Okay, this will be the last posting for a while.... or maybe I am just saying that...
So, I got the house, I have dishes in it, and nothing else. I am too busy at work to move this week. So I will be moving Sunday. I got the basics; bed, tv, DISHES, clothes, other stuff... Yeah, no couch, no coffee table, no kitchen table. It will be pretty bare for a while.
Now it is time to go emo. I appologize in advance for this brief laspe in sanity. This might seem totally creepy too... bare with me on this one.
Tink made a comment in my journal that other day about being paranoid. The turth is, I am very paranoid. I am afraid someone will figure out what I have done in the recent past and pick me off as a evil, evil, bastard, who doesn't deserve to have friends. Now I can see a bunch of people asking me, what did you do that was so bad, and all I can say is I can't talk about it. It is not that I don't want to talk about it, which I kind of do just to get it off my chest but it is out of respect that I don't. I also don't want to talk about it because I am afraid the person (people) who are listening will take my side on this without hearing the other side. Hell, I don't even know what the other side of the story is, and I am still not taking my side on this. If someone wants to know, they have to look somewhere else....
If there are people out there that know me and what I have done, and are still reading this with good intentions, I thank you for you kindness.
I was listening to Audioslave's "Doesn't Remind Me" and I was actually crying by the end of it. It was not the first time I heard it and I know why I was crying but I don't know why I started crying then. Maybe because the pain is still there, maybe it was the guilt that won't go away, maybe it was just a bad day.
Sorry I had to get that off my chest. *WHEW*
Now, my trip to Edmonton was awesome! I got see a very good and old friend. Friday night was spent playing some video game and this game call Munchkin. That is the best game ever!!!!! I think I have to pick me up a copy of that.
Saturday, I final got to see World of Warcraft in action. I am totally glad I have not started to play that, it would own my soul. (Yes I still got one ) I then got to see the band that my friend roadies for. They rocked. They were a cover band called Seven Devil Fix. If they ever start writing their own stuff, they just might take off.
I have been working hard the pass couple of days. Wheww, gettting stuff ready for my home and working 9 hours days is not good for me.
Well, I guess I should start packing up here soon. Noooo... I going to watch Survivor.
Have a great day all!!!!
So, I got the house, I have dishes in it, and nothing else. I am too busy at work to move this week. So I will be moving Sunday. I got the basics; bed, tv, DISHES, clothes, other stuff... Yeah, no couch, no coffee table, no kitchen table. It will be pretty bare for a while.
Now it is time to go emo. I appologize in advance for this brief laspe in sanity. This might seem totally creepy too... bare with me on this one.
Tink made a comment in my journal that other day about being paranoid. The turth is, I am very paranoid. I am afraid someone will figure out what I have done in the recent past and pick me off as a evil, evil, bastard, who doesn't deserve to have friends. Now I can see a bunch of people asking me, what did you do that was so bad, and all I can say is I can't talk about it. It is not that I don't want to talk about it, which I kind of do just to get it off my chest but it is out of respect that I don't. I also don't want to talk about it because I am afraid the person (people) who are listening will take my side on this without hearing the other side. Hell, I don't even know what the other side of the story is, and I am still not taking my side on this. If someone wants to know, they have to look somewhere else....
If there are people out there that know me and what I have done, and are still reading this with good intentions, I thank you for you kindness.
I was listening to Audioslave's "Doesn't Remind Me" and I was actually crying by the end of it. It was not the first time I heard it and I know why I was crying but I don't know why I started crying then. Maybe because the pain is still there, maybe it was the guilt that won't go away, maybe it was just a bad day.
Sorry I had to get that off my chest. *WHEW*
Now, my trip to Edmonton was awesome! I got see a very good and old friend. Friday night was spent playing some video game and this game call Munchkin. That is the best game ever!!!!! I think I have to pick me up a copy of that.
Saturday, I final got to see World of Warcraft in action. I am totally glad I have not started to play that, it would own my soul. (Yes I still got one ) I then got to see the band that my friend roadies for. They rocked. They were a cover band called Seven Devil Fix. If they ever start writing their own stuff, they just might take off.
I have been working hard the pass couple of days. Wheww, gettting stuff ready for my home and working 9 hours days is not good for me.
Well, I guess I should start packing up here soon. Noooo... I going to watch Survivor.
Have a great day all!!!!
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
Gray
P.S. It sounds as if you are still harboring alot of guilt and blame. Forgive yourself already!