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thisfire

Canada

Member Since 2005

Followers 12 Following 65

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Wednesday Sep 06, 2006

Sep 6, 2006
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Cats 'n Kittens,

I figured the digital world needs to know more random facts about my fine self. And so-o-o-o-o-o...

Running through my head at any given time...

a) The Oscar Meyer weiner song (I wish I were an Oscat Meyer weiner etc. etc.)

b) Why are biblical figures always depicted as white? The vast majority were supposed to be (especially Jesus) from the middle east. Shouldn't they be middle eastern? Instead, Jesus looks like that ugly dude from Nickleback.

c) How does sexual confusion work? I've never been attracted to men, and have always been attracted to women. How do you get confused?

d) Why is Big D & The Kids Table the only good ska band left? And why don't I know anyone who wants to start a ska band with me?

e) What the hell is "Post Hardcore" and "Post Punk?" "Post" refers to after. What?

f) Why haven't we evolved out of ass hair? I can't figure out one practical use for ass hair. Never once have I said to myself "Man, that would've sucked if I didn't have a patch of course hair surrounding my anus." Your welcome for that image.

g) Why don't I have a girlfriend? I'm nice, interesting (so I'm told) and reasonably attractive (or at least not freakishly ugly. Y'know, like circus ugly), so why are women never attracted to me? Huh.

h) I need a tattoo. What should I get tattooed on myself? Also, my nipples are boring, I think they need some piercing. Get off your ass and get your nipples pierced!!! And then get a tattoo. Chump.

i) Why does Church music always sound so evil? Shouldn't it be nice and poppy and fluffy, not epic and evil?


Two random facts:

1) The sound of children singing horrifies me on a deep, most fundamental level. I actually shudder when I hear that off pitch screeching.

2) One time I took off my pants, and my scrotum had swelled up to the size of a softball and a half, and was numb. I've never got such good service in an emergeny room in my life. Seriously, I was in and out in half an hour. Turned out a bug got into my pants and bit my scrotum, and it swelled up. I did, however, get an Ultrasound on my scrotum by a middle aged Asian man. That wasn't awkward.

A'yuh,

J.R.

P.S. I really have to stop making jokes about Jesus. I do it all the time, and now I keep offending people with Jesus jokes. It's just so much fun!
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
havok:
haha.. awww I was looking pretty sleepy.. I got out of the car and just about fell over because my legs were all weak.
Sep 7, 2006
rubyfoo:
It is true that as you get older there are so many more things that get in the way of passion, work, finances, family, etc....i do hope you find passion, it's a wonderful thing.... smile

a catchy song

b yes they should have more of an olive skin, typical of the catholic church

c sexual confusion happens alot, when that line between (in your case) he is so cool, we have so much fun together, i love him, is that as a friend or more?? this line starts to blur

d ska - go start a band now, go on, do it!!

e i guess they are referring to "the sex pistols" era, now we are in a time after that. But punk never died and went away??

f no comment - think anal bleaching....

g girls are probably often attracted to you, right time, wrong place or some such. No you are not ugly, or circus ugly....LOL...i like carni's....

h what sort of tattoo would you like, have you got any already?
i i like church music, itso cool, i like the eerieness....

you are a little strange, hmmmm, talk later....
shocked
Sep 8, 2006

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