I knew something was up with you...you usually don't go off the radar for that long hun! I'm glad to hear things are looking up as far as your housing situation is concerned, that's gotta really suck to not have anywhere to stay like that...never been in that place myself, but I know some who have and it's just miserable. That blows that your "friend" screwed you like that, what a bummer.

Now for the hard part...sorry 'bout your mom. Boy howdy do I understand what you are going through on that one! Does she live close by? I can't URGE YOU STRONGLY ENOUGH to spend as much time as possible with her before she goes....really, do whatever you have to do to be with her till the end. I missed saying goodbye to my dad when he died in 1997, also from cancer, and I've never forgiven myself for it. He was told by the doctor that he had a couple of months to live (2-3), and so when he called to tell us I booked a flight the next day, but for a 14 day advance purchase so it wouldn't be a kazillion dollars. I was supposed to arrive on a Saturday, and he died the Monday prior to my arrival. he only made it ten days after they gave him the news, and I was just devestated. With my mom, I spent the last week she was alive with her, didn't make the same mistake twice and flew down like the next morning... and was with her up to the day before she died. I wish I could have been there when it happened, just no way to make it go with running out of paid time off at work and I would have lost my job if I had stayed. But I'm grateful to have been around her for the time that I was, even if she was non-responsive after the first day...gave me time to heal some kind of deep wounds from my childhood. anyway, sorry to all that atcha, just really hope you have the opportunity to be with her while you can.

Things are a little goofed up here for me as well....it was just the anniversary of my mother's death recently, the first one and the day before that my son "ran away from home" and moved back to Spokane to live with his grandparents. He just couldn't make it work here, at least that's what he thought. I lost my job the week after that one, got royally fucked by my boss who didn't dig my tattoo and my vivid red hair too much, and since I was in my probation period she could get away with it.

And then (does that remind you of "Dude, where's your car?"the same as me?) this week I found out I have systemic lupus...you know what they say about raining and pouring I have a blog up about most of this right now, in case you have a chance to swing by.

I'm really glad you are OK, and that you were smart enough to stay at the mental health crisis center. I've lost someone dear to me from suicide, and it's a god-awful thing. I'm sure your girlfriend appreciates it more than she can say, as do I. I loves you big bunches, remember that!!

(holy fuck that 's a long comment!! )

good lord man!

congrats on making it through all that in one piece. i know we don't know each other in the least bit, but you seem like an ok guy, and i'm sure you're lady is cool. just so you know, if it ever comes to restaurant booths again, let me know. i've got a spare room with a futon that has to be more comfortable than a booth. just sayin.

all i can say is my greatest sympathy's with your mom. hang in there the best you can and just take some comfort in the fact that she's going to be so much better off.

hang in there man.

Oh, Brian..... It breaks my heart to read about all your hardship and heartbreak. I'm just glad that things sound like they're on an upswing for you. All good thoughts headed your way. Blessings to your mother, too, as she spends her final days with a son who obviously loves her so dearly. I hope your time with her is special. She's been a fighter for so very long and I'm sure you must be very proud of her for enduring the journey of cancer. Prayers will be said for all of you, my dear.

You don't need to know about my problems on top of your own and I already said all I wanted to so i'll just add:

I MISSED UFC 86!!!

Take it easy brother. You know how to get me if you need anything.

Heya! You hanging in there OK?? I'm worried about you!

Please let me know if you need a friend to talk to about any of what you are going through...I may be able to help!

Much loves, J

Hey!! Still worried.... please send me a PM and tell me your doing OK! You don't have to say anything else if you don't want to, I'm just wanting to know you are doing alright.

I wish I was in a position to offer help or support. I am sending lots of good vibes and karma your way. Sometimes it takes a minute to arrive, but be patient - it'll get there. I have close family who have battled cancer too. It's a tough road for everyone involved. My heart goes out to you in every way. Chin up, friend.