Douglas Fir is a lazy person who doesn't update his blog nearly as often as he should. He also desperately needs to update his profile pic which seemed like a good idea at the time but now just seems hopelessly tragic. He is a hopeless romantic who is so painfully shy that no-one actually knows he's a hopeless romantic... unless of course they've read his self-penned third-person bio and then they're only taking his word for it.