negitive. That is true, I am. I have tried to find someway of dealing with my pain, in either a healthly or unhealthly fasion. I don't drink, never really liked drugs, I can't ever seem to get a hold of friends when I need to talk, and no one ever returns my messages. The only thing I have...
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I should just admit I failed. Sell the house and roll the dice on my future.

god I wish I had someone to talk to sometimes

uh...yeah...thats all for now

New Year....new attempts?

attempt to finish my story....

attempt to feel happy...

attempt to be happy with someone else...

attempt to be finacialy secure...

attempt to bring myself back into the family...

attempt to fix all problems that come my way...

attempt to be there for my friends...

attempt to save the people I love from pain...

attempt to not lose my soul attemting...

So I took my dog to the vet for her yearly checkup...While sitting in the room talking to the vet I noticed a lump on the bottom of Kes' tounge...the vet looked at it, after much resistence on Kes' part lol, and decided that it should be removed. So I have to drop her off in the morning....and pick her up in the afternoon. wait...
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WAR
I cried inside as the world passed by,
I felt their pain and watched them die.
I died inside as the world gave in,
I knelt in the rain - accepted sin.

My hands were stained with innocent blood,
the time had come - we knew it would.
Religious icons face down in dust,
a mockery of the God we trust.

The air was...
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it seems I did figure something out. We chatted she seems to be ok at the moment. She is getting help and that is good...she called mushy, not sure if thats good lol

so I got a random IM from a friend I haven't talked to in a while....she told m that she tried to kill herself.....wow I so don't know what to do with that info....hopefuly I will figure out something by the time she calls me back

three updates in two days....thats a record for me, well maybe not quite, but close....



I've come to a realization today about the type of friend I am. For guys I'm pretty close to the typical guy buddy...just abit geekier then most. For girls...well appernelty I'm not the kind that you just randomly chat with. Meaning I'm not a casual friend I guess. Let me...
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What is your poltiical party?

according to this I'm a split between Facicism and a Democrat.

so I've been listening to christmas music on the radio and paying attention to the lyrics of some of these songs. Like in the song "Most Wonderful Time of the Year" there is the line ...and scary ghost stories....beisdes the Christmas Carol I can't think of another ghost story dealing with christmas. My favorite though is Rudolph the Red Nose Raindeer. The lyrics in there...
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