xep

Argh, more dreams about girls. I am going boi crazy. I was in a book store this time, rolling around on the worn wood floor and watching the movements of a well dressed androgyne. Hmm. That one has a pretty obvious origin though as there is a hotty dyke handbalancer who works in a bookstore that I oggle from the trapeze. (How humiliating would it...
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I just realized I can't remember who the last girl I kissed was. That's really upsetting.

le saw someone on the subway that she thought might be the walking dead. i love thinking about that. sometimes when i have a near miss, say, while crossing the street in front of a bus or when my rear tire slips out from under me but i recover, i wonder if maybe it wasn't a near miss... maybe i did die and have been...
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I was so moved by Bailey's beautiful bruises that i spent the evening attempting to beat the hell out of myself on the trapeze. i stripped to my skivvies to ensure maximum friction burns and decided to teach myself the neck hang after telling myself for years that i'd never do it. it was almost successful and some nice bodily injury did in fact occur....
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the optimism is waning. it's hard to stay afloat. maybe everything is really just all bad.

Here are some bad things that have happened lately:

- My car died.
- I got a huge speeding ticket on my motorcycle (20mph over in a double fine zone).
- My boss's father died (we're a small place. it hurts us all.)
- An important friendship entered a state of limbo.
- I crashed my motorcycle.

Despite all this, I am feeling very optimistic...
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Last night I dreamt I was doing trapeze at the top of the elevator shaft in a 23 story building. It was so tall and ridiculous and the knowledge that I would die if I fell off the trapeze was new and a little exciting. S5 was the rigger and seemed to think everything was a-ok safety wise. He encouraged me lean over the edge...
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on one side of the bed is a pile of dirty clothes. on the other side of the bed is a pile of clean clothes. i have a nest in the center where i sleep and this brings me great comfort. when i was 16 i actually got rid of my bed and just slept on a pile of clothes. i think i was a...
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rode my motorcycle to work today because the mini is still broken. the new ignition was supposed to arrive today but didn't. blame it on the rain. the rain. i've never ridden on the highway in rain like that. 101 was flooded near sausalito and the water was up to my feet. it threw them backwards on the pegs and i worried for a moment...
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yeti re-taught me how to play cribbage tonight. he also gave me a door knob. a burrito conquered me. some cats are here.