I'm not understanding this trend of people being complete and utter twats to each other online. This site never used to have much of that, but a few bad apples spoil the whole bunch, I guess.
I know those specific people are talking shit about me. It's not like I can't see it, but one is a bitter person and the other is a pathological liar and people who know what this is about probably can pick out who is who. And that's all I'm saying about that situation because I'm not lowering myself to their standards, nor am I tagging them.
I'm still smiling and happy to be part of this community. Others may mistake my honesty and bluntness for bitchiness, but the ones who do so seem to have poor attitudes already.
This site, like life, is what you make of it. Let me give you an example. I was in constant pain my whole life, and never knew why. I was having dislocations or partial dislocations of joints all the time. I was tested for everything from Lupus to Lyme Disease to anything else "easy" doctors could think of. After I left my hometown in Rhode Island to get married to the love of my life, @trevor, and moved to Colorado, where he was stationed in the army at the time (we had met here on SG, and we used to have little Burlesque Shows in Boston back in the day, I was one of the dancers, and he came to the pre-show dinner and the show), I was still clueless as to what was going on with my body. I finally got up the nerve to go to a doctor on the army base, and the first guy was a complete dick, so I asked to be transferred to a female physician because I couldn't imagine Dr. Asshole giving me my lady parts exams, plus I am a sexual assault and rape survivor, so having a doctor like that in that area, I just couldn't. Anyhow, I was shocked to see that the new doctor was actually listening to me. Something I've never had before. Not even as a kid. I was diagnosed, tentatively, with Fibromyalgia, but even she didn't take that as an answer. I finally went to a specialist, and was diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome types 3 and 4, which can be fatal. After my husband was out of the army, we went to find a doctor who would take care of my EDS. For 6 years, I was miserable with this doctor who didn't even really know what EDS was. She kept giving me basically, aspirin, and if I needed anything stronger, I was either shit out of luck or given 5 to 10 tramadol or once in awhile, norco per month. Anyhow, my doctor literally asked me not to be her patient anymore because I couldn't do the things she wanted me to do for my pain (physical therapy doesn't help EDS if it has been caught as late as it was in me).
Anyway, her "dumping" me as a patient is probably the best thing that ever happened to me! I found a doctor who knew and treated EDS in the past, she assigned me a pain specialist, who decided I was on the right path with her as my doctor. She has a whole team of university students and doctors who are actually on top of my "medical case" and researching EDS and keeping on top of the latest treatments for me and her other EDS patients.
So why this story and what does it have to do with SG's community? During those years where I had no diagnosis, I was depressed all the time, I didn't want to make an effort in life in general. I stayed locked in my tiny studio apartment in Boston alone most of the time. I was miserable (and I'm sure you'd even see it here on SG if you could go back that far in my blogs). Getting a diagnosis helped somewhat, and the doctors at the army base gave me some of what I needed to feel better, but that other doctor I had for 6 years after that, put me back in that hole. I even had a friend who was a medic in the army on the same base giving me IV bags with mild pain meds when I was really bad off. It's not something I'd recommend doing, but I was desperate, and she could see the agony in my eyes. I seriously wanted to die. I hated every moment I was alive. I couldn't walk sometimes, I couldn't even get out of bed most of the time. When I was finally treated properly, both mentally and physically, my attitude toward life changed for the positive.
I stopped feeling sorry for myself, and started helping other people with the same illness. In fact, a good portion of my followers on instagram contact me to tell me I've been helping them. That alone makes me incredibly happy. This means I do have a purpose in my life, and even though some days are worse than others, and sometimes I need to sleep all day after a big event, but I still do my best to have a smile on my face and to be a positive person.
It's just like this community. Bad things might happen, people might not like you because you stand up for what you believe in. There's always going to be jerks around, but they're like my EDS, they can be treated by ignoring them (well, my EDS can hurt less if I am occupied and not focused 100% on the pain), by standing up for yourself (just like taking my medication), and being a generally nice human being (like how I help other people with EDS and other chronic pain conditions just by keeping positive and posting about my struggles and life and how I take them without getting down about them all the time). I may need to take a day or two to recover from my legs not working, I may need crutches to help me get around sometimes, but I take them as minor setbacks, like not having a set bought on here for awhile.
But being an awful person to others who just want to help you or guide you is no way to take part in any community at all. These are the people who ruin it for everyone else. Just like my negativity and feeling sorry for myself and my illness and wanting to just give up instead of stay as healthy for as long as I can and enjoy life for as long as I can, one person's bad attitude can forge an "us vs them" feeling on this site. That's not what SG is about at all! We are about joining together as a place to celebrate alternative beauty whether it's in the mind or physical form.
I guess what I'm saying is: Keep calm and enjoy the tits and ass:
And there, have a preview of my next set, shot by @milloux, coming out into Member Review in 2 months and 2 weeks (as of now)
❤️s & 💀s,
x0x0,
☠️Sid☠️
P.S. If you stay and be positive, even through the bad times, you will be rewarded one day. It may take "forever", but there's always hope that things can start looking up, but you have to make your own destiny. If you're just going to be a miserable human being, you will only get the same feeling from others in return. There are enough assholes around the world. Take charge and make someone smile because the good deed you've done for that person should be a big enough award for you.
