eyecon86

cannibal
==


a dance of shadow
across a sky
dip the brush
and dab the canvas
speak to myself
the words
as he sings them to me
my eyes painting
the sky before me
the sun in my mind
translating this
imagery
into beauty
and the beauty
guiding my hand to
take pen to paper
his voice
the sun
my words
become
one
as
inspiration...
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less than words
-


long since past
what was said before
has gone away
left the way it came
words dont mean so much
when the passage of time
carries them away
they hold no comfort
in these solitary moments
there are no words to soothe
these old memories
they have come to reassure me
that time is moving
and i am not

i always...
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concession


i dont dream anymore of you
i dont think anymore of you
i have finally begun to drive you from
my fanatsies
i have once again begun to rebuild
my humility
but just when i dont think i need you anymore
you are back again
back to take more
only for you
will i commit this act of concession
stuck in the same old...
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dissonance
because its necessary
necessary to
deal with ones actions
to move on
regrets becomming
who we are
and who we are are memories
left with those
who follow and watch
the mantra spins so close
to being real
that dissonance of spirit
and soul
of action and reaction
takes from me any chance
of free will
trapped within the actions of the past
and...
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So today i am a quarter of a century old. I havent left to go anywhere yet. (I always roll over as soon as i wake up and check my email and all my messages everywhere), but todya i guess i am just putting off the inevitable.

I love my friends and family and i dont mind being the center of attention too much, but...
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Whoever said It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. must have been the one who was doing the dumping. Why is it that after so long feeling can still come back that you cannot control. Regret, anger, bitterness. Every once in awhile they rear their ugly head.

Maybe its because its always our fault. To fit into...
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i havent written a journal entry here in a long time. havent had much to say really on anything. life sometimes just sucks you dry and then just leaves you as a zombie just sort of walking around. i feel like i am coming out of a long sleep where i was dreaming about life and not actually living it.

guess i am just rambling....
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current mood: rockin

its my day off, gunna buy me a new scanner today and then fuck around and do nothin all day! ah its a good day...

currently listening to: MR BUNGLE

current mood: submissive

added some pictures because i just discovered i could

currently listening to: nothing - im going to sleep now - bye

current mood: creative

"how do you like your blueeyed boy Mister Death" -e.e. cummings

currently listeing to: perfect circle again!

current mood: [[[yawn]]]

happy underworld day!

currently listeing to: the underword soundtrack!