Things have felt great between us. We talk like we used to. Something isn't right though and I know it's my fault. I had a moment of weakness a few months ago and I told you I cared a little more than I should. I told you I need to find a girlfriend to keep my mind off you because I'm friends with you and your fiance. I've been friends with your fiance longer, but when we became friends something just clicked and we get along wonderfully as friends.
Before I broke down you were comfortable with giving me hugs and being somewhat close to me, but now I can barely get a hug goodbye or acknowledgement from you when you guys get ready to leave. I know I fucked up. I regret it everyday. I just wish everything could be ok. You know I'd never cross any lines.It just hurts me that I made you feel uncomfortable. I can never say sorry enough. I understand why you don't hug me as much. It's just tough especially when I see you cry and I can't do what comes naturally to me. I'm a hugger at heart. Just wish I could turn back and keep all my feelings and thoughts to myself.
Now I have to act like everything is alright when inside I'm breaking down everytime you walk right past me.
You're my best friend.
I apologize for this rant but this is one of the only places I have to talk about it. My emotions are so much stronger than they used to be. I don't know what's going on inside my head. :/
