For the first time in a long time I feel content. I finally feel completely whole after picking up the pieces from a broken relationship years ago. With out even realizing it I let go of an even older unrequited love. I'm not struggling to pay my bills, I have a roof over my head, I'm wrapping up my first semester of my second degree.
And I'm completely miserable.
I have spent so much of my life being depressed and angry I don't know how to be any other way. I feel flat as a person. I have no focus and no desire. Being angry and depressed became a part of my personality, a part of who I am as a person. When you are constantly battling to just keep your head above water its impossible not to be focused, because if you step off that razors edge you're going to sink to the bottom.
And I'm completely miserable.
I have spent so much of my life being depressed and angry I don't know how to be any other way. I feel flat as a person. I have no focus and no desire. Being angry and depressed became a part of my personality, a part of who I am as a person. When you are constantly battling to just keep your head above water its impossible not to be focused, because if you step off that razors edge you're going to sink to the bottom.