It's Valentine's day and i just wanted to wish everyone a day full of smiles and hugs. I love all you guys, have a wonderful day.



I haven't consistently be online for over a month. My money is so tight now, that I had lost all access to a phone or internet for the last forty days. And after the last seven months of hell, I"m just now settling completely into my most recent home (moved three times since july of last year)> Its a small apartment with my boyfriend, which is nice. I'm currently not really speaking to my father at all...the last time I did, it was because he wanted to borrow money from me and Trey (that's the boyfriend). All of it has me so very frustrated. I need a new job but nothing is really working for me in that aspect of life either. Le sigh. I know all of this is coming across as horribly mellow drmatic and depressing and I'm sorry for that. 
But I guess in the words of frank sinatra, "that's life".
But I guess in the words of frank sinatra, "that's life".
I can't sleep so I wrote...its a story but isn't based up on anything real, dominantly the feelings I have right now and how I wish they could really be. *sighs* sorry for grammar or just shitty writing on this one. Its late/early lol
I'm tired. *yawn*
I don't really sleep well at night anymore...maybe a couple hours during the day, but that's about it.
On the brightside though, because of some of the people I've met on this site, I have a new found desire to pick back up on my writing again. I've had writer's block for what seems like ages and I can finally write again after some unexpected inspiration.
I finally got my digital camera back from the friend I lent it to. That was nice. Took her forever to get around to actually returning it to me....Yay, New Pictures!
My dad had another heartattack last night
I didn't find out until this morning because "he didn't want to worry me". Most of the time, we have an incredibly open and honest relationship....and then he has some sort of a health problem and refuses to tell me anything
He's not great but he's doing alright. This is his third one. Unfortunately, these sort of things run in my family.
And I know that most of you won't care but saturday I'll be in attendance at theMasque to celebrate my friend, JIll's, 20th birthday. If I happen to bump into some sg people that would really brighten my evening
Just thought I'd put that out there 
~xo~
p.s. sorry if that was all incoherent babbling...lack of sleep does that to me sometimes
I don't really sleep well at night anymore...maybe a couple hours during the day, but that's about it.
On the brightside though, because of some of the people I've met on this site, I have a new found desire to pick back up on my writing again. I've had writer's block for what seems like ages and I can finally write again after some unexpected inspiration.
I finally got my digital camera back from the friend I lent it to. That was nice. Took her forever to get around to actually returning it to me....Yay, New Pictures!
My dad had another heartattack last night
And I know that most of you won't care but saturday I'll be in attendance at theMasque to celebrate my friend, JIll's, 20th birthday. If I happen to bump into some sg people that would really brighten my evening
~xo~
p.s. sorry if that was all incoherent babbling...lack of sleep does that to me sometimes
Tonight was amazing.
I love the Sexaholics Chat...
I love new friends with pet snakes....
Life is great right now....and so is cyber sex.

~xo~
I love the Sexaholics Chat...
I love new friends with pet snakes....
Life is great right now....and so is cyber sex.
~xo~
I quit my job at 5:15 Sunday morning. I feel so incredible knowing that I never have to set foot there again...well, unless I want to buy flowers
My house finally got a new washer and dryer...no more laundry mat. Thank God. It sucks ass sitting there for two hours around a bunch of creepy people (most laundry mats probably aren't that bad but here, they are
).
Other than that, life hasn't been as horrible as it could be. So I"m trying to look at the bright side of things. Wish me luck.
~xo~
My house finally got a new washer and dryer...no more laundry mat. Thank God. It sucks ass sitting there for two hours around a bunch of creepy people (most laundry mats probably aren't that bad but here, they are
Other than that, life hasn't been as horrible as it could be. So I"m trying to look at the bright side of things. Wish me luck.
~xo~
The last couple of weeks have been nothing short of complete shit. 
Normally, I try and look upon my life with an optimistic twist and not dwell on the negatives that life can throw a person's way. But lately, I can't help feeling slightly deflated. In the last two weeks, two of my four favorite cats passed away. One was killed by my dog, Beast and the other died from internal bleeding caused from a person stepping on it. As if their deaths were not enough, I don't know who stepped on my cat. All I know is that same person, came into my house uninvited, stole my Smokin' Aces dvd and a box of my friends peach cigars that had been left in my living room. Then on top of all that, my dog beast (which killed my kitten lil vester) was killed in my front yard by someone (that I have no idea who is). My boyfriend and I left my house for an hour and when we came back, my dog was dead in my front yard with knife wounds all over its body.
Beyond deaths in the family, which I've taken fairly hard (the kittens especially), my job is making me feel like a helpless prisoner. Due to the financial standing of my home right now, any money I make is desperate needed to help pay bills and purchase groceries for my family. That's something that I normally wouldn't mind at all. But because of the horrendous treatment I'm recieving in the work place (mistreatment from my bosses and coworkers, harassment from my department boss, and inconsistent hours and scheduling) all I want to do is quit and relax a little bit. I can't even consider leaving an option though, until I have another job already. The money is something I just can't go without, even if its for only a week. *sighs*
With work and death on my mind, I can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed by any other tiny bad thing in life: a long wait in traffic, a bad hair day, a small family argument or fight with my boyfriend....its all like the end of the world for me. I'm just so very stressed out and don't know how to make myself any better at all.
I have a history of depression and I'm worried that all the progress I've been able to make in the last couple of years is going to start going down the drain because of all this drama that's simply out of my control.
Sorry for the rambling, I've just had a really lowsy couple of weeks and desperately needed to vent to someone other than my boyfriend.
~xo~
Normally, I try and look upon my life with an optimistic twist and not dwell on the negatives that life can throw a person's way. But lately, I can't help feeling slightly deflated. In the last two weeks, two of my four favorite cats passed away. One was killed by my dog, Beast and the other died from internal bleeding caused from a person stepping on it. As if their deaths were not enough, I don't know who stepped on my cat. All I know is that same person, came into my house uninvited, stole my Smokin' Aces dvd and a box of my friends peach cigars that had been left in my living room. Then on top of all that, my dog beast (which killed my kitten lil vester) was killed in my front yard by someone (that I have no idea who is). My boyfriend and I left my house for an hour and when we came back, my dog was dead in my front yard with knife wounds all over its body.
Beyond deaths in the family, which I've taken fairly hard (the kittens especially), my job is making me feel like a helpless prisoner. Due to the financial standing of my home right now, any money I make is desperate needed to help pay bills and purchase groceries for my family. That's something that I normally wouldn't mind at all. But because of the horrendous treatment I'm recieving in the work place (mistreatment from my bosses and coworkers, harassment from my department boss, and inconsistent hours and scheduling) all I want to do is quit and relax a little bit. I can't even consider leaving an option though, until I have another job already. The money is something I just can't go without, even if its for only a week. *sighs*
With work and death on my mind, I can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed by any other tiny bad thing in life: a long wait in traffic, a bad hair day, a small family argument or fight with my boyfriend....its all like the end of the world for me. I'm just so very stressed out and don't know how to make myself any better at all.
I have a history of depression and I'm worried that all the progress I've been able to make in the last couple of years is going to start going down the drain because of all this drama that's simply out of my control.
Sorry for the rambling, I've just had a really lowsy couple of weeks and desperately needed to vent to someone other than my boyfriend.
~xo~
So I'm getting my hair cut and dyed soon. I'll post pictures after but here's an idea of what I'm gonna do...
This is a link for the color...mostly going to be similar to the top picture on the right:
blood red hair coloring
and this is close to how i'm getting it cut:


As soon as I get it done...I will post pics
This is a link for the color...mostly going to be similar to the top picture on the right:
blood red hair coloring
and this is close to how i'm getting it cut:

As soon as I get it done...I will post pics
Here in Ohio, its 4:56 in the morning...and I have been awake since 10 am yesturday...I can't sleep...I haven't had a good nights sleep in over a week. I think the insomnia I used to get so frequently is slowly coming back. ugh. As if dealing with a friend with a concussion and massive pms isn't a pain in the ass enough, lets add exhaustion.
I had planned on attending SG Havana night later this evening but I don't think I can make it afterall. I have to work late and then, I have to deal with some problems at home. I'm pissed, yet another month I shall miss another SG get together. Le sigh.
Other than those things though, life is okay. The boyfriend is being a good guy. My pets are being behaved for once. I've met some really amazing people on here the last couple of days. (LEtranger being one of them) Its been okay. For the most part, the good and bad have balanced out on my scale of life.
I want to go running tomorrow. Hopefully the weathers nice enough to do so. I hate running alone, so if anyone near me wants to run sometime, you should message me and we can excercise together.
I'm off to make a bowl of corn flakes.
~xo~
I had planned on attending SG Havana night later this evening but I don't think I can make it afterall. I have to work late and then, I have to deal with some problems at home. I'm pissed, yet another month I shall miss another SG get together. Le sigh.
Other than those things though, life is okay. The boyfriend is being a good guy. My pets are being behaved for once. I've met some really amazing people on here the last couple of days. (LEtranger being one of them) Its been okay. For the most part, the good and bad have balanced out on my scale of life.
I want to go running tomorrow. Hopefully the weathers nice enough to do so. I hate running alone, so if anyone near me wants to run sometime, you should message me and we can excercise together.
I'm off to make a bowl of corn flakes.
~xo~
MARCH 2008
JANUARY 2008
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
DECEMBER 2007
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31


