age: 41 (Aug 25, 1970)

MEMBER SINCE: October 2006

occupation: Stage Manager, all around theatre tech, and student.

makes me happy: Comedy through the misery of others, spending time with my closest friends,

gets me hot: Nasty porn.

sign: No molestar.

most humbling moment: Finding out that my engagement was over when I saw her profile on MySpace listing her as single.

heroes: John Browning, Eugene Stoner, Mikhail Kalishnikov, Stanley McCandless

stats: 5' 9"

i lost my virginity: at 19. I was trying to hold out until 21, but my hormones got the better of me.

crush: I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may be used to incriminate me.

fantasy: Having a basement of sexy women chained to posts and the walls. Taking my favorite slave upstairs, chaining her to a table and having my way with her.

into: Hopeless romanticism.