"Polaris is my lover and all you other bitches better STEP!"

"i love me some polaris. you are one of the funniest ladies i know. i love you so much. we need another trampoline girls night with spin the "cellphone"


sushi? soon? please?"

"no matter how many times i re-write this (somewhere in the hundreds by now i'm sure) it's still not going to express my full gratitude towards this girl. Let's start with how easy it is to care for someone that has only love to give. Or how easy it is to think of someone as family when you feel like they have been there the whole time.

Polaris has only ever shown me love, and respect. A true friend to the fullest definition. I don't express myself very well, but she always seems to know what i am trying to say.

You are a great and caring person, and I am more then glad to have had the fortune of meeting you. You are cared for, you are loved, and you are respected to the fullest. These are words I do not toss around like most people use them. They are real, and from my heart.

"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends." I am glad to have you as a friend."

"She loves pink silly string cocks on her windows."

"Testi...Wait...testEmonial-part2

ANYONE would be lucky to have you as their main squeeze,cuz you are the living embodiment of coolwomanness. Shut up, it's a word!
and did i mention i gotta do her in the pooper?"

"[Edited to tell everyone how SUPER AWESOME Polaris is]

From the moment I met your naked self in the pool after Rock Bottom, I knew you would be the raddest girl to know (and you are) but I didn't know how much I would enjoy hanging out with you. We can be gross and obscene...and talk about buttsex forever! And then cuddle.

I love you...let's get married."

"Testimonial: How can you not love a woman who has probably had more booty lovin' than prison era Robert Downey Jr. You are FUN like butter, only funner!"

"Polaris said I'm her fucker ha take it."

"Polaris is one of the few great (read: sexy) things to come out of our dreadful junior high. If I saw her again I'd be all over her like white on rice."

"She can dance to Nelly! Need I say more? Fun, fun."

"Polaris is psychic, and possesses psychic abilities, and is precognitive.

And knew I was going to write this!

Weird."

"Not only can she party, but she's down to pick me up so I can join her...

It takes little more for me to be down for life."

"P-Dizzle rocks the house like no other. The only other person in the world that I know of that was born to fuck."

"dude, this chica can fucking party like no other.
keep rockin!"