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surlyclown

Member Since 2004

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Thursday Nov 30, 2006

Nov 30, 2006
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Today's post brought to you for no discernable reason in the style of Paul Harvey.

Hello SG'ers...this is Surly. And this is the rest of the story for the last month... news you might have missed.

Thanksgiving. A time for gathering family, children, perhaps even the pets of those children. Dogs. God, spelled backwards if you will--with an 'S'. And if those two dogs have never met before and you allow four hyper pie-filled children to ramp up their canine endorphins to hysterical levels, you have what's known in farm parliance as a 'dog fight.' And so, outside, snarling ensues, children cry and the adult table rushes to rectify this potential tragedy in the making. My first inclination was to go outside and physically assault everything--beast or child-- to regain order. Cooler heads intervened. The boxscore: One cousin bitten on the hand breaking up the fight, one dog with a slightly torn ear, one cousin covered in dog blood. And with all that... I went for seconds.

Borat. I went with my lady-faire to see this controversial motion picture on a quiet Thursday afternoon. The woman in line ahead of us was curvy, tattoo'd, and pinup gorgeous in leopard print heels. Her date was a tall ginger-topped gentleman in black denim. And so, my lady-faire and I shared the hysterical laughter that can only be provided by watching fat, hairy ethnic types chase each other naked around swanky hotels waving rubber fists--with Brody Dalle and Josh Homme. SG royalty.

And speaking of royalty, if your throne should ever break, the good folks at True Value Hardware will help you with all your home repairs. That's True Value Hardware. Ask for it by name.

Page two...

Leaving the top luau show in Kauai, I overheard the following conversation between a fair-haired pixie of about five and her mother:

The Girl: What's Pele? (Referring to the ancient Polynesian Goddess of fire mentioned in the show.)
Her Mother: It's a made up story. You know, just for fun.
Me (perhaps too loud): Yeah, you know. Like Jesus.

And now you know... the rest of the story.
EL SUICIDO LOCO
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
rendo:
I dig that paul harvey.
Dec 2, 2006
trixel:
We need to post something in spookshow. I think it's approaching that point where it gets deleted. I've been thinking about a suitable topic with very little success.
Dec 3, 2006

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