Taking some personal time.
Monday night I went out with friends like we usually do. Unfortunately I changed what usually takes place that evening. Rather than going home after we had our fill of Dive Bar, I drove a friend about 25 minutes north of where we were and where I live. I did this because there was someone where she was going who was coming back into the city and could drop me off at my car so I could go home.
One by one people were leaving the place we were at (a bar late night but outside on the porch hanging out since technically it was closed). My ride excused himself to the bathroom and said when he came back we'd go...well I didn't know there was a rear exit that led out to where he parked.
He left. And left me stranded because everyone else had gone. No one would answer their phones. Also my keys were stolen along with a pack of cigs, chapstick, and some perfume of mine. Must have had my phone in my hand when this took place.
I was stranded until about 11am when "the boy" came to get me.
He was pissed off. Talking nasty. I said I wouldn't get in the car with him if he was being nasty like that...he accused me of being drunk...every time I am upset and crying he accuses me of being drunk. I told him I wasn't, I had been hysterically crying all night and was scared. And only called him as a last resort. He wouldn't stop being nasty so I said it again, he got so pissed that he got in the car and said he was leaving, I told him to leave if he wasn't going to be nice to me, he took off.
This morning he broke up with me.
I waited yesterday for over 3 hours for a tow. Got my stuff out of my car.
And today I'm waiting for my new keys to be cut and programmed.
$200+ for new keys. Not even including keyless entry.
Gotta wait for my ride who should hopefully be here within an hour. Get a copy of my title. And off to Mazda we go.
I also emailed out of class. The emotional toll everything has taken on me....I could cry at any given moment. I am in no shape to go to class all day.
So I'll barricade myself in my apartment and hide under the covers all day.
At 8pm I'm going to AA.
I wasn't really even drinking when all of this took place, but nothing good has ever come out of being around alcohol or drinking alcohol.
I'm also going to look for a new psych and go once a week...if my insurance covers that many visits.
I know I definitely need some help.
So.
I deactivated my Facebook until it doesn't hurt to want to know what the boy is doing now. He's better off not being with me though. I really have no business being with anyone right now.
Self-realization sucks.
It almost hurts as bad as the boy breaking up with me.
Until next time.
I hope everyone had a better Monday and Tuesday and is having a better Wednesday as well.
Monday night I went out with friends like we usually do. Unfortunately I changed what usually takes place that evening. Rather than going home after we had our fill of Dive Bar, I drove a friend about 25 minutes north of where we were and where I live. I did this because there was someone where she was going who was coming back into the city and could drop me off at my car so I could go home.
One by one people were leaving the place we were at (a bar late night but outside on the porch hanging out since technically it was closed). My ride excused himself to the bathroom and said when he came back we'd go...well I didn't know there was a rear exit that led out to where he parked.
He left. And left me stranded because everyone else had gone. No one would answer their phones. Also my keys were stolen along with a pack of cigs, chapstick, and some perfume of mine. Must have had my phone in my hand when this took place.
I was stranded until about 11am when "the boy" came to get me.
He was pissed off. Talking nasty. I said I wouldn't get in the car with him if he was being nasty like that...he accused me of being drunk...every time I am upset and crying he accuses me of being drunk. I told him I wasn't, I had been hysterically crying all night and was scared. And only called him as a last resort. He wouldn't stop being nasty so I said it again, he got so pissed that he got in the car and said he was leaving, I told him to leave if he wasn't going to be nice to me, he took off.
This morning he broke up with me.
I waited yesterday for over 3 hours for a tow. Got my stuff out of my car.
And today I'm waiting for my new keys to be cut and programmed.
$200+ for new keys. Not even including keyless entry.
Gotta wait for my ride who should hopefully be here within an hour. Get a copy of my title. And off to Mazda we go.
I also emailed out of class. The emotional toll everything has taken on me....I could cry at any given moment. I am in no shape to go to class all day.
So I'll barricade myself in my apartment and hide under the covers all day.
At 8pm I'm going to AA.
I wasn't really even drinking when all of this took place, but nothing good has ever come out of being around alcohol or drinking alcohol.
I'm also going to look for a new psych and go once a week...if my insurance covers that many visits.
I know I definitely need some help.
So.
I deactivated my Facebook until it doesn't hurt to want to know what the boy is doing now. He's better off not being with me though. I really have no business being with anyone right now.
Self-realization sucks.
It almost hurts as bad as the boy breaking up with me.
Until next time.
I hope everyone had a better Monday and Tuesday and is having a better Wednesday as well.
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in other news, if you get stuck like that, call me. by the time i logged into fb and saw your posts it was evening. you have my number and i don't care if you wake me up. if you get stuck somewhere call my ass.