violently

I am horrifyingly tired. My therapist thinks I should not see Nick anymore unless he is willing to go to court with me to appeal the sentence. I don't want to think about it anymore as I have spent far too much time in tears as it is, and the fact that people keep telling me, "Well what if he holds it over you?" is sincerely not helping me feel better. Trust me people, I've thought about this, and I even told him I trusted him enough that I thought that he wouldn't. I don't think he will, especially since he never wants to deal with anything and he was more than willing to deal with this. That says a lot.

In other news, I am 6k in debt (woo school, and supplies, and certifications) and need to change credit cards cus my APR is like 23% or some shit, I don't want to go to work in an hour, and I want hugs and kisses and some ben & jerry's ice cream that will not make me fat EVAR. I spent 2 hours at the gym this morning and now I feel like I ruined it by eating a chicken, bean, rice, and cheese homemade burrito- which is ridiculous- I probably consumed like 600 calories max, which is not bad considering I haven't eaten anything else today nor do I plan on eating more because after I finish writing this I have no free time until like 8:30 tonight. Just goes to show you I am fucked in the head and probably have an eating disorder. WHO WANTS TO HIRE ME!?!?

I have too much to do and not enough time. Or enough money.

P.S. Someone do me a favor and buy me all the workout shit I have on my wishlist, especially the heart rate monitors and dumbbells. In return I will make you dinner, or come make out with you or something. Maybe both. If you're a pretty girl, for sure I will make out with you whether you buy me shit or not. I am in need of some hot girl makeout action. Hot damn.

Gotta run again. The fun never stops around here.