Meh. i feel bleh, same reasons as usual not gonna go into it really. basically, i miss her, i'm lonely, i want a relationship, i don't like who i am. simple enough.
on another note... my beard is coming along nicely. i just need to shave my neck really, which as soon as the bathroom is done i will do. i think the bathroom should...
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on another note... my beard is coming along nicely. i just need to shave my neck really, which as soon as the bathroom is done i will do. i think the bathroom should...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
Feeling kinda crappy again. i dunno. it seems like unless i have someone to constantly talk to i feel like crap. really the times i feel worst are when i'm at work doing my thing in the cellar, pulling shit putting it on the rollers and all that good fun. gives me time to think and i always think of the same person. i watch...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
ms_magdalena:
Oh no no, I definitely wanted to see you naked. 
beaky:
I really wish I could stop being so busy, but its not really my call...
;D
;D
Ok so the past couple weeks have been getting better and better for me in some aspects. so yeah i started working at my current job about 3 years ago. and i met the kid that's currently my best friend while working there about 1.5 years ago maybe. he's awesome. he knows all about my depression and such, and like when i am depressed he...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
user038538:
beards are my favorite! my bf shaved his off a few weeks ago and we almost broke up about it...he grew it back...poor guy.
perilouspup:
A). She's right, girls appreciate scruff!
B). And they say working out helps a lot with depression. (And if you could get one of those self-absorbed bitches on the treadmill to smile at you once and a while, it would help +1)
C). I wondered if Calypso's compulsive Oreo eating was the real reason for why she got so big.... (that must have been hard to deal with in Jr. High)
D). Denver, the Last Dinosaur?? How did I ever miss that one?
B). And they say working out helps a lot with depression. (And if you could get one of those self-absorbed bitches on the treadmill to smile at you once and a while, it would help +1)
C). I wondered if Calypso's compulsive Oreo eating was the real reason for why she got so big.... (that must have been hard to deal with in Jr. High)
D). Denver, the Last Dinosaur?? How did I ever miss that one?
I try to be a good person but when all is said and done i'm not.
i'm not the person i wanted to grow up to be. when i say that i don't mean that i don't have the things i want. i mean when i was younger i saw who i wanted to be. i wanted to be a kind and caring person who...
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i'm not the person i wanted to grow up to be. when i say that i don't mean that i don't have the things i want. i mean when i was younger i saw who i wanted to be. i wanted to be a kind and caring person who...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
sillyokio:
:hugs:
i don't hate you.
i don't hate you.
ontothenext:
take it easy! people can change... you can still become the person you want to be. Its never too late to do that.
so, i crave lots of attention... but i never get anywhere near enough. i've never really gotten enough attention in my life, i've actually been ignored a lot, and it's really sucked. that's really the main reason i have this complex. i actually did have one point in my life where i got enough attention but that's long since gone and that person will never...
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Got asked if i was a virgin the other day at work. bleh. i hate my un-ability to lie for the most part. but yeah it's not so bad cause it's one of the people i would be friends with probably, cause he's good people.
worked out my legs last night. first time in years i've done any sort of leg excersize. did leg presses...
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worked out my legs last night. first time in years i've done any sort of leg excersize. did leg presses...
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user038538:
cool! i wish i could afford to go to the gym right now, i really miss it.
so yeah you know what makes you feel good about yourself when you already feel utterly horrible about yourself? having people at work tell you your ugly all the time whether they are joking around with you or not. yeah it's awesome... spectacular. i really sometimes wonder why i feel so horrible about myself. oh wait. no no i don't.
yeah so i've realized, probably...
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yeah so i've realized, probably...
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user038538:
sounds like you work with assholes anyways
user038538:
how do you know you'll never fix things or change? have you tried?
Sometimes i hate being at work hearing the guys talk about their sex with their girlfriends. it kinda makes me feel like complete shit. even worse it makes me think about the same person as usual.
where does the line of love stop and the line of obsession begin?
why is it so wrong that i don't want to give up on someone who gave...
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where does the line of love stop and the line of obsession begin?
why is it so wrong that i don't want to give up on someone who gave...
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beaky:
We should totally get drunk together and listen to sad songs all day
saw this today and it made me giggle, so i decided to share it. cause yeah anything that can make me giggle has to be good.
who can be happy in a world where there's a god who kills kitten solely because you want to give yourself pleasure?
and i'm just gonna throw this out there cause i needa say it somewhere... i really wish...
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who can be happy in a world where there's a god who kills kitten solely because you want to give yourself pleasure?
and i'm just gonna throw this out there cause i needa say it somewhere... i really wish...
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user038538:
that was great!
i fucking did it again >.< i went to her myspace knowing i'd feel like shit, but i did it. i hate every fucking day i live without her. i hate it. i fucking loathe my entire being. i can't for the love of me stop loving her. and yet i know there is nothing i could ever do to get her back. i hate...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
user038538:
also, i looked at your myspace for the first time and you seem like a way more interesting person than you make yourself out to be on here.
user038538:
i'm sure you aren't being ignored intentionally, but i'm going to assume you keep to yourself...i'm telling you, all you have to do is get out (i think you need alot of things actually, but start here)...even by yourself...i wish i lived in *massachusets?? (*forgive my spelling errors, if there are any, i've never had to spell that before and i was too lazy to go look)
think about this. what do you contribute to the world? what do you do that means anything? what do you have to say to make anyone interested or make it affect someone's life? what is so important about you?
i think about things like that all the time. and honestly there's nothing that i can think of for answers. i don't have anything to talk...
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i think about things like that all the time. and honestly there's nothing that i can think of for answers. i don't have anything to talk...
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user038538:
"in the end it doesn't matter how genuine of a person you are if you can't show yourself off in other ways"...not true...i think that if someone is genuine it's an attractive trait...show that off...
what girl? the same girl?
what girl? the same girl?
*HUGS*
x x x