HELL YEAH, MOTHER FUCKER! HELL YEAH!
Like pretty much everyone else on this site, I was once a big fucking dork (Once?! More like still! Haha, yeah!) But before you let conjecture take control and you mentally dress me in a cape and floppy wizard hat, I will tell you exactly what kind of a dork I was. I was a martial arts dork. The worst breed of dork to ever let their passion keep them from getting laid.
I did it all, baby. I started in karate when I was five. Took it until I was ten. Took Tai Kwon Do when I was twelve. Taught it until I was fifteen. Overlapped that at a fucking Ninjitsu school until I was eighteen where some crazy asshole taught me the easiest way to break a collar bone and re-insert it into someone's heart.
After everything I've learned over the years, I think I'd like to teach one more class to help those where no one was there to help me. It would simply be called "You are not Asian (unless you are). You are not a spiritual warrior. You do not have chi. And you will get fucking KILLED in a real fight. Oh, and Bruce Lee was a coked up rock-star...who got laid!"
The first lesson would focus on how someone like me will throw a handful of rocks in your face while you're bowing to me and upper-cut you in the dick if you try to throw a kick above my waist.
Anyway, that was the backstory behind that fucking sweet picture I found at my parent's house. Here's the other one.
Like pretty much everyone else on this site, I was once a big fucking dork (Once?! More like still! Haha, yeah!) But before you let conjecture take control and you mentally dress me in a cape and floppy wizard hat, I will tell you exactly what kind of a dork I was. I was a martial arts dork. The worst breed of dork to ever let their passion keep them from getting laid.
I did it all, baby. I started in karate when I was five. Took it until I was ten. Took Tai Kwon Do when I was twelve. Taught it until I was fifteen. Overlapped that at a fucking Ninjitsu school until I was eighteen where some crazy asshole taught me the easiest way to break a collar bone and re-insert it into someone's heart.
After everything I've learned over the years, I think I'd like to teach one more class to help those where no one was there to help me. It would simply be called "You are not Asian (unless you are). You are not a spiritual warrior. You do not have chi. And you will get fucking KILLED in a real fight. Oh, and Bruce Lee was a coked up rock-star...who got laid!"
The first lesson would focus on how someone like me will throw a handful of rocks in your face while you're bowing to me and upper-cut you in the dick if you try to throw a kick above my waist.
Anyway, that was the backstory behind that fucking sweet picture I found at my parent's house. Here's the other one.
VIEW 25 of 50 COMMENTS
seth0067:
yeah yeah, i miss you too, fag.
judypatricia:
Did you get my text message, foo'?