age: 94 (Jan 01, 1918)

MEMBER SINCE: June 2005

occupation: bookstore monkey

body mods: penis ladder 1 rung, nipple piercing

gets me hot: A girl who looks good in Kevlar with a shotgun.

sign: libra

i lost my virginity: at 13

fantasy: An S-Group

most humbling moment: There I was riotously drunk after leaving a bar. I managed to get a ride home with my now ex girlfriends best friend. Before you can say Jagermeister,I start puking. I make it out the door, and it should be fine. Except the stupid E-town copter is right over our car, and now has their spot light on me. They hover, whish whish whish, for a good 10 minutes. I’m surprised I didn’t wind up on A Channel.

makes me happy: My ideal house is anywhere with High Speed Internet, a large enough place for a home theatre, and some way to get deliveries. Everything else doesn’t matter. Be it on a boat, or on a goat, with a dog, in a log, I do not care, it it’s with a bear . As long as I can make loud sounds and have cable modem in the ground. Happy I am.

makes me sad: almost everything, and nearly nothing