I've given up on "dating profile" type blog posts. Brevity is somewhat necessary for those, and my blog posts are infrequent and read more like an 800 word essay than a series of personal blurbs. So fuck it, I write what I want
.
I come from a bit of a tough love family and was kind of raised on two core phrases, "Suck it up, buttercup" and, "Go hard or go home" (as a side note, while I was writing this, I realized that could totally be some sort of Viagra slogan). Well, that and "I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it". We love each other, but we're not exactly loving. Strangely enough, this makes me even more of a romantic. I tried getting my family to start having board game nights, but the idea was rejected based on being too touchy-feely for our standards. We kind of max out on eating supper together.
I think we all have our own reasons for being distant. For most of my life I was a dreamer with my head in the clouds. I was reading Tolkien by the end of grade 3, but didn't learn how to make friends until highschool. My brother recently admitted he's had anger issues since at least grade 5, which included physical confrontations and thrown desks, but the teachers for some reason never told my parents about the incidents. I don't think he's making it up though, since I've always known him to be angrier and more high-stress than me; I just didn't know the extent of his problems. He's been getting better though and has started using meditation to change his perspective. My dad's parents had both died from lung cancer by the time he turned 12, so I don't think I need to elaborate on why he might have family issues. The only fully normal person in the family is my mom, who grew up with 6 siblings. Money was tight, since my grandpa mostly did unskilled labour type jobs, and grandma was the stay at home type. My family doesn't talk much about our...
I've given up on "dating profile" type blog posts. Brevity is somewhat necessary for those, and my blog posts are infrequent and read more like an 800 word essay than a series of personal blurbs. So fuck it, I write what I want
.
I come from a bit of a tough love family and was kind of raised on two core phrases, "Suck it up, buttercup" and, "Go hard or go home" (as a side note, while I was writing this, I realized that could totally be some sort of Viagra slogan). Well, that and "I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it". We love each other, but we're not exactly loving. Strangely enough, this makes me even more of a romantic. I tried getting my family to start having board game nights, but the idea was rejected based on being too touchy-feely for our standards. We kind of max out on eating supper together.
I think we all have our own reasons for being distant. For most of my life I was a dreamer with my head in the clouds. I was reading Tolkien by the end of grade 3, but didn't learn how to make friends until highschool. My brother recently admitted he's had anger issues since at least grade 5, which included physical confrontations and thrown desks, but the teachers for some reason never told my parents about the incidents. I don't think he's making it up though, since I've always known him to be angrier and more high-stress than me; I just didn't know the extent of his problems. He's been getting better though and has started using meditation to change his perspective. My dad's parents had both died from lung cancer by the time he turned 12, so I don't think I need to elaborate on why he might have family issues. The only fully normal person in the family is my mom, who grew up with 6 siblings. Money was tight, since my grandpa mostly did unskilled labour type jobs, and grandma was the stay at home type. My family doesn't talk much about our own personal lives, so I don't know much about my mom's youth, but I think she was fairly happy.
Considering these factors, I don't think it should come as any surprise I'm much closer with friends than family. My friends generally know how I feel about most things, what's going on in my life, etc. etc. My parents care that I'm okay, and they trust my judgement (other than when it comes to tattoos), but they don't know, or really care about anything going on with my life. Me and my brother have recently started bonding more, which I'm really happy about. This is especially important considering our plans to move into a house together in the new year.
I'm extremely excited about the idea, since it means more freedom. I can arrange the house the way I want, have friends over finally, and maybe even the occasional lady friend could visit. Even when I'm in a committed relationship, doing that is incredibly difficult and awkward, since my bedroom is next to my parent's bedroom. Its hard to approach a woman with anything even close to confidence in a sexual setting when your only options are your cramped car, or hoping you can go back to hers. Not that that's a huge priority to me, but, unfortunately for me, most settings where you can meet a girl in this town, are settings where its assumed you're there to get laid. Not that I'm opposed to sex, but I'd rather fuck someone after going out for coffee. That way at least I have better odds of remembering her name in the morning
. I hate this city and I hate trying to meet a nice girl in this town. I need to join some sort of church group for tattooed odd balls or something....
Anyhoo, that's tonight's rant.
I come from a bit of a tough love family and was kind of raised on two core phrases, "Suck it up, buttercup" and, "Go hard or go home" (as a side note, while I was writing this, I realized that could totally be some sort of Viagra slogan). Well, that and "I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it". We love each other, but we're not exactly loving. Strangely enough, this makes me even more of a romantic. I tried getting my family to start having board game nights, but the idea was rejected based on being too touchy-feely for our standards. We kind of max out on eating supper together.
I think we all have our own reasons for being distant. For most of my life I was a dreamer with my head in the clouds. I was reading Tolkien by the end of grade 3, but didn't learn how to make friends until highschool. My brother recently admitted he's had anger issues since at least grade 5, which included physical confrontations and thrown desks, but the teachers for some reason never told my parents about the incidents. I don't think he's making it up though, since I've always known him to be angrier and more high-stress than me; I just didn't know the extent of his problems. He's been getting better though and has started using meditation to change his perspective. My dad's parents had both died from lung cancer by the time he turned 12, so I don't think I need to elaborate on why he might have family issues. The only fully normal person in the family is my mom, who grew up with 6 siblings. Money was tight, since my grandpa mostly did unskilled labour type jobs, and grandma was the stay at home type. My family doesn't talk much about our...