I can't be 36. I'm not qualified.
Thirty-six-year-olds have families and cute houses with perfectly manicured lawns. They pick kids up at soccer practice and go home to their wives and everyone asks how each other's day was. They have normal day jobs and wear
ties and look at their stock portfolios.
I have none of these things. I watch cartoons and think waffles and beer make an appropriate dinner. My stock portfolio consists entirely of pizza coupons. I'm an immature jackass who gets excited by finishing a mission on Grand Theft Auto. I have no kids, but I have a dog, and I like to pry his jaws apart and stick my head in there like he's a lion.
So how the hell can I be 36? I'm simply not qualified.
Thirty-six-year-olds have families and cute houses with perfectly manicured lawns. They pick kids up at soccer practice and go home to their wives and everyone asks how each other's day was. They have normal day jobs and wear
ties and look at their stock portfolios.
I have none of these things. I watch cartoons and think waffles and beer make an appropriate dinner. My stock portfolio consists entirely of pizza coupons. I'm an immature jackass who gets excited by finishing a mission on Grand Theft Auto. I have no kids, but I have a dog, and I like to pry his jaws apart and stick my head in there like he's a lion.
So how the hell can I be 36? I'm simply not qualified.
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
bigwhelturnsmal:
Happy Birthday man. I have more to say but I am incorrent as of now. But anyway happy birthday.
lucy:
Happy birthay cutie!