stella_marie

well, this was quite a weekend. friday night was rybears birthday and i already updated about that. i made an appointment to get my hair cut on saturday afternoon. i was just going to get a trim. the funny thing about a haircut is that it can make you feel like a brand new person. so in the spirit of starting anew, well, i just chopped my hair off. i think its more liberating than burning your bra well, me with no bra is just painful.

after the cut, i went to soho to get my dads gift at the apple store. i knew where i was going, knew what i was getting, should take no time at all, right?? i hate that fucking area on a saturday afternoon. pedestrians should have to get a license to walk in new york. you just follow the same rules. for example, when you are driving, you dont just stop in the middle of the street, do you? no, you pull over and stop so others can get past you. the sidewalk is not a one way street. i understand that the five of you are shopping together, but when you all walk next to each other, well, where is everybody else going to walk?? i digress. so im walking and who do i see eric balfour.



ive loved him ever since he was gabe in six feet under. hes yummy. i get so excited anytime i see him on tv or in a movie, so seeing him on the street, well, i think i might have turned red. you know how they say your life flashes before you in the moment before you die? well, this was just like it, except nobody was dying. i thought i should say something, but what would i say? a million things flashed through my head in those few seconds and as we were about to pass, the only thing my brain focused on is that ive thought of him while masturbating. i think that was a good choice to pass the moment in silence and just smile after. god, is he fucking hot.

so i went to meet my friend jess after who was bartending during the day and bored. the place was pretty empty so i sat at the bar and she poured me a beer. so then i notice this really good looking guy at the end of the bar. we were both checking each other out, but, well, nothing more than that. so jess is ready to leave work and i decide fuck it, ill say something. i went over to him and introduced myself and he did the same. i said, well, i just wanted to tell you that i think youre really cute. yeah, he did look a little surprised. he told me nobody ever just went up to him and said that. i said if it makes you feel any better, ive never gone up to anybody and said that. we talked for a bit and jess was ready to go so i had to quickly wrap things up. he said he was glad i came over and said something. i told him ill be there again wednesday night keeping jess company and he said he would make a point of it to be in wednesday night. in all honesty, i dont even know how much it matters if he shows up or not. the point is, how many times have we kicked ourselves just wishing we had said something? well, this is one less time i have to kick myself. actually, it was a rush of adrenaline. the only bad thing was i was so focused on what i was going to say right after i introduced myself that i forgot to listen when he reciprocated and now i dont know his fucking name.