Okay, so I didn't exactly go into Eye-rack in a technical sense, but I got close and I saw it and that ought to count for something. This is how I know about Russia, and it prepares me for the presidency, because I have actually seen Russia up pretty close, because it is right next to us in Alaska. We know the Russians from eyeballing them.

The truth is, I didn't actually want to go into Eye-rack, and I don't know why my campaign said I had been there, visiting the troops in harm's way. I actually always wanted to stay in Kuwait, because if had gone into Eye-rack that would have made me like all the other politicians who have gone into Eye-rack -- a Washington insider. As a mom, I don't have to have any experience at these things. You would not ask a man to have any experience, and so I don't understand why I am being asked about this. Do I think I need this experience?

No, I do not.

It is the same with the bridge to nowhere. I was opposed to it all along, even though I wasn't and then it could not happen anyway. And so I said, thanks but no thanks. We will build our own bridge if we want to. Which we do not.

Are we going to build that bridge?

No, we are not.

Sometimes, because of the media and the pundits and pollsters, I get attacked for saying things that I did say, but I didn't want to say, if you know what I mean. I did ask about how to get books out of the library, but not because I wanted to or because I objected to a certain book, but just because I felt like asking the question. Three times.

It's the same with Eye-rack. To me, being close and being there is the same thing, but better. Because the more you experience, the less you know, which is why experience only counts if you see it, not if you experience it. By peering into Eye-rack, I could tell the surge was working and we were winning and also that it was God's plan. I knew all this because I am a mom, and I am the only one on either ticket who is. You can look that up.

But let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.

And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter and the sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.