One of my side writing jobs is projecting astrological messages from the future. Keep in mind that all these predictions, while totally screamed to me by distant planets inhabited by violent space criminals, are not to be used for evil.
Also, if you're lucky enough to be a member of our totally fucking rad SGPDX group, enjoy these hot Anti-Valentines Photos.
Scorpio: (Oct. 24...
Read More
Also, if you're lucky enough to be a member of our totally fucking rad SGPDX group, enjoy these hot Anti-Valentines Photos.
Scorpio: (Oct. 24...
Read More
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
azura:
T or A game, my journal, tomorrow, win a prize! 
commie:
sean, new vampire pic is up.
Since we all got out of it alive and mostly topless by the end of the house party, and since none of us lost limbs to the walking terror of Chuck E. Cheese, I'd say this weekend's party was a triumph of rad. There were a few incidents where anonymous children would enter the curtained off secret Chuck E. area never to return, but seriously,...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
jarmitage:
Any time to you want to paint the town red and then kick the shit out of it............count me in. Had a blast last night. Drink on!!!!! my Irish friend.
alyssum:
Thanks, it was a very special day too, not every day old men in ape suits come to sing me "Hello My Baby"! I gotta put up the pic of me and Diablo7y sandwiching Ron Jeremy one of these days.
I hope I didn't abuse you last night!
Blame it on the flying poontang! 
I gotta put up the pic of me and Diablo7y sandwiching Ron Jeremy one of these days.
I hope I didn't abuse you last night!
Blame it on the flying poontang! I cannot recommend Hulk Hogan's autobiography enough. I read it the other morning instead of working on this week's articles and he tells the most awesome stories about Andre the Giant. He once drank 108 beers in 50 minutes. One hundred and fucking eight, brother! There's also a story about how Andre couldn't fit on the hotel toilet, or in the hotel bathtub, so he...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
ilovemikehunt:
if you're the guy in the picture, you fucking rock...shit, if you're one of the girls in the picutre...you fucking rock.
hatefulerin:
check out the super cute pictures of us chicoboprincess posted in the sgpdx group. we are too cute and too rad!
I'm back from the bay area, and I think I invented an incredible new system for avoiding hangovers-- never stop drinking. My editors at The Wave and Electronic Gaming Monthly threw at least one party every day for five days, They took me backstage at The Screaming Udders and fed me that insanely good Kobe beef from cows that only eat beer and spend every...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
hatefulerin:
old white people rapping is pretty rad.
this weekend will be lots of fun. you'll get to hear me complain about my snatch hurting.
bri said there's a party going on saturday night, post-concert, with free alcohol. the people there will probably be lame, but bri and i bring cool with us.
this weekend will be lots of fun. you'll get to hear me complain about my snatch hurting.
bri said there's a party going on saturday night, post-concert, with free alcohol. the people there will probably be lame, but bri and i bring cool with us.
anonymouse:
I think those cows were massaged by Beer Chan.
I'm off to San Francisco in about 12 hours. I'm partying with the guys from The Wave, slaughtering the EGM editors in Halo, and hopefully spending the rest of the time playing with Dia.
Meanwhile, I still have to review the Playstation version of The Amazing Virtual Sea-Monkeys. And if you're reading this, Satan, good work on the Playstation version of the Amazing Virtual Sea-Monkeys.
Meanwhile, I still have to review the Playstation version of The Amazing Virtual Sea-Monkeys. And if you're reading this, Satan, good work on the Playstation version of the Amazing Virtual Sea-Monkeys.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
sidspencer:
wow. you're practically the white black elvis.
butterfly2:
I wish you were coming to play with me too dammit! 
Hope the trip went well!
Hope the trip went well!
Rocco's Part III was a lot like Rocky Part 3. We started out by fighting Thunderlips, the Ultimate Male, for charity and ended up avenging the death of Burgess Meredith in a comeback match against Mr. T. Then, like Rocky, we went to a hippie compound for a garage party. Stewd and I scoured every one of the many tiny hippie houses in the area...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
corvus_pdx:
me and some buddies are getting together friday at sunset lanes
their phone # is 503-646-1116
We wanted to meet at 11:pm
and bowl until 2:00 am.
Blacklight, Cosmic bowling.
Although I don't know if they'll have beer.
PS. Anyone else reading this is more than welcome to come.
***Edited cause I can't even stick out my tounge right.
[Edited on Jan 15, 2003]
their phone # is 503-646-1116
We wanted to meet at 11:pm
and bowl until 2:00 am.
Blacklight, Cosmic bowling.
Although I don't know if they'll have beer.
PS. Anyone else reading this is more than welcome to come.
***Edited cause I can't even stick out my tounge right.
[Edited on Jan 15, 2003]
seanbaby:
It's my boiling gamma-fueled rage that makes me look like the Hulk.
I'm back from New Years. My college pals and I pick a random city every year to celebrate it in, and this year was Salt Lake. We saw the travelling Jackass tour, a lot of Mormon statues, and the friendly SLC police were nice enough to escort us to every single thing we did after 11 pm. One night we bought breakfast for this drunk...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
mistersatan:
Goddamn, you're a handsome bitch- I just stopped by the shop.
Now what's a brotha gotta do to get his ass a modelin' contract around here? *suck suck suck*
Now what's a brotha gotta do to get his ass a modelin' contract around here? *suck suck suck*
hatefulerin:
josh (i think it was josh at least) took pictures of us! he stole our luck!!
SPACEWHORES!!!!!!!!!
always a blast, my friend.
SPACEWHORES!!!!!!!!!
always a blast, my friend.
The Portland gift exchange changed the way a lot of us thought about erotic storytelling and the giant lesbian asses that surround it. MisterSatan's narration of Big Butts Monthly told the ham-scented tale of a passionate same-sex relationship between two beast monsters that both aroused our loins and could, between panties banditing, knock a jetliner out of the sky with a giant unstoppable pork hand....
Read More
Read More
VIEW 19 of 19 COMMENTS
josh:
Happy New Years!
lid0x:
Did you order a Colt 45 at the bar? If not, shame on you. Billy Dee Williams would be quite disappointed if that were the case.
The cockblasting motherfucking future is here. Yesterday I got a porn email with the subject, "Insane g!rls blowing elephants." Inside it were only the words, "Crazy men enforce to e-jaculate horses" And I said what you're probably thinking, "FINALLY!"
A friend of mine got one just before that that said, "Our hypersexsual chicks won't let you feel boring!" It didn't prophecize the coming of a...
Read More
A friend of mine got one just before that that said, "Our hypersexsual chicks won't let you feel boring!" It didn't prophecize the coming of a...
Read More
VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
demigauge:
I HAVE YOUR JELLY BEANS!!!!MUWAHAHAHA
gil:
hey freak, whats this i hear about you being in my neck o'the woods for new years???
After careful inspection of my neck, arms, and hands, there are a total of 11 places where Genesis' teeth broke through my skin. I don't know what the symptoms of rabies are, but I spent this morning spouting foam out of my mouth and being restrained by local police. And what they say is true-- they're the real heroes.
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
agentaeon:
FUCKSHIT!
FUCK SHIT!
COCK BLAST STUPID SHIT HOLE!!
FUCK SHIT!
COCK BLAST STUPID SHIT HOLE!!
seanbaby:
Ha ha ha ha... I love when the word blast comes after cock. In fact, I wrote a movie with my friend JL called Cockblaster. It's about a guy named Cockblaster.
Today's work:
Video game reviews of Barbie Secret Agent, WWE Road to Wrestlemania X8, Revenge of the Smurfs, and Army Men Turf Wars. I hyperbolized about ass-eating acid and necrophilia in my own private war against the Electronic Gaming Monthly censors, and I'm sure by the time it gets to print, their editors will hack it down to say, "Revenge of the Smurfs is a...
Read More
Video game reviews of Barbie Secret Agent, WWE Road to Wrestlemania X8, Revenge of the Smurfs, and Army Men Turf Wars. I hyperbolized about ass-eating acid and necrophilia in my own private war against the Electronic Gaming Monthly censors, and I'm sure by the time it gets to print, their editors will hack it down to say, "Revenge of the Smurfs is a...
Read More
VIEW 19 of 19 COMMENTS
ragingwhore42:
i'm gonna get you sucka! nice phone call by the way-i had way too much fun in the hot tub.
your n-word
werd
your n-word
werd
ragingwhore42:
tonight is apparently simpsons night at stewd's house-come if you can-so i can beat you up!!!
The PDX Suicide Girls party got a little interrupted by Fruitastic Dracula, his "hetero-life-partner" Ass Fucker of the Night, and that lesbian girl who was excited to tell us about how high she was on cough syrup. I am a professional drinker, so even after six pitchers of Pabst I remember most of the night, meaning that I'm fully aware that it was mostly me...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 19 of 19 COMMENTS
jayden:
yes.
ragingwhore42:
i'm sure you've probably seen this-but here ya go just in case:
http://www.highlyillogical.org/mrtgoesforadrive/
http://www.highlyillogical.org/mrtgoesforadrive/