So I am supposed to be dealing for a Texas Hold 'Em game this friday. Anxious to se how that turns out.
Well I have certainly missed most of you. Will try to be on more. I am with lots to talk about. just need to make time to do it.
Happy birthday to my older sister, Drucilla, on the 29th, girl turned 27, making me feel old, even though she is older.
So I finally got the news that my father does not have Leukemia, only to be followed by the news that my grandfather just died from Leukemia this morning. What are the odds?? Yeah, I am not into math enough to attempt figuring them out.
So I finally got the news that my father does not have Leukemia, only to be followed by the news that my grandfather just died from Leukemia this morning. What are the odds?? Yeah, I am not into math enough to attempt figuring them out.
Happy 24th birthday to my younger sister, Brittney.
So to wrap up 2009 I will be, probably doing nothing as this seems to be my way. Seems so much to be my way that i have let the last decade and 25 years of my life be a stretch of misery that I could have probably done in prison and felt happier about.
The entirety of my legal working career, or definite lack there of, has been a series of jobs that have only added to my monotony and misery, boredom and bitchiness. I think a lot, much more than I would like at times, especially when I need to sleep for the first time in a week or so. During the course of cognition of I have up with so many ideas of what I could do and it always ends up with the same result, I am unhappy. Well apart from a complete submersion into crime and all of that stuff that makes life difficult for people facing interrogation about their line of work, I have not found a better way to go about making a living.
I have spent years trying to figure out what to do with my life. With my over-analysis and reanalysis, I have done a great job at developing a glacial pace at which I go about getting into things. This has affected all aspects of my life, as these things tend to do. Some relationships have failed and not happened because of it. Job opportunities missed. Travel and vacation chances blew by because I just do not pull the trigger in some situations.
I never knew what I wanted to do in High School, not even in college. My work ethic and motivation to work hard or even really work for money was ruined at an early age by my ability to play pool well and my connections with professional gamblers. I learned at a very early age that "Money won is twice as sweet as money earned" -Fast Eddie Felson/ Paul Newman. I do not gamble so much anymore, for many reasons, abilities wane over time, mine do at least.
I went to college, my mother told me to just try to Nursing program, they pay well. Without any other idea of what I wanted to do, I agreed. Ran out of money and financial aid was a joke. Did not finish. Left college and went to the plants. Made some money but never enough. Decided that I wanted to try out Mortuary Science. Never got anywhere with it. Still cannot afford it. Worked and worked and went to school. Went back to work then school for a certification that I have not done anything with as the job market is not with the need. Still working. Still unhappy.
Before moving on, this is a quick run down of where I sit in 2009.
25 years old
Single
Still living with mother. Note: "still" as I have never moved out
Dead end job, my employment ends when the job finishes, months away at best.
Very limited number of real friends, most are acquaintances that hang about while they can use me for something.
I owe the iRS money, as they are greedy cunts
Nothing really going on or well for me
So so SO!! Recently I was thinking about how much I fucking hate working for companies only to make money for them. I work for contractors that charge $40 an hour for me but only pay me $10 or 14, and have a problem giving me a raise because of how much it cuts into the profit pad of that $40/hr. So with several years of industrial and construction experience and knowledge, an interest in Mortuary Science and a tolerance for stenches and the odors of decay, what manner of madness can I conjure up can call an ingenious idea?? I am starting a Crime, Trauma and Accident Scene Decontamination company. I have found a couple people to work for me that have incredibly helpful connections. I am moving to another city that has a better market for my services. I have the whole thing planned out. If this does not work, maybe mom will let me come back. If not, my sister is finishing up her military career and wants me to live with her while she is in college, I can work and pay the rent while she gets some schoolin' in.
Regardless of what happens, if I am still in the same situation list above, except a year or so older, I give my permission to the SG community to take me to the town center and stone me to death, maybe you will get better crops out of it.
So I would much prefer that everyone have safe celebrations of the New Year and all of that jazz that goes with it. And let us all severely improve our lives and situations in the new year and decade.
Cheers to 2010, Welcome! To my people, alla nosta salute!
If anyone wants to drunk dial or text or gets bored 361-655-2223
So to wrap up 2009 I will be, probably doing nothing as this seems to be my way. Seems so much to be my way that i have let the last decade and 25 years of my life be a stretch of misery that I could have probably done in prison and felt happier about.
The entirety of my legal working career, or definite lack there of, has been a series of jobs that have only added to my monotony and misery, boredom and bitchiness. I think a lot, much more than I would like at times, especially when I need to sleep for the first time in a week or so. During the course of cognition of I have up with so many ideas of what I could do and it always ends up with the same result, I am unhappy. Well apart from a complete submersion into crime and all of that stuff that makes life difficult for people facing interrogation about their line of work, I have not found a better way to go about making a living.
I have spent years trying to figure out what to do with my life. With my over-analysis and reanalysis, I have done a great job at developing a glacial pace at which I go about getting into things. This has affected all aspects of my life, as these things tend to do. Some relationships have failed and not happened because of it. Job opportunities missed. Travel and vacation chances blew by because I just do not pull the trigger in some situations.
I never knew what I wanted to do in High School, not even in college. My work ethic and motivation to work hard or even really work for money was ruined at an early age by my ability to play pool well and my connections with professional gamblers. I learned at a very early age that "Money won is twice as sweet as money earned" -Fast Eddie Felson/ Paul Newman. I do not gamble so much anymore, for many reasons, abilities wane over time, mine do at least.
I went to college, my mother told me to just try to Nursing program, they pay well. Without any other idea of what I wanted to do, I agreed. Ran out of money and financial aid was a joke. Did not finish. Left college and went to the plants. Made some money but never enough. Decided that I wanted to try out Mortuary Science. Never got anywhere with it. Still cannot afford it. Worked and worked and went to school. Went back to work then school for a certification that I have not done anything with as the job market is not with the need. Still working. Still unhappy.
Before moving on, this is a quick run down of where I sit in 2009.
25 years old
Single
Still living with mother. Note: "still" as I have never moved out
Dead end job, my employment ends when the job finishes, months away at best.
Very limited number of real friends, most are acquaintances that hang about while they can use me for something.
I owe the iRS money, as they are greedy cunts
Nothing really going on or well for me
So so SO!! Recently I was thinking about how much I fucking hate working for companies only to make money for them. I work for contractors that charge $40 an hour for me but only pay me $10 or 14, and have a problem giving me a raise because of how much it cuts into the profit pad of that $40/hr. So with several years of industrial and construction experience and knowledge, an interest in Mortuary Science and a tolerance for stenches and the odors of decay, what manner of madness can I conjure up can call an ingenious idea?? I am starting a Crime, Trauma and Accident Scene Decontamination company. I have found a couple people to work for me that have incredibly helpful connections. I am moving to another city that has a better market for my services. I have the whole thing planned out. If this does not work, maybe mom will let me come back. If not, my sister is finishing up her military career and wants me to live with her while she is in college, I can work and pay the rent while she gets some schoolin' in.
Regardless of what happens, if I am still in the same situation list above, except a year or so older, I give my permission to the SG community to take me to the town center and stone me to death, maybe you will get better crops out of it.
So I would much prefer that everyone have safe celebrations of the New Year and all of that jazz that goes with it. And let us all severely improve our lives and situations in the new year and decade.
Cheers to 2010, Welcome! To my people, alla nosta salute!
If anyone wants to drunk dial or text or gets bored 361-655-2223
Over a week into December and I am finally getting around to updating for everyone that I cannot imagine reads this shit here.
So my sister has visited and returned to Germany to serve the remainder of her time in the military. She has finally after something like 9 years said that I can go with her. We are supposed to try to buy a house some time after april when she wraps up her service. Naturally I make no real plans as they never work out. So the novelty of the dome shaped house has run its course and she is now looking for a big place to have parties at or what the fuck ever. I do not party, I just need room for a pool table and a place to hang my SG prints and such.
I am still waiting on a better job. Got 3 companies that I am waiting on. And I have been giving much consideration to starting a business. A legitimate one, so unlike gambling and the other stuff I do, the IRS will be getting a cut, tragic it really is as I still owe them several thousand dollars. (Never claim a stripper's children, even with her permission, nothing against strippers, sounds much funnier when said that way instead of someone else's kids.)
Work lately has been all FITA, that is fucked in the ass, for the reasons that the weather is preventing us from working and the holidays are fucking preventing us from working. I asked to work Thanksgiving and Christmas as I am without a use for either holiday, my request was declined and my sanity again questioned. Apparently crazy people are the only people unhappy enough to want to work holidays, according to my bosses at least.
So that covered my sister's visit, plans, work that covers it.
Fuck, wait then. You can keep reading.
Well I was talking to a girl, this never happens, and it was going well, this rarely happens, apparently she is no longer with interest in me, this always happens. So that is quite disappointing, she is quite lovely I think. One might expect to hear me say that I do not know why I waste my time. But I actually do know why I waste my time. This is apart from being without another better thing to do with my time, of course. It is because I am not female. I should've been born a girl. I would be happy. Or at least I would not have to try to find girls to dress up in everything that I cannot wear. I have had a few that did, but none that would let me dress them up however I wanted. Fucking hell, I am a fucking weirdo, it is okay to fucking shoot me.
Or you can shoot me a message at 361-655-2223.
So my sister has visited and returned to Germany to serve the remainder of her time in the military. She has finally after something like 9 years said that I can go with her. We are supposed to try to buy a house some time after april when she wraps up her service. Naturally I make no real plans as they never work out. So the novelty of the dome shaped house has run its course and she is now looking for a big place to have parties at or what the fuck ever. I do not party, I just need room for a pool table and a place to hang my SG prints and such.
I am still waiting on a better job. Got 3 companies that I am waiting on. And I have been giving much consideration to starting a business. A legitimate one, so unlike gambling and the other stuff I do, the IRS will be getting a cut, tragic it really is as I still owe them several thousand dollars. (Never claim a stripper's children, even with her permission, nothing against strippers, sounds much funnier when said that way instead of someone else's kids.)
Work lately has been all FITA, that is fucked in the ass, for the reasons that the weather is preventing us from working and the holidays are fucking preventing us from working. I asked to work Thanksgiving and Christmas as I am without a use for either holiday, my request was declined and my sanity again questioned. Apparently crazy people are the only people unhappy enough to want to work holidays, according to my bosses at least.
So that covered my sister's visit, plans, work that covers it.
Fuck, wait then. You can keep reading.
Well I was talking to a girl, this never happens, and it was going well, this rarely happens, apparently she is no longer with interest in me, this always happens. So that is quite disappointing, she is quite lovely I think. One might expect to hear me say that I do not know why I waste my time. But I actually do know why I waste my time. This is apart from being without another better thing to do with my time, of course. It is because I am not female. I should've been born a girl. I would be happy. Or at least I would not have to try to find girls to dress up in everything that I cannot wear. I have had a few that did, but none that would let me dress them up however I wanted. Fucking hell, I am a fucking weirdo, it is okay to fucking shoot me.
Or you can shoot me a message at 361-655-2223.
I have been doing an almost total shit job at updating this, partially because my internet sucks. And I need to buy a new camera, don't know which to go with. And I need to buy a new gun and a new pool cue and a new car. HAHA and I make no where near enough money for any of this shit! I am waiting on a new job that I have lined up in the middle of January. My job is dependant on the company getting another job.
So my sister wants to buy some hideous dome shaped house and she wants me to be her roomie. So all of this means I cannot fuck around about my jobs anymore. I have to keep one and be even more responsible. Gamble more and sell more- yeah so I have to figure out what to do. I don't even know how long I have to get my shit together as she is coming home today from Germany on a leave and is going to be out of the military in april. No one tells me anything until it is too late, so I get stuck with extra stress because of their lack of planning.
This seems like a place for a paragraph break. So this whole house thing has me uncertain for the reasons that: the place is hideous.
It is 20 miles out of my town and away from my routine and job and all of that jazz. I have not seen the inside of the house, only a small printed out picture of the outside of it. My mother and other sister went and saw the place and claim its big inside, 4 bedrooms 3 bathrooms and some other stuff. So I can probably get a pool table in somewhere. I would much prefer a 9 or 10 foot table. But I don't know what the place will accomodate or if she will even get the place at all. For now I make no plans as my plans always seem to fail.
I am certain that my negativity and unwillingness to change is still making things more difficult for me. But I am stubborn and would like to think that I am too smart to break my rules and allow myself to set myself up for more disappointment. But it seems that there is a good chance that I am just too stupid to enable myself to be happy and stop being so bitter. I have been letting go of a lot of things lately and I feel a touch better for it. But positivity just does not appeal to me. So I stick with my ridiculous logic of: Prepare for the worst, prefer the best and hope for nothing.
As much as I would prefer to contine whining and what not I have to get a few more things finished before going to the airport to pick up my sister.
Call or text 361-655-2223
So my sister wants to buy some hideous dome shaped house and she wants me to be her roomie. So all of this means I cannot fuck around about my jobs anymore. I have to keep one and be even more responsible. Gamble more and sell more- yeah so I have to figure out what to do. I don't even know how long I have to get my shit together as she is coming home today from Germany on a leave and is going to be out of the military in april. No one tells me anything until it is too late, so I get stuck with extra stress because of their lack of planning.
This seems like a place for a paragraph break. So this whole house thing has me uncertain for the reasons that: the place is hideous.
It is 20 miles out of my town and away from my routine and job and all of that jazz. I have not seen the inside of the house, only a small printed out picture of the outside of it. My mother and other sister went and saw the place and claim its big inside, 4 bedrooms 3 bathrooms and some other stuff. So I can probably get a pool table in somewhere. I would much prefer a 9 or 10 foot table. But I don't know what the place will accomodate or if she will even get the place at all. For now I make no plans as my plans always seem to fail.
I am certain that my negativity and unwillingness to change is still making things more difficult for me. But I am stubborn and would like to think that I am too smart to break my rules and allow myself to set myself up for more disappointment. But it seems that there is a good chance that I am just too stupid to enable myself to be happy and stop being so bitter. I have been letting go of a lot of things lately and I feel a touch better for it. But positivity just does not appeal to me. So I stick with my ridiculous logic of: Prepare for the worst, prefer the best and hope for nothing.
As much as I would prefer to contine whining and what not I have to get a few more things finished before going to the airport to pick up my sister.
Call or text 361-655-2223
On the way home from work today the clouds were amazing. I was driving over the bridge connecting my town and the one I work in. The water was so fucking incredible. I am rarely at the beach anymore and seem to forget that I live in a city on the coast. This part of Texs does not have the most popular or even better beaches but they are still quite lovely. Even with loud waves and wind it is peaceful. I do not appreciate the beauty of the water, but seeing it today was just brilliant. The clouds reflection on the water was textured by the waves. Everything looked cool and soft, deep and pale blues, whites and grays. It made me want to get some red in the water.
So I realized last night that I should probably not talk with children so much, because I do not like to change the manner in which I speak to suit what their intelligence level may be. Or their maturity level either. This all cost me $2. This is what happened.
At the bowling alley, looking pretty, hanging out, hating everything. A child approachs me as I am sitting reshaping the tip of my pool cue.
HI BRIAN!!!
Hello Ashley.
Want a hug?
I will be having none of that.
What is that on your shirt? Is it a band?
No its Suicide Girls.
What are those?
They are the most beautiful girls in the world, what else would they be?
Um, I don't know, a band?
No child it is not a band.
Is your girlfriend a Suicide Girl?
Ashley when is the last time you have seen me around a girl that is not already with someone else?
Never?
Yeah pretty close.
Well are you going to get a Suicide Girl for a girlfriend?
That probably couldn't even happen in my dreams dude.
Oh oh! Dreams come true!! Mine will!!
I am happ- No actually I am way to fucking bitter to be happy for you, because Unfortunately, mine will not be so courteous.
What does that mean?
That my dreams will not come true.
But dreams do come true.
Hey dude, you are like 6 right? That means you have not yet realized how shitty life is for some people. For some of us, things never work out how we want them to. Life is a big disappointment and a hard fucking. For others, life is good. -At this point I stop and think, I really should not be telling this girl this shit now, because I have to hear the parents bullshit when she repeats it.-
Ashley, forget everything I just told you, go enjoy childhood, its supposed to be the easy part of life.
But...
Look dude here is a fucking dollar, go buy some candy.
THANKS BRIAN!!
Hang on, what were we talking about?
Candy?
That's good, here is another dollar, get some soda while you are up there.
Well I do not want to repeat the last part of my last blog exactly so now we have...
Well yeah, So then I am on myspace and facebook a lot more than I am on here because my phone is quite cunty and will not load this site so easily. Add me on there, Brian Quintanilla, tastycorpse666@yahoo.com. Or text your obscenities to 3616552223.
So I realized last night that I should probably not talk with children so much, because I do not like to change the manner in which I speak to suit what their intelligence level may be. Or their maturity level either. This all cost me $2. This is what happened.
At the bowling alley, looking pretty, hanging out, hating everything. A child approachs me as I am sitting reshaping the tip of my pool cue.
HI BRIAN!!!
Hello Ashley.
Want a hug?
I will be having none of that.
What is that on your shirt? Is it a band?
No its Suicide Girls.
What are those?
They are the most beautiful girls in the world, what else would they be?
Um, I don't know, a band?
No child it is not a band.
Is your girlfriend a Suicide Girl?
Ashley when is the last time you have seen me around a girl that is not already with someone else?
Never?
Yeah pretty close.
Well are you going to get a Suicide Girl for a girlfriend?
That probably couldn't even happen in my dreams dude.
Oh oh! Dreams come true!! Mine will!!
I am happ- No actually I am way to fucking bitter to be happy for you, because Unfortunately, mine will not be so courteous.
What does that mean?
That my dreams will not come true.
But dreams do come true.
Hey dude, you are like 6 right? That means you have not yet realized how shitty life is for some people. For some of us, things never work out how we want them to. Life is a big disappointment and a hard fucking. For others, life is good. -At this point I stop and think, I really should not be telling this girl this shit now, because I have to hear the parents bullshit when she repeats it.-
Ashley, forget everything I just told you, go enjoy childhood, its supposed to be the easy part of life.
But...
Look dude here is a fucking dollar, go buy some candy.
THANKS BRIAN!!
Hang on, what were we talking about?
Candy?
That's good, here is another dollar, get some soda while you are up there.
Well I do not want to repeat the last part of my last blog exactly so now we have...
Well yeah, So then I am on myspace and facebook a lot more than I am on here because my phone is quite cunty and will not load this site so easily. Add me on there, Brian Quintanilla, tastycorpse666@yahoo.com. Or text your obscenities to 3616552223.
I have just had a fucking tooth yanked from my fucking skull. I very much wanted to yell. I also wanted to talk to the really pretty girl there at the dentist's office, but its difficult with a mouth full of blood.
So I have just figured out how to use my phone's net on my pc. It is just fucking slow!
The job is still not so great. turns out I am an electrical apprentice, got lied to about the pay. bitches, but I do have another job lined up. It will be much better.
In other news, I have recently had a back injury, at home!!!!!!! SO I got stuck with the bill on that one, even though it was work related. What a bunch of shit that was. And I have also been informed at work that I am a loser for being the only person in our company that is single. I should be getting some kinda points for that shit there. My sister is supposed to be having a baby sometime very soon. I hate children but have been trying to tolerate them. The other day at the bowling alley I interacted with children via coloring. I learned that I still have kick ass skills with crayons, they learned about heroin and cocaine.When I was finished turning the candle guy from Beauty and the Beast into a heroin junkie I left the table for my usual table. The children followed me! One said I want to sit in your lap. Immediate response, WHOA!! Not going to happen, here take the chair. Another asked the same question. Again I gave up a chair. A boy this time asked to sit in my lap. I explained what it meant to man up and get his own chair. So then One of the children said Brian can you help me get some water, the little kids water fountain is broken and I can't reach the other. Kid was like 5 or so, I was impressed with the communication skills so I agreed to help, I set up a chair so they could all drink. A few minutes later I decided to return the chair so I went back to get it. The same girl grabbed my left strangler and asked if I would help her go to the restroom because she really needs to pee! I said hang on! Who is Madison's mom?? The mother asked what I wanted and I said, I will help her get some water but I draw the line at helping her to the restroom. Seriously, what the fuck is going on with these kids!? So I hsve 15 or so new poems for my book. It is coming along brilliantly. Now all I have to do is finish it and convince others that it is brilliant. That may be a tough one, I just need to get enough chemicals into the water supply. So yeah I am on facebook and myspace a lot more than here because my phone is kinda cunty and will not load this page so easily. Add me on there, Brian Quintanilla, tastycorpse666@yahoo.com. Or text your obscenities to 3616552223.
So I have just figured out how to use my phone's net on my pc. It is just fucking slow!
The job is still not so great. turns out I am an electrical apprentice, got lied to about the pay. bitches, but I do have another job lined up. It will be much better.
In other news, I have recently had a back injury, at home!!!!!!! SO I got stuck with the bill on that one, even though it was work related. What a bunch of shit that was. And I have also been informed at work that I am a loser for being the only person in our company that is single. I should be getting some kinda points for that shit there. My sister is supposed to be having a baby sometime very soon. I hate children but have been trying to tolerate them. The other day at the bowling alley I interacted with children via coloring. I learned that I still have kick ass skills with crayons, they learned about heroin and cocaine.When I was finished turning the candle guy from Beauty and the Beast into a heroin junkie I left the table for my usual table. The children followed me! One said I want to sit in your lap. Immediate response, WHOA!! Not going to happen, here take the chair. Another asked the same question. Again I gave up a chair. A boy this time asked to sit in my lap. I explained what it meant to man up and get his own chair. So then One of the children said Brian can you help me get some water, the little kids water fountain is broken and I can't reach the other. Kid was like 5 or so, I was impressed with the communication skills so I agreed to help, I set up a chair so they could all drink. A few minutes later I decided to return the chair so I went back to get it. The same girl grabbed my left strangler and asked if I would help her go to the restroom because she really needs to pee! I said hang on! Who is Madison's mom?? The mother asked what I wanted and I said, I will help her get some water but I draw the line at helping her to the restroom. Seriously, what the fuck is going on with these kids!? So I hsve 15 or so new poems for my book. It is coming along brilliantly. Now all I have to do is finish it and convince others that it is brilliant. That may be a tough one, I just need to get enough chemicals into the water supply. So yeah I am on facebook and myspace a lot more than here because my phone is kinda cunty and will not load this page so easily. Add me on there, Brian Quintanilla, tastycorpse666@yahoo.com. Or text your obscenities to 3616552223.
Well I got a new job yesterday. I do not know what the job is yet, I just took it on the understanding that it did not require me having to touch shit with my bare hands. Naturally I am unhappy with the pay and will hate the job, so my job search continues.
OCTOBER 2011
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SEPTEMBER 2011
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JULY 2011