Hey everybody, i'm really broke, but i just couldn't stay away.
Some things that have been going on:
I got fired from a job i hated. I'm still looking for work, of course. The freelance is moving very slowly. I really hope they pick up soon, but i'm not relying on it. All kinds of interesting other freelance type things have come up in the... Read More
I'm sorry you're having to miss your family. Sometimes being lonely, but not alone, can be a great time to work on things you want to change about yourself, which it seems like you're in the process of doing. I think it's great that you have such a supportive and intelligent wife. It's a shame your wider community can't be more open-minded.
I think I know some of what you might be feeling. I love my body, and there's nothing specific I would want to change about it, but I identify with men more often than women, and there are times when I feel a desire for a more masculine body. The things that please me the most about my body are the typically masculine things about it- the muscles in my arms and the shape of my calves and thighs, which are bulkier than most women. The women I admire the most, physically, are those with athletic, androgynous frames. When I'm attracted to someone, I will often feel it as a desire to penetrate, although I seldom wish for a penis.
I remember talking with a friend once who said he thought 'both' was the dirtiest word in the English language, referring to our society's hatred of any ambiguity or androgyny. Although I didn't agree with him, there is certainly a special type of hatred for those who are sexually ambiguous.
It's great that you have a friend who can sew. Your last blog made me wish I lived closer, since I trained as a tailor when I was younger. I don't sew much anymore, except burlesque costumes, but the challenge of making a masculine body look natural in feminine clothes is a pretty exciting idea.
Not a whole lot to say lately. Been working a lot, and i'm about to be working a lot more, hopefully. Lots of fun things planned for summer, gonna be making some clothes, and destroying some others in the process.
You know something i noticed the other day?
I was thinking about how we don't have as many black -fill in the professional position here-, and i thought about our history as black people in this country.
I thought to myself, "how is it that we don't do as well as anyone else?" We're obviously capable.
T had mentioned in another online venue how black... Read More
I posted this over on the site where I found my previous dickhead client. I posted it for two reasons: one, because he posted over there again looking for a new animator. Two, because there was another job posting by someone else who was looking for "traditional anime style."
Ok, I've seen posts in the job forums saying that they are looking for art or... Read More
I'm slowly coming to grips with the fact that the people I knew, who I tried to reconnect with on facebook, are not on the same page as me in numerous ways. I've found in the last few months that they are paranoid, racist, homophobic, and numerous other detestable things.
Not coincidentally these same people call themselves Christians.
That's especially sad when you consider the main messages of Jesus. Christianity is a great outlet for some people to be giving, charitable, self-loving, etc, but too many people use it as a justification for their hatred.
