Just watched the bootleg of Dragonball: Evolution on Youtube (apparently someone snuck a camera into the Chinese premiere or something) and i can say without a shadow of a doubt that this movie SUCKS. There is no need for me to guess that it will suck, and now there is no need for me nor any of you on my friends' list to hope to be pleasantly surprised.
Besides the fact that Goku's played by a white guy, is in highschool, and basically starts at the beginning of the story as the "nice guy who gets picked on by the jocks," besides the fact that Piccolo wears an all leather bodysuit a la Trinity, besides the fact that ERNIE FUCKING HUDSON plays a grandmaster monk/priest at some sacred temple, besides the fact that Yamucha doesn't wear a speck of red and has a valley-boy "dude" accent (oh and is BLONDE, despite being played by an asian actor), besides the fact that it bears repeating that GOKU IS PLAYED BY A WHITE GUY, this movie was just so much tripe. Poorly acted, poorly directed, the CG effects were only ok, and it had a crappy title screen ending (the new replacement for the classic B-grade action movie freeze frame). The fight scenes weren't anything to write about or even speak of; i don't know why they bothered to make this.
If they were trying to cash in on Dragonball's fame and fan appeal, they're ten years too late, even for the Toonami crowd. If this makes any money, i'll be fucking shocked.
The good points: one bout of high speed punching, and Bulma kept her surname. And wore tight clothes.
For context, i cried at Speed Racer. I fucking love that movie, and i'll readily admit that is has many flaws (Spritle being the source of most of them). DB:Evolution isn't even as good as the few scenes i regretfully gave a look in Air Master.
Eff to the Ayll.
Besides the fact that Goku's played by a white guy, is in highschool, and basically starts at the beginning of the story as the "nice guy who gets picked on by the jocks," besides the fact that Piccolo wears an all leather bodysuit a la Trinity, besides the fact that ERNIE FUCKING HUDSON plays a grandmaster monk/priest at some sacred temple, besides the fact that Yamucha doesn't wear a speck of red and has a valley-boy "dude" accent (oh and is BLONDE, despite being played by an asian actor), besides the fact that it bears repeating that GOKU IS PLAYED BY A WHITE GUY, this movie was just so much tripe. Poorly acted, poorly directed, the CG effects were only ok, and it had a crappy title screen ending (the new replacement for the classic B-grade action movie freeze frame). The fight scenes weren't anything to write about or even speak of; i don't know why they bothered to make this.
If they were trying to cash in on Dragonball's fame and fan appeal, they're ten years too late, even for the Toonami crowd. If this makes any money, i'll be fucking shocked.
The good points: one bout of high speed punching, and Bulma kept her surname. And wore tight clothes.
For context, i cried at Speed Racer. I fucking love that movie, and i'll readily admit that is has many flaws (Spritle being the source of most of them). DB:Evolution isn't even as good as the few scenes i regretfully gave a look in Air Master.
Eff to the Ayll.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
theinsomniac:
According to IMDB the actress' name is Miracle Laurie. How perfect is that? The kicker is that "Dollhouse" is only her second credit EVER, she was on one episode of "Medical Investigators"s. That's it!
theinsomniac:
They expected it to be as good as they remember Buffy to be, and they expected it to reach those heights from the first episode. Anything less was unacceptable.