violently

My heart still hurts, but I have to make myself feel better; no one else can do it for me.

So, I called my wife Sinatras_doll and had a long chat with her, and then I called Garbage, and I have plans to get dinner with him tomorrow night. Then I called my tattoo artist and I have plans to meet with him on Saturday to start my right arm half sleeve. And then I went to my favorite mexican food place here in Simi and I bought myself a bigass carne asada burrito and I'm going to eat the whole thing because I'm sad and I can binge if I want to.

Continuing on my "make myself feel better" agenda, tomorrow I will go to the gym a million times, finish cleaning my room, go buy lots of candles (which I may go do tonight once the traffic to T.O. dies down), pray, and keep focusing on the fact that I know everything is going to be ok. It's all going to turn out the way I know it will, and I have to stop worrying. Sorry for being cryptic folks, but if I actually name the problem then it will only make me more upset and right now I feel semi-ok.

Everything is going to be ok. It is. It's going to work out and I"m going to be happy and everything is going to be fine.

And unless anyone of you disagrees with that, please feel free to send your positive vibes my way. I could use some reassurance and reinforcement right now. Thanks.