Today marks one week since I solidified my plans to travel. The idea had been bouncing round in my head for quite some time now, seemingly just out of reach, even despite the fact I've actually been saving towards it for just over a month. I knew one thing, I wanted to experience as much of the world, the different cultures and people in it as I possibly could.
It wasn't until this time last week when I dig out my world map, pinned it to the wall behind my desk and sat there and studied it, that my dream started to feel more real then it had before. The excitement truly started to build and the idea that this is something that I could actually do really hit home. Since then I have researched everyday, picked my starting point started to Learn, or should I say started to attempt to learn, Mandarin. My muddled brain attempts to add a French accent to it, which of course is hilarious to hear.
My plan is to break away from the structures that I have come to know so well, that give me a false sense of security and makes me feel ultimately, miserable. Throwing myself into the deep end, as I could have chosen to start in Australia or America, English speaking countries that wouldn't be as much of a culture shock and I did consider it due to it being a more seemingly sensible option, but I kept finding myself staring at South east Asia. I fantasised about the stunning beaches, incredible nature and absolutely fascinating people in it. Without really much forethought I started to figure out routes and goals and started to push out the ideas of the 'safer options' and then the deciding thought popped into my head, 'On your death bed we regret the things we didn't do over the things we did'. That was my mind made up, Asia is the ultimate goal and it is over all else what I want to experience the most. So south east Asia it it!
Some time ago when I had dipped my toe into some general travel research I was recommended a book called 'Vagabonding' By Rolf Potts and I started to make more sense of what exactly it was that I wanted to do. I wanted to break away as much as I possibly could from the norm, the idea of spending any time in a hotel or being in any form of major city, well it saddened me. I didn't want that, my guts twisted and my heart sank. Despite being brought up in the exact environment I couldn't possibly in vision myself being happy in.
So now I'm in a torn state, because even though I don't like the structure of the society I've been brought up in, it's so ingrained that my heart and head are playing a game of tug and war. I know which one will win but that that doesn't take away from the fact it is pretty difficult. Part of me thinks I will find it much easier to cope with the change of lifestyle once I'm immersed in a different culture and the other part of me thinks if I don't start preparing myself for it, I can't possibly enjoy my journey as much as if i had shrugged off the chins.
Luckily I've never been much of a material girl, as I outlined in a previous blog. So I am lucky in the sense that its not as difficult as it could be, but on the other hand if I were a material person would I even be considering a change so drastic as this? Probably not. So that in itself is a comfort, and reassures me that although realistically it will be a struggle, the fact that I want it so much is the biggest strength I have.
I also find myself contemplating that things in fact only result in temporary happiness and that I have what I hope to be a solution for long term happiness. Putting it that way makes it seems so incredibly easy doesn't it?! but keep in mind I'm actually attempting to change a habit of a lifetime.
So what is it exactly that I'm aiming for? 0 consumer consumption, only paying for essentials such as food, rent, pet products and travelling gear. But even with those basics there are opportunities to buy shit I don't need just because it's on offer, the lure of savings because something has been reduced, which of course saves you nothing because you didn't actually plan or need to buy that crap anyway. On top of that there are the lure of things that would make me happy in the mean time, like getting more tattoos, upgrading to a better quality t.v, getting the latest game console, camping trips, days out for memories made, alcohol, tobacco, take away's, steam sales, make up and clothes!
See this is why I've always loved writing things down, organising your thoughts and giving yourself the opportunity to reflect. Looking at that list makes me feel good, because it's not long and it's not filled with a million different challenges. It reassures me that my journey wont in fact be as difficult as I first perceived, or should I say it gives me more hope.
Let me know your thoughts on this blog and if you would like me to continue writing more about my travelling journey. If you have been to south east Asia and would be gratuitous enough to share your hints and tips drop me a PM ^.^
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