age: 31 (Apr 02, 1982)

MEMBER SINCE: April 2003

occupation: Akward, sardonic asshole. Thread Killa'.

sign: Bridge out 4 feet ahead

fantasy: Something including 40 square feet of Fruit Rollups and an Alfred Hitchcock monologue.

body mods: Untouched by the needles of pop culture. Also I don't have any money.

i lost my virginity: I bet you would have never guessed.

stats: Surly & Grizzly on good days

most humbling moment: Turning in my sixty-page essay entitled "Why I Hate Every Damned One Of You" in eighth grade, which soon after came to be known as the "Confetti Incident."

gets me hot: I'm male. How difficult could it possibly be?

crush: Janeane Garofalo, Maria Bamford

makes me sad: The military made me stupid.

makes me happy: Entropy.