You've got three new DVDs: Pulp Fiction, True Romance and Layer Cake. You choose to watch a film last night. Which one do you choose?
Answer... FIRE DOWN BELOW with STEVEN SEAGAL.
He played this EPA agent that's investigates some crooked businessman. Many times rednecks gather around him and many times he kicks their ass. He gets involved in a massive car chase leading to a juggernaut flying off the cliff but instead of bringing federal heat onto this town he instead goes to church and tells the town they're idiots. Then he figures out that his girlfriends' brother molested her and put her up to killing her father before fighting more rednecks in an underground cyanide dump, shooting barrels, spilling toxic waste and escaping before the dump explodes burying all the evidence. Then his boss betrays him and sets up two rednecks to capture his girlfriend but he saves her. While the businessman gets off with a $50,000 fine leading him to quit the EPA but he still teams with the police to arrest his boss, he goes viligante and kicks more redneck ass before threatening the boss' pissant wimp son so he'll turn state's eveidence. Then he goes to serve an arrest warrant on the boss and kicks casino security's ass, the boss' bodyguards asses before contronting the boss who pulls a gun but SEAGAL takes it away from him and threatens to set him up with a big boy called Tyrone. The boss pulls another gun, shoots an agent before SEAGAL shoots him in the shoulder and taunts him. SEAGAL calls in the shooting, leaves the bos holding a gun in his hand, doesn't even serve the warrant and walks out without a second thought.
What comedy! There's nothing like a bad Seagal movie. Unless it's like The Foreigner, which was really utter shit.
The sad thing is seven out of his first eight movies were great! On Deadly Ground was a big ass clunker but Michael Caine was funny. Since then it's been one unintenionally funny film after another, after another. Someday I will own his back catalogue of films and seriously question what I'm doing with me life.
An idea for a film: a SEAGAL movie set in Shetland. I could make that work.
I'll have enough time to watch the other DVDs today since I'm off for the rest of the week after re-aggravating my bloody shoulder. Lifted a skip lid funny I did, bastard thing just got worse ever since
Balls to it.
I think I'm going to try and get Steven Seagal's music album for Egg birthday. Serious.
To all my fellow Micks, half-Micks or adopted Micks out there: Happy St. Paddy's Day!
Why isn't Sg green for the day? If it can turn pink for a piece of shit saint like that buffoon Valentine it can do it for the Saint of the Irish. ahh, mysteries.
Answer... FIRE DOWN BELOW with STEVEN SEAGAL.
He played this EPA agent that's investigates some crooked businessman. Many times rednecks gather around him and many times he kicks their ass. He gets involved in a massive car chase leading to a juggernaut flying off the cliff but instead of bringing federal heat onto this town he instead goes to church and tells the town they're idiots. Then he figures out that his girlfriends' brother molested her and put her up to killing her father before fighting more rednecks in an underground cyanide dump, shooting barrels, spilling toxic waste and escaping before the dump explodes burying all the evidence. Then his boss betrays him and sets up two rednecks to capture his girlfriend but he saves her. While the businessman gets off with a $50,000 fine leading him to quit the EPA but he still teams with the police to arrest his boss, he goes viligante and kicks more redneck ass before threatening the boss' pissant wimp son so he'll turn state's eveidence. Then he goes to serve an arrest warrant on the boss and kicks casino security's ass, the boss' bodyguards asses before contronting the boss who pulls a gun but SEAGAL takes it away from him and threatens to set him up with a big boy called Tyrone. The boss pulls another gun, shoots an agent before SEAGAL shoots him in the shoulder and taunts him. SEAGAL calls in the shooting, leaves the bos holding a gun in his hand, doesn't even serve the warrant and walks out without a second thought.
What comedy! There's nothing like a bad Seagal movie. Unless it's like The Foreigner, which was really utter shit.
The sad thing is seven out of his first eight movies were great! On Deadly Ground was a big ass clunker but Michael Caine was funny. Since then it's been one unintenionally funny film after another, after another. Someday I will own his back catalogue of films and seriously question what I'm doing with me life.
An idea for a film: a SEAGAL movie set in Shetland. I could make that work.
I'll have enough time to watch the other DVDs today since I'm off for the rest of the week after re-aggravating my bloody shoulder. Lifted a skip lid funny I did, bastard thing just got worse ever since
Balls to it.
I think I'm going to try and get Steven Seagal's music album for Egg birthday. Serious.
To all my fellow Micks, half-Micks or adopted Micks out there: Happy St. Paddy's Day!
Why isn't Sg green for the day? If it can turn pink for a piece of shit saint like that buffoon Valentine it can do it for the Saint of the Irish. ahh, mysteries.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I watched a bit of Fire Down Below - peed myself at the luminous green "toxic" waste and then switched over to Showgirls!
Seagal movies are the best! hahahahah great fun for all to be had! even if they all suck..
damn man whats up with that shoulder? take it easy!
i was an adopted Mick for yesterday!