The fun part about helping someone move is you get be smug and judgmental about what they own (e.g. poor taste in books, art, furniture). Oh, and here's a tip: if you're not bothering to pack up all your stuff, you should at least make sure to move your...um..."intimate paraphernalia" before your friends disassemble your bed.
Sometimes I wonder how I get on these lists. Every couple of months I get a robot-call from some group promoting an African-American Leadership conference at McCormick Place or somewhere else in the coming weeks. The slate of speakers is a veritable murderer's row of reverends and doctors from Georgia and South Carolina. I'm sure this is big news for some people, but I'm neither African-American nor looking for leadership.
But anyhow, they've been going on for a couple years now. Does anybody else (in the Chicago area) get these calls?
But anyhow, they've been going on for a couple years now. Does anybody else (in the Chicago area) get these calls?
Foaming At The Mouth
Late Breaking Alert!!
"Sunset Boulevard" is on TCM at 1:15 AM Central. Make sure you pay careful attention to Joe Gillis' cornered animal aesthetic early in the film. It really speaks to me, depicting those feelings of pent-up frustration mixed with survival instinct. Then when opportunity finds him, he's in the perfect state of mind to roll with whatever comes next.
Enjoy, students! There will be discussion on this topic tomorrow.
Late Breaking Alert!!
"Sunset Boulevard" is on TCM at 1:15 AM Central. Make sure you pay careful attention to Joe Gillis' cornered animal aesthetic early in the film. It really speaks to me, depicting those feelings of pent-up frustration mixed with survival instinct. Then when opportunity finds him, he's in the perfect state of mind to roll with whatever comes next.
Enjoy, students! There will be discussion on this topic tomorrow.
Foaming At The Mouth
Spare Some Change?
Some years ago I knew a guy who when approached by beggars who asked 'Spare some change?', he'd snap back at them "Change comes from within." It was a smartassed answer by any measure, and probably not an entirely praiseworthy gesture towards some poor bastard wearing cardboard shoes. Well, now I was sick of the Presidential election long before Election Day and the only good thing about Inauguration Day is that I don't have to hear nearly as much crap about how magical it all is. Especially the fact of CHANGE.
The only news I cared about was that after the collapse of the American banking system, now the British banks are in turmoil and the stock market took another shit today. It's a great big shit sandwich that should concern anybody who hopes to earn an honest living in the foreseeable future, especially if your business needs money to expand or to tide them over a dry spell. (Those with a significant interest in the subject of why the banks are in a mess and what politicians had to do with it could read up on the repeal of the Glass-Steagall Act in 1999 Or ask me to explain it. I dare you.). One thing that occurred to me as I saw the festivities on TV is that we really can't lay the blame on George W. for much longer.
Then I thought about it some more. Blaming Bush is just too easy. And that's the problem, great and small, looking for easy answers and scapegoats. For all we can say about Ohio in 2004 or Florida in 2000, it doesn't change the fact that an overwhelming number of American voters (the ones who bothered to be involved in the process) were buying the horseshit that Bush's handlers had to offer.
-We don't need the rest of the world's help to ensure peace for ourselves and our interests abroad
-We don't need to face fiscal responsibility either in budget restraint or watching over private banks
-We don't need to pay attention to impact of our actions on the environment or ensure energy independence
-We don't need to take responsibility for actions. We will just leave it for somebody else to clean up.
It was a mighty seductive message for the nation of lazy and ignorant voters out there. George W. Bush may be gone, but the people who were gulled by his message still are. We've got the boot on their throats today. Let's not ever let it up. That's the real change for America that we can bring from within.
Spare Some Change?
Some years ago I knew a guy who when approached by beggars who asked 'Spare some change?', he'd snap back at them "Change comes from within." It was a smartassed answer by any measure, and probably not an entirely praiseworthy gesture towards some poor bastard wearing cardboard shoes. Well, now I was sick of the Presidential election long before Election Day and the only good thing about Inauguration Day is that I don't have to hear nearly as much crap about how magical it all is. Especially the fact of CHANGE.
The only news I cared about was that after the collapse of the American banking system, now the British banks are in turmoil and the stock market took another shit today. It's a great big shit sandwich that should concern anybody who hopes to earn an honest living in the foreseeable future, especially if your business needs money to expand or to tide them over a dry spell. (Those with a significant interest in the subject of why the banks are in a mess and what politicians had to do with it could read up on the repeal of the Glass-Steagall Act in 1999 Or ask me to explain it. I dare you.). One thing that occurred to me as I saw the festivities on TV is that we really can't lay the blame on George W. for much longer.
Then I thought about it some more. Blaming Bush is just too easy. And that's the problem, great and small, looking for easy answers and scapegoats. For all we can say about Ohio in 2004 or Florida in 2000, it doesn't change the fact that an overwhelming number of American voters (the ones who bothered to be involved in the process) were buying the horseshit that Bush's handlers had to offer.
-We don't need the rest of the world's help to ensure peace for ourselves and our interests abroad
-We don't need to face fiscal responsibility either in budget restraint or watching over private banks
-We don't need to pay attention to impact of our actions on the environment or ensure energy independence
-We don't need to take responsibility for actions. We will just leave it for somebody else to clean up.
It was a mighty seductive message for the nation of lazy and ignorant voters out there. George W. Bush may be gone, but the people who were gulled by his message still are. We've got the boot on their throats today. Let's not ever let it up. That's the real change for America that we can bring from within.
Every two or three weeks I head out the suburbs to my mother's house and take care of whatever projects need doing. The task I had had on my mind for the last month or two was trying to determine exactly what was skittering around in the attic. I could hear scratching and clawing and running back and forth from time to time; clearly there was something up there.
So it was off to Lowe's to buy an animal trap. Don't get on my case -- it's one of those humane traps where the prey walks in, steps on a hinged plate, and door a drops down behind it. Ten minutes of assembly and one peanut butter sandwich later, I climbed up the step ladder to the attic, put the cage into place, and began the waiting game.
Two hours later, I heard a lot of activity through the ceiling about where the cage was. A hour later the rattling noises continued, along with some excited squealing. I wasn't gonna wait until morning...
It was a squirrel! I had to put on gloves and throw a thick blanket over the cage as I lowered it from the attic trap door (lest the scared devil catch me with a claw). I took the cage down to the corner and gave it a stern warning to stay the hell out of the attic, then let 'im go.
The squirrel was foolish in one respect: it didn't even bother to finish the sandwich.
So it was off to Lowe's to buy an animal trap. Don't get on my case -- it's one of those humane traps where the prey walks in, steps on a hinged plate, and door a drops down behind it. Ten minutes of assembly and one peanut butter sandwich later, I climbed up the step ladder to the attic, put the cage into place, and began the waiting game.
Two hours later, I heard a lot of activity through the ceiling about where the cage was. A hour later the rattling noises continued, along with some excited squealing. I wasn't gonna wait until morning...
It was a squirrel! I had to put on gloves and throw a thick blanket over the cage as I lowered it from the attic trap door (lest the scared devil catch me with a claw). I took the cage down to the corner and gave it a stern warning to stay the hell out of the attic, then let 'im go.
The squirrel was foolish in one respect: it didn't even bother to finish the sandwich.
I Could Use A Laugh & So Could You
Frank Nelson never gets old
Rowdy Roddy Piper in "They Live!"
Life's advice from W.C. Fields is valuable indeed. Hearing it from Gary Busey...hmmmm...I dunno
Oh Benny Hill why haven't you been knighted yet?
Frank Nelson never gets old
Rowdy Roddy Piper in "They Live!"
Life's advice from W.C. Fields is valuable indeed. Hearing it from Gary Busey...hmmmm...I dunno
Oh Benny Hill why haven't you been knighted yet?
Foaming At The Mouth
Turn out the lights, the party's over
Ive been way too lazy to do periodic updates on football. It was just easier to wait until the end of the year and do a wrap-up on how things went. For the handful of people who might be interested, here's Northsider's Big Ten Football Postseason Review!
Penn State
What I thought before the season: Has great potential with so much returning experience...(but) inexperienced QB
What actually happened::The experience paid off, and the QB Daryll Clark rose to the occasion. They weren't the strongest Big Ten champ; they didn't have the "name" players or units that could strike fear into opponents' hearts. But neither did Alabama and they're looking at a national title slot.
Final assessment: Joe Paterno somehow managed to put himself front and center as an icon of enduring success. He's like the AARP poster boy.
Ohio State
What I thought before the season: If they win (against USC in week 2) they face few challenges in the conference slate and seem likely to be the B10's representative to the nation
What actually happened: Indeed, they faced few challenges in the rest of their schedule. But they lost that game to USC by an embarrassing margin and then the big in-conference game to Penn State.
Final assessment: Anytime Ohio State doesn't compete for the national title, they'll consider it a failed season. They still have trouble against spread offenses and it won't get any easier without Laurinaitus or Malcolm Jenkins next year
Michigan State
What I thought before the season: The Spartans will need to determine their identity. Are they going to rely on RB Jevon Ringer even though they have little experience on the line to block for him?
What actually happened: They figured it out all right. Jevon Ringer had a fine season and QB Brian Hoyer didn't mess things up
Final assessment: Like Penn State, they weren't spectacular but they won their ball games. They're looking at a New Year's Day bowl bid for their efforts.
Northwestern
What I thought before the season: New defensive coordinator Mike Hankwitz...is considered a fantastic acquisition for a program sorely in need of an upgrade on defense
What actually happened: Not only did Hankwitz pay immediate dividends on defense, but a surprising degree of depth showed up when several star players went out with injuries. The 'Cats finished a remarkable 9-3.
Final assessment: Pat Fitzgerald has moved to the head of the class as one of the NCAA's most impressive young coaches after earning a good bowl bid just three seasons after Randy Walker's untimely death.
Iowa
What I thought before the season: Iowa's reputation for a lack of discipline just got worse....There was the possibility (head coach Kirk Ferentz) would be fired even before the season started....Iowa's offense is one dimension short of being considered 'one-dimensional', and opponents will probably be able to pass all day.
What actually happened: RB Shonn Greene came out of nowhere to become the top rushing threat in the Big Ten. The early season stumbles shook off and the Hawkeyes finished in the top half of the conference.
Final assessment: Still skating on thin ice, Iowa is lucky to have salvaged a respectable finish to the season. The Penn State win was nice for the team's reputation. It's hard to see consistent success for this program until they lose the reputation for a lack of discipline
Minnesota
What I thought before the season: Probably won't be much better, but should be somewhat better. For the time being, with the defense in shambles, conference wins will be few. But should win some of the low-hanging fruit in non-conference play
What actually happened: Minnesota did FAR better than expected. They were even ranked in the top 25 after beginning the season 7-1. They slipped in the late going, but are not the conference doormat they were last year.
Final assessment: Head coach Adam Weber has recruited well and has good coordinators to support him. This turnaround was no fluke.
Wisconsin
What I thought before the season: A few beefy recruits could pay early dividends on the defensive line...Wisconsin has the front seven to make a mess of opposing teams, especially if the defense steps up...opening game vs. Akron gives fans a chance to learn about QB Allan Evridge, the Badgers' 4th new QB in 4 years
What actually happened: I hedged my preseason comments with a lot of ifs and maybes. The talent that Wisconsin had on paper didn't show up on the field. They reverted back to what cost them last season: injuries and underperformance
Final assessment: Head coach Bret Bielema isn't in jeopardy of losing his job. But the Badgers recruit well and really ought to be able to to play power football, winning the line of scrimmage and grinding out victories. Wisconsin fans must be very frustrated.
Illinois
What I thought before the season: Last year (2007) was a good year for proving Ron Zook can coach, not just recruit....Illinois stands as he most serious contender to OSU for the conference crown. And they'll probably get a top-tier bowl even if they don't
What actually happened: I was wrong, wrong, wrong. The Illini looked sluggish and unmotivated much of the season. They didn't lose that many star players (though Mendenhall and J Leman were significant) from the previous year but somehow they fell to pieces. The Illini went from the Rose Bowl to bowl ineligible in one season
Final assessment: QB Juice Williams still has acres of talent for his upcoming senior season and the team has recruited very well. Yet they still seem likely to sink to the lower-middle of the Big Ten going forward
Purdue
What I thought before the season: (Coach) Tiller and (QB) Painter can team up to go out with a bang. And they'll have some other weapons to work with...the Boilermakers could find themselves in the mix for the top echelon of the conference
What actually happened: Well they could have been near the top of the conference, but they weren't. Things could have turned out so much different if they'd held on for the win against Oregon in week 2.
Final assessment: One of those aching 'woulda, coulda, shoulda' years for Purdue. They knew they were facing a transition (Head coach Joe Tiller announced his retirement before the season). Don't be surprised if this program lands on its feet in the next two years.
Michigan
What I thought before the season: In the offseason Michigan football found itself in the middle of college football's biggest, messiest divorce...now UM has a new coach, a new offensive scheme, and needs a new QB, RB, and two new WRs...The first game vs. Utah is already tabbed as a possible upset
What actually happened: All the chickens came home to roost. The preseason top-25 ranking was based solely on the Michigan Wolverines brand-name rather than the many personnel losses and the obvious coaching turmoil.
Final assessment: By any measure, 2008 was the worst season in Michigan football history. Next season will probably be somewhat better, but concerns will dog this team for awhile
Indiana
What I thought before the season: This season shouldn't be too bad. They have the easiest schedule in all of Division 1-A, and they return their star QB Kellen Lewis, who can bedevil teams with either the run or the pass. Bowl eligibility is not unreasonable.
What actually happened: Kellen Lewis and the few other names on the team never got traction.
Final assessment: Second-year head coach Bill Lynch got a vote of confidence from the Indiana athletic director last week. If he can recruit some names and has time to develop them, then maybe Indiana has a future.
Turn out the lights, the party's over
Ive been way too lazy to do periodic updates on football. It was just easier to wait until the end of the year and do a wrap-up on how things went. For the handful of people who might be interested, here's Northsider's Big Ten Football Postseason Review!
Penn State
What I thought before the season: Has great potential with so much returning experience...(but) inexperienced QB
What actually happened::The experience paid off, and the QB Daryll Clark rose to the occasion. They weren't the strongest Big Ten champ; they didn't have the "name" players or units that could strike fear into opponents' hearts. But neither did Alabama and they're looking at a national title slot.
Final assessment: Joe Paterno somehow managed to put himself front and center as an icon of enduring success. He's like the AARP poster boy.
Ohio State
What I thought before the season: If they win (against USC in week 2) they face few challenges in the conference slate and seem likely to be the B10's representative to the nation
What actually happened: Indeed, they faced few challenges in the rest of their schedule. But they lost that game to USC by an embarrassing margin and then the big in-conference game to Penn State.
Final assessment: Anytime Ohio State doesn't compete for the national title, they'll consider it a failed season. They still have trouble against spread offenses and it won't get any easier without Laurinaitus or Malcolm Jenkins next year
Michigan State
What I thought before the season: The Spartans will need to determine their identity. Are they going to rely on RB Jevon Ringer even though they have little experience on the line to block for him?
What actually happened: They figured it out all right. Jevon Ringer had a fine season and QB Brian Hoyer didn't mess things up
Final assessment: Like Penn State, they weren't spectacular but they won their ball games. They're looking at a New Year's Day bowl bid for their efforts.
Northwestern
What I thought before the season: New defensive coordinator Mike Hankwitz...is considered a fantastic acquisition for a program sorely in need of an upgrade on defense
What actually happened: Not only did Hankwitz pay immediate dividends on defense, but a surprising degree of depth showed up when several star players went out with injuries. The 'Cats finished a remarkable 9-3.
Final assessment: Pat Fitzgerald has moved to the head of the class as one of the NCAA's most impressive young coaches after earning a good bowl bid just three seasons after Randy Walker's untimely death.
Iowa
What I thought before the season: Iowa's reputation for a lack of discipline just got worse....There was the possibility (head coach Kirk Ferentz) would be fired even before the season started....Iowa's offense is one dimension short of being considered 'one-dimensional', and opponents will probably be able to pass all day.
What actually happened: RB Shonn Greene came out of nowhere to become the top rushing threat in the Big Ten. The early season stumbles shook off and the Hawkeyes finished in the top half of the conference.
Final assessment: Still skating on thin ice, Iowa is lucky to have salvaged a respectable finish to the season. The Penn State win was nice for the team's reputation. It's hard to see consistent success for this program until they lose the reputation for a lack of discipline
Minnesota
What I thought before the season: Probably won't be much better, but should be somewhat better. For the time being, with the defense in shambles, conference wins will be few. But should win some of the low-hanging fruit in non-conference play
What actually happened: Minnesota did FAR better than expected. They were even ranked in the top 25 after beginning the season 7-1. They slipped in the late going, but are not the conference doormat they were last year.
Final assessment: Head coach Adam Weber has recruited well and has good coordinators to support him. This turnaround was no fluke.
Wisconsin
What I thought before the season: A few beefy recruits could pay early dividends on the defensive line...Wisconsin has the front seven to make a mess of opposing teams, especially if the defense steps up...opening game vs. Akron gives fans a chance to learn about QB Allan Evridge, the Badgers' 4th new QB in 4 years
What actually happened: I hedged my preseason comments with a lot of ifs and maybes. The talent that Wisconsin had on paper didn't show up on the field. They reverted back to what cost them last season: injuries and underperformance
Final assessment: Head coach Bret Bielema isn't in jeopardy of losing his job. But the Badgers recruit well and really ought to be able to to play power football, winning the line of scrimmage and grinding out victories. Wisconsin fans must be very frustrated.
Illinois
What I thought before the season: Last year (2007) was a good year for proving Ron Zook can coach, not just recruit....Illinois stands as he most serious contender to OSU for the conference crown. And they'll probably get a top-tier bowl even if they don't
What actually happened: I was wrong, wrong, wrong. The Illini looked sluggish and unmotivated much of the season. They didn't lose that many star players (though Mendenhall and J Leman were significant) from the previous year but somehow they fell to pieces. The Illini went from the Rose Bowl to bowl ineligible in one season
Final assessment: QB Juice Williams still has acres of talent for his upcoming senior season and the team has recruited very well. Yet they still seem likely to sink to the lower-middle of the Big Ten going forward
Purdue
What I thought before the season: (Coach) Tiller and (QB) Painter can team up to go out with a bang. And they'll have some other weapons to work with...the Boilermakers could find themselves in the mix for the top echelon of the conference
What actually happened: Well they could have been near the top of the conference, but they weren't. Things could have turned out so much different if they'd held on for the win against Oregon in week 2.
Final assessment: One of those aching 'woulda, coulda, shoulda' years for Purdue. They knew they were facing a transition (Head coach Joe Tiller announced his retirement before the season). Don't be surprised if this program lands on its feet in the next two years.
Michigan
What I thought before the season: In the offseason Michigan football found itself in the middle of college football's biggest, messiest divorce...now UM has a new coach, a new offensive scheme, and needs a new QB, RB, and two new WRs...The first game vs. Utah is already tabbed as a possible upset
What actually happened: All the chickens came home to roost. The preseason top-25 ranking was based solely on the Michigan Wolverines brand-name rather than the many personnel losses and the obvious coaching turmoil.
Final assessment: By any measure, 2008 was the worst season in Michigan football history. Next season will probably be somewhat better, but concerns will dog this team for awhile
Indiana
What I thought before the season: This season shouldn't be too bad. They have the easiest schedule in all of Division 1-A, and they return their star QB Kellen Lewis, who can bedevil teams with either the run or the pass. Bowl eligibility is not unreasonable.
What actually happened: Kellen Lewis and the few other names on the team never got traction.
Final assessment: Second-year head coach Bill Lynch got a vote of confidence from the Indiana athletic director last week. If he can recruit some names and has time to develop them, then maybe Indiana has a future.
Foaming At The Mouth
Countdown To Kickoff
I understand perfectly well that few of my readership cares about it but, dammit, I care about it so I'm gonna write about it. It's time for Northsider's Preseason Big Ten Football Power Rankings:
1.)Ohio State
Last year was a good year for: Establishing dominance in the Big Ten. Aside from their loss against Illinois, the rest of the conference provided few challenges and no scares
Last year was a bad year for: Changing perceptions. They further reinforced the idea that OSU was the best of a bad lot. Sure, they could run the table against creampuff non-conference teams and make short work of most the weak B10, but they were easily outclassed in the BCS championship game against a two-loss SEC team. They could go undefeated this season and might even lose out on a national championship berth due to low regard for their past BCS failures
In the offseason: Got an incredible break (not that they needed any) when star LB James Laurinaitus decided to forgo the NFL draft for his senior season. Barring injury, he's expected to be the top defensive player in the nation and a top 3 NFL draft pick. Then they landed the top high school recruit in the nation, QB Terrelle Pryor. The rich get richer.
This season: A 9/7 matchup against USC adds class to their schedule. If they win that game they face few challenges in the conference slate and seem likely to be the B10's representative to the nation
The next game: A tune-up against Youngstown State notable only to see how much playing time the true freshman Pryor gets and what he delivers
2.)Illinois
Last year was a good year for: Proving Ron Zook can coach, not just recruit. A win against OSU at Columbus and a Rose Bowl bid will silence a lot of critics.
Last year was a bad year for: Proving ability outside the conference. To be sure, two losses to a very strong Missouri team and perennial heavyweight USC are little to be ashamed of, but it shows you the kind of rare heights the Illini have risen to in short order.
In the offseason: Star RB Rashard Mendenhall graduated, but Ron Zook loaded up another blue-ribbon class of recruits
This season: Illinois stands as he most serious contender to OSU for the conference crown. And they'll probably get a top-tier bowl even if they don't
The next game: Vs. Missouri at neutral site St. Louis is one of the first major clashes of the season. It'll be two great QBs squaring off against two great defenses
3.)Wisconsin
Last year was a good year for: Keeping pace even when underachieving. I had last year's Badgers as my favorite to win the conference. They disappointed, but still soldiered on to 9 wins
Last year was a bad year for: Avoiding the injury bug. Key players, from star RB P.J. Hill on down, suffered from bumps and bruises that hobbled the team last year
In the offseason: Coach Bielema demanded improvement on D, so he replaced the defensive coordinator. A few beefy recruits could pay early dividends on the defensive line, too.
This season: It's 'give-the-ball-to-P.J. Hill-and-let-the-collisions-begin' on offense. Wisconsin has the front seven to make a mess of opposing teams, especially if the defense steps up
The next game: Vs. Akron gives fans a chance to learn about QB Allan Evridge, the Badgers' 4th new QB in 4 years
4.)Penn State
Last year was a good year for: Not much. A team that could have been a contender last year simply got valuable experience for this year. The seventeen returning starters undoubtedly want to get last year's problems off of everyone's minds
Last year was a bad year for: Discipline. Last year's PSU squad rivaled only Iowa for off-field embarrassments. Remember Paterno making the team clean the stadium after preseason infractions?
In the offseason: The Joe Paterno Death-Or-Retirement watch continues with no end in sight. QB Anthony Morelli is no longer in the picture, which ends a career filled with better promise than performance, and opens the door for new blood under center.
This season: Has great potential with so much returning experience. The entire offensive line returns, offering much needed protection for an inexperienced QB. And said QB will have much to work with in deep rushing and receiving corps.
The next game: Vs. Coastal Carolina but the real non-conference test is vs. Oregon State the week after. The Beavers aren't the team they were last year but could be a decent approximation of the foes awaiting in the B10
5.)Michigan
Last year was a good year for: Coming back from adversity. After the season-opening debacle against Appalachian State and stumble at the Oregon, the Wolverines managed to go 9-2 the rest of the way, making it to a middle-tier bowl and providing the B10's lone impressive bowl win.
Last year was a bad year for: Starting strong. Two losses in the opening weeks meant dramatically reduced expectations for a team entertaining a BCS bowl
In the offseason: Michigan football found itself in the middle of college football's biggest, messiest divorce. Rich Rodriguez left the state of West Virginia under police guard (seriously) after leaving the Mountaineers in the lurch. He brings a new system with him, which induced the heir-apparent QB to transfer out of the program as well as one of the most important linemen, indignant at the way the coaching change was handled. Worst of all, the lineman transferred to arch-rival Ohio State. So now UM has a new coach, a new offensive scheme, and needs a new QB, RB, and two new WRs.
This season: Michigan will have to rely on defense. That's far from a sure thing, but a sound line and secondary will smooth the way. Were it not for Michigan's stockpiles of raw talent they would be much further down the list.
The next game: vs. Utah is already tabbed as a possible upset
6.)Purdue
Last year was a good year for: Getting Joe Tiller off the hot seat as head coach. Purdue's big wins were nothing special (Iowa and the weakest Notre Dame team in football history) but they were games that Purdue ought to have won. That will keep the critics from having obvious claims to demand your ouster
Last year was a bad year for: Giving Curtis Painter a chance to shine. One of the most impressive veteran QBs going into last season, Painter could have really made people sit up and notice on a national basis. But nothing spectacular happened. No knock-your-eyes-out performances or victories, and the Boilermakers wound up with the B10 booby-prize of a bowl, the Motor City Bowl against Central Michigan
In the offseason: Joe Tiller announced this will be his last season. So that potential saga has been averted.
This season: Tiller and Painter can team up to go out with a bang. And they'll have some other weapons to work with: two workmanlike RBs, a series of decent but unproven WRs, and a defense that has slowly gained ground. The DTs are a strong spot, and the secondary has gotten better. With a few lucky breaks and the timely development of newer players, the Boilermakers could find themselves in the mix for the top echelon of the conference.
The next game: vs. Northern Colorado in two weeks, so Purdue has an extra week to scout and prepare.
7.)Northwestern
Last year was a good year for: Showing flashes of the old 'Northwestern style' of track-meet ball games. The Wildcats enjoyed great success over the Randy Walker era by luring other teams in shootouts and outlasting their opponents.
Last year was a bad year for: Taking advantage of an easy schedule. A home loss to Duke falls into the realm of inexcusable, and having to fight back into a 2OT home win against Minnesota is scarcely better. As the B10's smallest (and only private) university, NU needs bowl games to get the money and exposure necessary to stay in the 'arms race' of major college football. Being bowl eligible but not getting a bid is unacceptable if the Wildcats want to retain a semblance of competition in conference.
In the offseason: There were major shakeups in the administration. The athletic director left to become CEO of the Green Bay Packers (and promptly got ensnared in the Brett Favre soap opera), while Coach Pat Fitzgerald changed both offensive and defensive coordinators. New defensive coordinator Mike Hankwitz, late of the Wisconsin Badgers, is considered a fantastic acquisition for a program sorely in need of an upgrade on defense
This season: Will hinge on the new faces on the offensive line. C, LT, & LG all have new starters. An offense that comes loaded with talent at the skill positions will need those three to find their bearings in a hurry.
The next game: Vs. Syracuse features two teams that have fallen on hard times in the last three seasons and desperately need to get back to relavance
8.)Michigan State
Last year was a good year for: Getting back to a bowl game. MSU established Brian Hoyer as a reliable starter, laying the groundwork for him to be an obvious leader going into his senior season
Last year was a bad year for: Changing the old notion of MSU as underachievers. Even with star players in the offensive backfield and on the pass rush. The Spartans seemed unable to translate that into getting into the top tier of the conference. Single-digit losses to OSU, Michigan, and Wisconsin made it seem so close yet so far away.
In the offseason: Lost key players all over the place. RB, WR, O-line, D-line, the bleeding never stopped.
This season: The Spartans will need to determine their identity. Are they going to rely on RB Jevon Ringer even though they have little experience on the line to block for him? Will they rely on Hoyer's passing even though they have little in the way of proven receivers? Are they going to be a suffocating defense with their LB and secondary units?
The next game: at California so there will be little time for the Spartans to make it up as they go along
9.)Iowa
Last year was a good year for: No longer worrying if Kirk Ferentz will leave for the NFL or a deeper-pocketed college program
Last year was a bad year for: Everything else.
In the offseason: Iowa's reputation for a lack of discipline just got worse. As of five weeks ago, Kirk Ferentz was in a shitload of trouble for his alleged part in covering up a dorm room sexual assault committed by two of his former players. There was the possibility he'd be fired even before the season started.
This season: Probably won't change much. Iowa's offense is one dimension short of being considered 'one-dimensional', and opponents will probably be able to pass all day
The next game: against Maine and the game after that against Florida Int'l are just scrimmages until the important in-state rivalry game against Iowa State. And that game has been a stumbling block for most of the decade.
10.)Indiana
Last year was a good year for: Making a bowl game. For the first time since the early-90s, Indiana football played an extra frame. A much needed boost of confidence for what has been traditionally a basketball school
Last year was a bad year for: No jokes here. Before last season, and for the second offseason in a row, the Big Ten lost a head football coach to an untimely death. Terry Hoeppner's battle with brain cancer ended a little over a year ago and the Hoosiers won their games with a heavy heart
In the offseason: They lost several key players, none more important than WR James Hardy. But the loss of three offensive linemen won't help any either. Indiana just can't recruit to replace those players that quickly
This season: Shouldn't be too bad. They have the easiest schedule in all of Division 1-A, and they return their star QB Kellen Lewis, who can bedevil teams with either the run or the pass. Bowl eligibility is not unreasonable. But an actual bowl bid is another story -- especially if the conference fills its contractual obligation bowls -- in light of the Hoosiers' soft schedule
The next game: Vs. Western Kentucky should give them an opportunity to see how the defense holds up in game situations, especially for star pass rush DE Greg Middleton
11.)Minnesota
Last year was a good year for: Putting in a base. Things just can't get much worse (arithmetically speaking) than a 1-11 record. But that was deceiving. Three of those were tight overtime losses, and two others were by a total of eight points. A few breaks the other way and the Golden Gophers would have been a .500 ballclub
Last year was a bad year for: Getting into the win column. Losing can get to be a habit, and Minnesota just couldn't break that habit last year. The Minnesota locker room must have been a damnably frustrating place to be, especially know how close they came time and again.
In the offseason: Coach Tim Brewster somehow finagled a top 20 recruiting class, so help should be on the way
This season: Probably won't be much better, but should be somewhat better. For the time being, with the defense in shambles, conference wins will be few. But talented offensive coordinator Mike Dunbar should use elements of the spread offense to win some of the low-hanging fruit in non-conference play
The next game: vs. Northern Illinois for a clash of teams looking back on not-too-distant rosier days
Countdown To Kickoff
I understand perfectly well that few of my readership cares about it but, dammit, I care about it so I'm gonna write about it. It's time for Northsider's Preseason Big Ten Football Power Rankings:
1.)Ohio State
Last year was a good year for: Establishing dominance in the Big Ten. Aside from their loss against Illinois, the rest of the conference provided few challenges and no scares
Last year was a bad year for: Changing perceptions. They further reinforced the idea that OSU was the best of a bad lot. Sure, they could run the table against creampuff non-conference teams and make short work of most the weak B10, but they were easily outclassed in the BCS championship game against a two-loss SEC team. They could go undefeated this season and might even lose out on a national championship berth due to low regard for their past BCS failures
In the offseason: Got an incredible break (not that they needed any) when star LB James Laurinaitus decided to forgo the NFL draft for his senior season. Barring injury, he's expected to be the top defensive player in the nation and a top 3 NFL draft pick. Then they landed the top high school recruit in the nation, QB Terrelle Pryor. The rich get richer.
This season: A 9/7 matchup against USC adds class to their schedule. If they win that game they face few challenges in the conference slate and seem likely to be the B10's representative to the nation
The next game: A tune-up against Youngstown State notable only to see how much playing time the true freshman Pryor gets and what he delivers
2.)Illinois
Last year was a good year for: Proving Ron Zook can coach, not just recruit. A win against OSU at Columbus and a Rose Bowl bid will silence a lot of critics.
Last year was a bad year for: Proving ability outside the conference. To be sure, two losses to a very strong Missouri team and perennial heavyweight USC are little to be ashamed of, but it shows you the kind of rare heights the Illini have risen to in short order.
In the offseason: Star RB Rashard Mendenhall graduated, but Ron Zook loaded up another blue-ribbon class of recruits
This season: Illinois stands as he most serious contender to OSU for the conference crown. And they'll probably get a top-tier bowl even if they don't
The next game: Vs. Missouri at neutral site St. Louis is one of the first major clashes of the season. It'll be two great QBs squaring off against two great defenses
3.)Wisconsin
Last year was a good year for: Keeping pace even when underachieving. I had last year's Badgers as my favorite to win the conference. They disappointed, but still soldiered on to 9 wins
Last year was a bad year for: Avoiding the injury bug. Key players, from star RB P.J. Hill on down, suffered from bumps and bruises that hobbled the team last year
In the offseason: Coach Bielema demanded improvement on D, so he replaced the defensive coordinator. A few beefy recruits could pay early dividends on the defensive line, too.
This season: It's 'give-the-ball-to-P.J. Hill-and-let-the-collisions-begin' on offense. Wisconsin has the front seven to make a mess of opposing teams, especially if the defense steps up
The next game: Vs. Akron gives fans a chance to learn about QB Allan Evridge, the Badgers' 4th new QB in 4 years
4.)Penn State
Last year was a good year for: Not much. A team that could have been a contender last year simply got valuable experience for this year. The seventeen returning starters undoubtedly want to get last year's problems off of everyone's minds
Last year was a bad year for: Discipline. Last year's PSU squad rivaled only Iowa for off-field embarrassments. Remember Paterno making the team clean the stadium after preseason infractions?
In the offseason: The Joe Paterno Death-Or-Retirement watch continues with no end in sight. QB Anthony Morelli is no longer in the picture, which ends a career filled with better promise than performance, and opens the door for new blood under center.
This season: Has great potential with so much returning experience. The entire offensive line returns, offering much needed protection for an inexperienced QB. And said QB will have much to work with in deep rushing and receiving corps.
The next game: Vs. Coastal Carolina but the real non-conference test is vs. Oregon State the week after. The Beavers aren't the team they were last year but could be a decent approximation of the foes awaiting in the B10
5.)Michigan
Last year was a good year for: Coming back from adversity. After the season-opening debacle against Appalachian State and stumble at the Oregon, the Wolverines managed to go 9-2 the rest of the way, making it to a middle-tier bowl and providing the B10's lone impressive bowl win.
Last year was a bad year for: Starting strong. Two losses in the opening weeks meant dramatically reduced expectations for a team entertaining a BCS bowl
In the offseason: Michigan football found itself in the middle of college football's biggest, messiest divorce. Rich Rodriguez left the state of West Virginia under police guard (seriously) after leaving the Mountaineers in the lurch. He brings a new system with him, which induced the heir-apparent QB to transfer out of the program as well as one of the most important linemen, indignant at the way the coaching change was handled. Worst of all, the lineman transferred to arch-rival Ohio State. So now UM has a new coach, a new offensive scheme, and needs a new QB, RB, and two new WRs.
This season: Michigan will have to rely on defense. That's far from a sure thing, but a sound line and secondary will smooth the way. Were it not for Michigan's stockpiles of raw talent they would be much further down the list.
The next game: vs. Utah is already tabbed as a possible upset
6.)Purdue
Last year was a good year for: Getting Joe Tiller off the hot seat as head coach. Purdue's big wins were nothing special (Iowa and the weakest Notre Dame team in football history) but they were games that Purdue ought to have won. That will keep the critics from having obvious claims to demand your ouster
Last year was a bad year for: Giving Curtis Painter a chance to shine. One of the most impressive veteran QBs going into last season, Painter could have really made people sit up and notice on a national basis. But nothing spectacular happened. No knock-your-eyes-out performances or victories, and the Boilermakers wound up with the B10 booby-prize of a bowl, the Motor City Bowl against Central Michigan
In the offseason: Joe Tiller announced this will be his last season. So that potential saga has been averted.
This season: Tiller and Painter can team up to go out with a bang. And they'll have some other weapons to work with: two workmanlike RBs, a series of decent but unproven WRs, and a defense that has slowly gained ground. The DTs are a strong spot, and the secondary has gotten better. With a few lucky breaks and the timely development of newer players, the Boilermakers could find themselves in the mix for the top echelon of the conference.
The next game: vs. Northern Colorado in two weeks, so Purdue has an extra week to scout and prepare.
7.)Northwestern
Last year was a good year for: Showing flashes of the old 'Northwestern style' of track-meet ball games. The Wildcats enjoyed great success over the Randy Walker era by luring other teams in shootouts and outlasting their opponents.
Last year was a bad year for: Taking advantage of an easy schedule. A home loss to Duke falls into the realm of inexcusable, and having to fight back into a 2OT home win against Minnesota is scarcely better. As the B10's smallest (and only private) university, NU needs bowl games to get the money and exposure necessary to stay in the 'arms race' of major college football. Being bowl eligible but not getting a bid is unacceptable if the Wildcats want to retain a semblance of competition in conference.
In the offseason: There were major shakeups in the administration. The athletic director left to become CEO of the Green Bay Packers (and promptly got ensnared in the Brett Favre soap opera), while Coach Pat Fitzgerald changed both offensive and defensive coordinators. New defensive coordinator Mike Hankwitz, late of the Wisconsin Badgers, is considered a fantastic acquisition for a program sorely in need of an upgrade on defense
This season: Will hinge on the new faces on the offensive line. C, LT, & LG all have new starters. An offense that comes loaded with talent at the skill positions will need those three to find their bearings in a hurry.
The next game: Vs. Syracuse features two teams that have fallen on hard times in the last three seasons and desperately need to get back to relavance
8.)Michigan State
Last year was a good year for: Getting back to a bowl game. MSU established Brian Hoyer as a reliable starter, laying the groundwork for him to be an obvious leader going into his senior season
Last year was a bad year for: Changing the old notion of MSU as underachievers. Even with star players in the offensive backfield and on the pass rush. The Spartans seemed unable to translate that into getting into the top tier of the conference. Single-digit losses to OSU, Michigan, and Wisconsin made it seem so close yet so far away.
In the offseason: Lost key players all over the place. RB, WR, O-line, D-line, the bleeding never stopped.
This season: The Spartans will need to determine their identity. Are they going to rely on RB Jevon Ringer even though they have little experience on the line to block for him? Will they rely on Hoyer's passing even though they have little in the way of proven receivers? Are they going to be a suffocating defense with their LB and secondary units?
The next game: at California so there will be little time for the Spartans to make it up as they go along
9.)Iowa
Last year was a good year for: No longer worrying if Kirk Ferentz will leave for the NFL or a deeper-pocketed college program
Last year was a bad year for: Everything else.
In the offseason: Iowa's reputation for a lack of discipline just got worse. As of five weeks ago, Kirk Ferentz was in a shitload of trouble for his alleged part in covering up a dorm room sexual assault committed by two of his former players. There was the possibility he'd be fired even before the season started.
This season: Probably won't change much. Iowa's offense is one dimension short of being considered 'one-dimensional', and opponents will probably be able to pass all day
The next game: against Maine and the game after that against Florida Int'l are just scrimmages until the important in-state rivalry game against Iowa State. And that game has been a stumbling block for most of the decade.
10.)Indiana
Last year was a good year for: Making a bowl game. For the first time since the early-90s, Indiana football played an extra frame. A much needed boost of confidence for what has been traditionally a basketball school
Last year was a bad year for: No jokes here. Before last season, and for the second offseason in a row, the Big Ten lost a head football coach to an untimely death. Terry Hoeppner's battle with brain cancer ended a little over a year ago and the Hoosiers won their games with a heavy heart
In the offseason: They lost several key players, none more important than WR James Hardy. But the loss of three offensive linemen won't help any either. Indiana just can't recruit to replace those players that quickly
This season: Shouldn't be too bad. They have the easiest schedule in all of Division 1-A, and they return their star QB Kellen Lewis, who can bedevil teams with either the run or the pass. Bowl eligibility is not unreasonable. But an actual bowl bid is another story -- especially if the conference fills its contractual obligation bowls -- in light of the Hoosiers' soft schedule
The next game: Vs. Western Kentucky should give them an opportunity to see how the defense holds up in game situations, especially for star pass rush DE Greg Middleton
11.)Minnesota
Last year was a good year for: Putting in a base. Things just can't get much worse (arithmetically speaking) than a 1-11 record. But that was deceiving. Three of those were tight overtime losses, and two others were by a total of eight points. A few breaks the other way and the Golden Gophers would have been a .500 ballclub
Last year was a bad year for: Getting into the win column. Losing can get to be a habit, and Minnesota just couldn't break that habit last year. The Minnesota locker room must have been a damnably frustrating place to be, especially know how close they came time and again.
In the offseason: Coach Tim Brewster somehow finagled a top 20 recruiting class, so help should be on the way
This season: Probably won't be much better, but should be somewhat better. For the time being, with the defense in shambles, conference wins will be few. But talented offensive coordinator Mike Dunbar should use elements of the spread offense to win some of the low-hanging fruit in non-conference play
The next game: vs. Northern Illinois for a clash of teams looking back on not-too-distant rosier days
Foaming At The Mouth
Only Six More Days!
You know where I'm gonna be seven Saturday afternoons this fall?
Sec. 127, row 27, seat 16!
Here's what my view of the field will look like:
See, it was Meet-The-Team night for the Northwestern football team on Friday. Basically a promotional/thank you event for all the season ticket holders. The difference this year is they were having activities all over the field (for the benefit of all the families with small kids) and we had the run of the stadium.
The grass is a little patchy and they haven't finished the stenciling...
...but there's nothing like being out on a well-manicured field of play. My camera is excellent but it doesn't do justice to the uniform height and texture of the grass
As I say there were football-related children's activities going on down on the field after the introductions. At the south end zone the kicking team was playing with the kids, letting 'em try punts and field goals. This girl (couldn't have been older than 14) walked up, kicked off her sandals, and place-kicked a ball through the uprights from the three-yard-line. Everybody was quite impressed and asked her to do it again.
You can't tell from this picture but she did it. And if you think that's nothing then you've never tried it.
Up on the terrace above the north end zone, players were taking pictures with fans. I was having none of that. I went straight for the cheerleaders.
Hel-loooooo Jenny and Kirsten! (Note: Those rather prominent sweat circles are from where I was carrying my backpack. Ruins the picture. I'll just have to get another one!)
I've met Pat Fitzgerald probably half a dozen times and he never fails to intimidate the fuck out of me. You can see that he's bigger than I am but the picture doesn't do it justice; he's considerably brawnier than I am. I wouldn't want the guy mad at me on or off the field. My two consolations are that I only see him at events where he's more or less obligated to treat me diplomatically and that he takes just as goofy-looking a picture as I do.
Coming this Friday: The beginning of my Big Ten football blogs that only I will be interested in!
Only Six More Days!
You know where I'm gonna be seven Saturday afternoons this fall?
Sec. 127, row 27, seat 16!
Here's what my view of the field will look like:
See, it was Meet-The-Team night for the Northwestern football team on Friday. Basically a promotional/thank you event for all the season ticket holders. The difference this year is they were having activities all over the field (for the benefit of all the families with small kids) and we had the run of the stadium.
The grass is a little patchy and they haven't finished the stenciling...
...but there's nothing like being out on a well-manicured field of play. My camera is excellent but it doesn't do justice to the uniform height and texture of the grass
As I say there were football-related children's activities going on down on the field after the introductions. At the south end zone the kicking team was playing with the kids, letting 'em try punts and field goals. This girl (couldn't have been older than 14) walked up, kicked off her sandals, and place-kicked a ball through the uprights from the three-yard-line. Everybody was quite impressed and asked her to do it again.
You can't tell from this picture but she did it. And if you think that's nothing then you've never tried it.
Up on the terrace above the north end zone, players were taking pictures with fans. I was having none of that. I went straight for the cheerleaders.
Hel-loooooo Jenny and Kirsten! (Note: Those rather prominent sweat circles are from where I was carrying my backpack. Ruins the picture. I'll just have to get another one!)
I've met Pat Fitzgerald probably half a dozen times and he never fails to intimidate the fuck out of me. You can see that he's bigger than I am but the picture doesn't do it justice; he's considerably brawnier than I am. I wouldn't want the guy mad at me on or off the field. My two consolations are that I only see him at events where he's more or less obligated to treat me diplomatically and that he takes just as goofy-looking a picture as I do.
Coming this Friday: The beginning of my Big Ten football blogs that only I will be interested in!
