age: 57 (Aug 15, 1954)
MEMBER SINCE: March 2005
occupation: Gold and silversmith, creating beautiful things, restoring that which has lost its beauty. Single parent of 2 teen boys.
gets me hot: Great eyes and smiles. Playful nature, being slightly adventurous. Strong eye contact.
sign: Leo. Soul Younger than Body
stats: Too big, but getting smaller. Have found new motivation to chase fitness.
crush: Wishing to find one.........
i lost my virginity: A long, long time ago in a place far, far away.
makes me happy: Listening to my younger son make music, watching both of my boys on the snow (skiing, snowboarding). Spending time with a lady who can find great joy in small things and silliness. (Note to self, hard to find one like that). Reading. Getting more tattoos when I can afford to.
into: Music, mostly out of the 'mainstream'. Being outdoors on my motorcycle, camping, hiking. Music, art & craft festivals.
makes me sad: Lots of things, but mostly missing old friends who have gone onto different paths. Bad drivers, any age, anyplace, anytime. Not finding the answers I need after 20+ years. Not having a special lady in my life.
heroes: My 2 boys who already live life with passion and commitment even in their teens. People who can succeed in spite of their past failures and their checkered history.
most humbling moment: Realizing that I would have to change so that I would NOT be another copy of my father. 2nd, that those changes are awfully difficult, and sometimes are 'too little, too late'.
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I now find myself with a crazy mix of emotions:
Anger at her and both lawyers for dragging this out needlessly & expensively.
Sadness that someone I once loved so much has changed so much, and that she saw me & our marriage as unworthy of her effort. I'm a fixer, not a runner, but it takes 2 to make the problems, 2 to fix them.
Relief that it is finally over. It is the end of a chapter in life, but that is only the beginning of a new chapter.
And that perpetual optimist inside of me, the part that has been beaten down for so long, can now come up to the surface once again. Somewhere out there is a lady who can appreciate me, want me, accept me for who & what I am, and all she'll ask in return is the same.
So, it is time to set aside the sadness, anger and stress that has owned my soul for too long. Time to rediscover the simple joys of being alive, hoping to soon rediscover the joys of loving & being in love.