I broke the breakers.
Dreamt about Nick again last night. I want him out of my head.
Here's a little story I wrote awhile back...somehow it seems fitting to me today given the mood I'm in.
asthma
Annie is 11 and running. Her feet are hitting the pavement like rain, fast and hard, and her ragged breaths are like thunder. She can't breathe. She is having an asthma attack at the worst possible time, because she can't stop running. The Man is going to get her.
COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT, YOU MOTHERFUCKING CUNT, YOU LITTLE WHORE, YOU LITTLE FUCKING SONOFABITCH, YOU RETARD, YOU FUCKING...
Annie keeps running. She crosses the street as fast as her legs will carry her, away away away from her neighborhood, past the school, past the wash, past her whole life into the middle of the road and on to the farthest she has ever been in her entire life; 5 blocks away.
The man isn't even visible anymore but she keeps running. She thinks her lungs are going to explode, but she keeps going anyway. In a sense she almost welcomes the pain because it means she is still alive. For a little while at least.
At the farthest intersection from her house, where her mother goes to do the grocery shopping and fuck her boyfriend in the parking lot, Annie finally stops and tries to catch her breath (just one breath please god, please my lungs are bleeding i'm sorry please god i'll be good i promise please i'm sorry). She never has a chance. The 350 pound hispanic woman thats been tailing her does a great job of sqeezing the rest of the air out of Annie's lungs as she leaps on top of her and pins her to the ground.
YOU WERE GOING TO GET HIT, YOU WERE RUNNING IN THE STREET, YOU NEED TO GO HOME HONEY. HONEY IT'S OK, LET ME CALL YOUR DAD, STOP STRUGGLING HONEY HONEY HONEY...
It's the neighbor. Out trying to save the world again, trying to save Annie from herself. Gotta love the nosy neighbors, those bleeding heart born agains, always thinking of the children and what's best for them. And why, lookie here, Annie is a CHILD. An UNSUPERVISED child, running running running. No one ever stopped to ask her why she was running, they only questioned the fact that she was out of line, out of place, and out of order. Annie was hurting herself, this woman reasoned. Annie needed help, and help was at home. With THE MAN.
GET HER OFF ME GET HER OFF GET HER OFF GET HER OFF SHE'S NOT MY MOTHER GET HER OFF GET HER OFF
It doesn't matter that people are walking by while she's screaming. Look the other way. Keep walking. Pay no attention to the fat woman squashing the 11 year old into the cement. Sure it doesn't look like she can breathe all to well, but hey, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger right? Kid probably deserves it.
(you little bitch stop struggling ,you wanna get killed, you little brat i'm taking you home, you little bitch stop struggling, let me help you, listen to me, fuck, you little cunt stop struggling)
drowned out by
GET HER OFF GET HER OFF GET HER OFF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS SHE'S NOT MY MOM GET HER OFF ME GET HER GET HER GET HER
Annie starts to pass out and chokes on her own spit and mucus and blood that's now dribbling out of her nose. She thinks she is dying, and the irony is she never saw it coming. She thought she was running away, she didn't know she was running TO. As she blacks out Annie learns that you can't run away, you can never run away, because like her 350 pound hispanic woman, everything catches up to you and squeezes the life out of you while simultaneously crushing your body into the ground the minute you try to catch your breath.
Eventually the police come and remove the woman from her back. They handcuff Annie and tell her she's a bad girl. No one asks why she was running. No one cares. They bring her home to The Man.
Annie looks in the mirror that night, her face a mess of baseballs and blood, and laughs. It's all she can do.
Annie looks in the mirror. She still can't breathe.
Dreamt about Nick again last night. I want him out of my head.
Here's a little story I wrote awhile back...somehow it seems fitting to me today given the mood I'm in.
asthma
Annie is 11 and running. Her feet are hitting the pavement like rain, fast and hard, and her ragged breaths are like thunder. She can't breathe. She is having an asthma attack at the worst possible time, because she can't stop running. The Man is going to get her.
COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT, YOU MOTHERFUCKING CUNT, YOU LITTLE WHORE, YOU LITTLE FUCKING SONOFABITCH, YOU RETARD, YOU FUCKING...
Annie keeps running. She crosses the street as fast as her legs will carry her, away away away from her neighborhood, past the school, past the wash, past her whole life into the middle of the road and on to the farthest she has ever been in her entire life; 5 blocks away.
The man isn't even visible anymore but she keeps running. She thinks her lungs are going to explode, but she keeps going anyway. In a sense she almost welcomes the pain because it means she is still alive. For a little while at least.
At the farthest intersection from her house, where her mother goes to do the grocery shopping and fuck her boyfriend in the parking lot, Annie finally stops and tries to catch her breath (just one breath please god, please my lungs are bleeding i'm sorry please god i'll be good i promise please i'm sorry). She never has a chance. The 350 pound hispanic woman thats been tailing her does a great job of sqeezing the rest of the air out of Annie's lungs as she leaps on top of her and pins her to the ground.
YOU WERE GOING TO GET HIT, YOU WERE RUNNING IN THE STREET, YOU NEED TO GO HOME HONEY. HONEY IT'S OK, LET ME CALL YOUR DAD, STOP STRUGGLING HONEY HONEY HONEY...
It's the neighbor. Out trying to save the world again, trying to save Annie from herself. Gotta love the nosy neighbors, those bleeding heart born agains, always thinking of the children and what's best for them. And why, lookie here, Annie is a CHILD. An UNSUPERVISED child, running running running. No one ever stopped to ask her why she was running, they only questioned the fact that she was out of line, out of place, and out of order. Annie was hurting herself, this woman reasoned. Annie needed help, and help was at home. With THE MAN.
GET HER OFF ME GET HER OFF GET HER OFF GET HER OFF SHE'S NOT MY MOTHER GET HER OFF GET HER OFF
It doesn't matter that people are walking by while she's screaming. Look the other way. Keep walking. Pay no attention to the fat woman squashing the 11 year old into the cement. Sure it doesn't look like she can breathe all to well, but hey, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger right? Kid probably deserves it.
(you little bitch stop struggling ,you wanna get killed, you little brat i'm taking you home, you little bitch stop struggling, let me help you, listen to me, fuck, you little cunt stop struggling)
drowned out by
GET HER OFF GET HER OFF GET HER OFF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS SHE'S NOT MY MOM GET HER OFF ME GET HER GET HER GET HER
Annie starts to pass out and chokes on her own spit and mucus and blood that's now dribbling out of her nose. She thinks she is dying, and the irony is she never saw it coming. She thought she was running away, she didn't know she was running TO. As she blacks out Annie learns that you can't run away, you can never run away, because like her 350 pound hispanic woman, everything catches up to you and squeezes the life out of you while simultaneously crushing your body into the ground the minute you try to catch your breath.
Eventually the police come and remove the woman from her back. They handcuff Annie and tell her she's a bad girl. No one asks why she was running. No one cares. They bring her home to The Man.
Annie looks in the mirror that night, her face a mess of baseballs and blood, and laughs. It's all she can do.
Annie looks in the mirror. She still can't breathe.
trebo:
Feeling like Annie huh??