So I haven't had much to say lately. This morning, though, I had a little bit of an emotional reckoning when I woke up to an email from none other than the great Joe Hawley of Tally Hall (now working under the pseudonym ミラクルミュージカル) - holler if you're a fan!
It's been just about 4 years since I lost my brother to leukemia, and a sizeable chunk of the time since then has been spent in the shadow of Tally Hall's will they/wont't they album releases. This morning's email marked the release of his studio vaults - outtakes, demos, etc, from what could be considered his magnum opus. This is huge. The guy is notoriously private, and is constantly updating and re-working his ideas, especially while touring. One never knows quite what to expect from him stylistically, and even having heard a demo doesn't guarantee that the finished product will be anything along those lines. The journey to reach that point of hearing the final mixes for us, though, began long ago.
What brings the whole question of legacy into question is the inclusion of a song on this morning's album that we somehow pirated way, way back in the tender year of 2005. It wasn't a proper Tally Hall song and never appeared on either of their records. The solo album with the final mix wasn't released until 2012, so the piece was in flux and being re-written for no less than 7 years! And I'd heard later that Joe was unhappy with his private demos circulating before the proper album versions. The track we had gotten ahold of was promptly removed from circulation, but we always held on to it fondly.
It still breaks my heart that my brother never lived long enough to hear the completed version of the song we fell in love with. He would have flipped his lid! At least, I did. There was so much history and weight surrounding it, and it had been so radically re-designed that it was like all of a sudden hearing it for the first time. I think his legacy was living with passion. I'm still trying to figure out how to do that - I certainly have a deep love and respect for music, but there are so many other ways in which I hold myself back from experiencing the world the way he did.
But what does that say for the artist? Is it possible that he might be glad to know that someone loved and appreciated his work long before he ever felt comfortable revealing it? Could he even know the story behind our connection to his music? Part of me believes that, thanks to the power of the internet, artists can connect with fans in ways unlike anyone else had been able to do. It can also come much to their chagrin, as being too connected can spoil the freshness of something. The idea of a bootleg is certainly old news. But perhaps Joe's legacy is that despite the predatory nature of pirating music, the strength and singularity of his talent brought together two brothers, giving them hope and something to look forward to amid a dark time.
If you actually read this, head on over to www.hawaiipartii.com. And beware of seizures if you're epileptic. His work deserves to be heard, and I'm pretty sure my brother would just smile and nod in satisfied approval knowing Joe's music was living on.