How to Honor Your Deceased Mother
Mother's Day can be a sad time for those of us whose mothers are no longer living. There are many ways to honor a deceased mother on Mother's Day, though, and to keep her memory alive within your family and the circle of friends who also loved her.
Talk about your mother with people who remember her ' go...
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Mother's Day can be a sad time for those of us whose mothers are no longer living. There are many ways to honor a deceased mother on Mother's Day, though, and to keep her memory alive within your family and the circle of friends who also loved her.
Talk about your mother with people who remember her ' go...
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I was watching the TVLand awards and they did a tribute to Don Rickles - which got me into a debate with my hubbie over the arrt of the insult. I lamented that insults these days lacked the "dignity" and "class" that was inherent in earlier times....
When Insults Had Class
These glorious insults are from an era when cleverness with words was still valued,...
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VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
wsoxfan:
I remember you mentioning Sam Levenson in one of your previous blogs. I also remember how that blew me away. I mention this because when talking about comedy, not just "insult" comedy, People today don't have the benefit of the comedic "storytellers" of yesteryear, such as Levenson and Myron Cohen. They knew how to make people smile and laugh without resorting to the "f" word every two seconds.
cassy:
hey what's up girl did you get my message?
looking to catch up hope alls well in your neck of the woods mamacita
looking to catch up hope alls well in your neck of the woods mamacita
Happiness Myth No. 4: Youll Be Happier If You Insist on The Best.
Maybe not. As Barry Schwartz explains in his fascinating book, The Paradox of Choice, there are two types of decision makers. Satisficers (yes, satisficers) make a decision once their criteria are met; when they find the hotel or the pasta sauce that has the qualities they want, theyre satisfied. Maximizers want to...
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Maybe not. As Barry Schwartz explains in his fascinating book, The Paradox of Choice, there are two types of decision makers. Satisficers (yes, satisficers) make a decision once their criteria are met; when they find the hotel or the pasta sauce that has the qualities they want, theyre satisfied. Maximizers want to...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
ninxy:
Was way Over. Body slammed rather harshly by time, age, society and of course money, in no particular order. Now I'm a semi-under. Soon to be a nothing.
grayb:
I'm an S OB
I haven't been able to get out for the past few days. Once I did, where did I go? Costco.
I haven't been able to get out for the past few days. Once I did, where did I go? Costco.
Theres a magnet on my fridge - given to me by my Mom before she died. Its a quote from Thoreau. It says:
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life youve imagined.
Now ordinarily i tend to sort of gloss over the grandiose inspirational quotes, cause theres only so much fluff a person can handle in the oft-times harsh reality of...
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Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life youve imagined.
Now ordinarily i tend to sort of gloss over the grandiose inspirational quotes, cause theres only so much fluff a person can handle in the oft-times harsh reality of...
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VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
grayb:
The birds are fed, I'm feeling considerably better and the dustrhinos are thriving.
The sun is shining - and unlike yesterday, there are no clouds to obscure it.
I'm planning on having a great day - hope that you do too...
The sun is shining - and unlike yesterday, there are no clouds to obscure it.
I'm planning on having a great day - hope that you do too...
wsoxfan:
Thank you.
"Surely every one realizes, at some point along the way, that he is capable of living a far better life than the one he has chosen."
-- Henry Miller,
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
liathach:
Perhaps living your life with integrity is the key to happiness. Or one of them anyway. I think that was partly implicit in Cassy' statement, regarding relationships with loved ones. I also think anyone with integrity is always self-critical, although it's only a valid exercise if you think you can improve on your current state.
To be honest, although the statement is probably taken out of context, I do find it mildly annoying. I think my response to Miller would be 'Yeah? So what?'. Because the realization alone achieves nothing at all, apart from making you feel miserable! Besides, being 'capable' is the key to the statement. We can all imagine some heroic alternative to our own lives, but whether we were ever capable of forging that alternative is highly unlikely.
If my limit is being moderately engaging, being part of a happy family, having an enquiring mind, strong political views, and attending the odd anti-war demo, I can live with that. In fact, I'm NOT capable of anything better!
To be honest, although the statement is probably taken out of context, I do find it mildly annoying. I think my response to Miller would be 'Yeah? So what?'. Because the realization alone achieves nothing at all, apart from making you feel miserable! Besides, being 'capable' is the key to the statement. We can all imagine some heroic alternative to our own lives, but whether we were ever capable of forging that alternative is highly unlikely.
If my limit is being moderately engaging, being part of a happy family, having an enquiring mind, strong political views, and attending the odd anti-war demo, I can live with that. In fact, I'm NOT capable of anything better!
mrsted_stryker:
I am just happy to now be able to LIVE life! I am getting back to me.. and that feels amazing.
I miss ya tho.. not being on here as much an all....
I miss ya tho.. not being on here as much an all....
The Plan
In the beginning was the PLAN.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the workers.
And they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of Shit, and it Stinketh."
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said "It is a pail of dung, and...
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In the beginning was the PLAN.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the workers.
And they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of Shit, and it Stinketh."
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said "It is a pail of dung, and...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
wsoxfan:
This is known as "business as usual, and screw anyone who doesn't like it".
kas:
heh , minus the dumpster
of course... tHANKS
of course... tHANKS
Recently I was accused of being spoiled. Now personally, given my life experiences and achievements (all earned through hard work) - I was a surprised that anyone who could characterize me as spoiled. (Especially, knowing the backgound of the accuser who's the biggest "attention whore/drama queen/whiner" ever.)
So I intrepidly sought out a test to validate my claim that I'm not "spoiled". A little "fermented"...
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So I intrepidly sought out a test to validate my claim that I'm not "spoiled". A little "fermented"...
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VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
lil_em:
I scored 17 BTW, interesting! xx
lil_em:
I'm having a sad day today but it's ok, it's allowed.
I'm trying hard to look after myself and treat myself well with good, healthy food and exercise. The best way I can help me is by helping others. I am rich in a lot of ways, compared to a lot of other ignorant fuckers, on this site as well as off of it!! Hehe
xx
I'm trying hard to look after myself and treat myself well with good, healthy food and exercise. The best way I can help me is by helping others. I am rich in a lot of ways, compared to a lot of other ignorant fuckers, on this site as well as off of it!! Hehe
xx
I found myself a new doctor - and I'm loving him already!
Here's his advice on nutrition -
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying...
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Here's his advice on nutrition -
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying...
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VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
liathach:
You know, we have no freesias at all in ours, and I love them too. I must remedy that when I finally plant out the main border this year. Their scent is gorgeous! But we have some great roses, and the lavender by the front door always smells divine when you brush past it.
grayb:
Well, I'm supposed to be on in the car and out of here by now, but I just wanted to stop by to quickly and briefly respond...
No one becomes as wise and fillled with wisdom as you without having a had varied, interesting and not-always-easy journey along the way. Thanks for being the wonderful person that you are.
I'll be back later... Take care
No one becomes as wise and fillled with wisdom as you without having a had varied, interesting and not-always-easy journey along the way. Thanks for being the wonderful person that you are.
I'll be back later... Take care
I enjoy reading the ponderings of some of the characters on this site - some of it I find moving like the prose of Caryn, some of it haunting like Ninxy, some of it upliftingly realistic like Gyllien, flirty like Sinful Sara, constancy like Cassy, loving like Junnie, artful like Rowe, thoughtful like Lilli, logical like HeathenUK, humorous like Caffeine Monkey, caring like Aniccata. I...
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VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
caryn:
Firstly, Quella, posing nude is a real job. Selling one's work is selling one's work, whatever that work might be...honey...
Secondly...
What a provocative blog! For me, the most resonant assertion was about responsibility and choices. If I choose not to "make a scene" with my g/f's mother, it is not my g/f's fault, nor her mother's; to them goes the prejudice, and the injury of the mother to her child, but to me goes the frustration of the choice made---I love my g/f, and forcing the issue of what we are (queer for each other) is important to me. But fear---almost certainly justified fear---of alienation drives my g/f to argue against being honest. What cost my personal honesty with her mother; what cost to us of "playing pretend"?
An intricate knot, but one I chose to help tie. Which doesn't prevent me on a bad day---or if I'm torqued with my g/f or her mother, or my partner, or my daughters, or The Moon---swearing I'm going to end "this idiot's charade". But doing so unilaterally would be supremely selfish. She desperately wants to be a happy housewife, but has the hard luck to be queer. So I stay silent, by my own active choice.
And that, I feel, is key---that I[/] understand the compromises made, and why I made them, and what they cost me. Because the alternative is poison---the blaming of others' for choices I made. That is not to say that others' have no share---that would be an absurdity---only that the choice was mine: as Sherrillee has written, I made those first steps by choice, so that in all that comes after, of the good and the bad equally, I am a participant. The hurt at being denied is balanced---for me---with the joy of 26+ years of love.
Secondly...
What a provocative blog! For me, the most resonant assertion was about responsibility and choices. If I choose not to "make a scene" with my g/f's mother, it is not my g/f's fault, nor her mother's; to them goes the prejudice, and the injury of the mother to her child, but to me goes the frustration of the choice made---I love my g/f, and forcing the issue of what we are (queer for each other) is important to me. But fear---almost certainly justified fear---of alienation drives my g/f to argue against being honest. What cost my personal honesty with her mother; what cost to us of "playing pretend"?
An intricate knot, but one I chose to help tie. Which doesn't prevent me on a bad day---or if I'm torqued with my g/f or her mother, or my partner, or my daughters, or The Moon---swearing I'm going to end "this idiot's charade". But doing so unilaterally would be supremely selfish. She desperately wants to be a happy housewife, but has the hard luck to be queer. So I stay silent, by my own active choice.
And that, I feel, is key---that I[/] understand the compromises made, and why I made them, and what they cost me. Because the alternative is poison---the blaming of others' for choices I made. That is not to say that others' have no share---that would be an absurdity---only that the choice was mine: as Sherrillee has written, I made those first steps by choice, so that in all that comes after, of the good and the bad equally, I am a participant. The hurt at being denied is balanced---for me---with the joy of 26+ years of love.
grayb:
Just because I haven't mentioned it lately, doesn't mean that I haven't been concerned...
I hope that all is well
I hope that all is well
Want to know what your dating persona is? Check out this link and take the test.
http://www.okcupid.com/the-dating-persona-test
I'm The Maid of Honor
Deliberate Gentle Love Master (DGLM)
Appreciated for your kindness and envied for all your experience, you are The Maid of Honor.
Charismatic, affectionate, and terrific in relationships, you are what many guys would call a perfect catchand you probably have many admirers, each...
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http://www.okcupid.com/the-dating-persona-test
I'm The Maid of Honor
Deliberate Gentle Love Master (DGLM)
Appreciated for your kindness and envied for all your experience, you are The Maid of Honor.
Charismatic, affectionate, and terrific in relationships, you are what many guys would call a perfect catchand you probably have many admirers, each...
Read More
VIEW 27 of 27 COMMENTS
cassy:
i have those silly fireworks everytime i talk to him, they just go off inside my heart.
i NEED the other kinda fireworks too the physical metaphysical ones from the amazing experience together in the same space.....but i'm a believer that all in good time, and the time is getting closer
i NEED the other kinda fireworks too the physical metaphysical ones from the amazing experience together in the same space.....but i'm a believer that all in good time, and the time is getting closer
caryn:
Solid points on conventional-model polygamy. I do believe, though, that the key in the case of that model is the conventional bit. Much the same reaction happens to women from any place where the dominant culture is a virulent patriarchy---the Indian sub-continent, the Near and Middle East, Central and Southern Africa, and large parts of China (and some would argue major parts of Japan and Indonesia).
I am loathe to use the term polyamoury any more, because polyamoury is now largely associated with swinging or with sexual promiscuity, neither of which describes sexually and emotionally intimate relationships among more than two people. Polygamy is deeply embedded in the idea of male supremacy, which is implicit in conventional heterosexual marriage, and so is even worse as a choice. And the degree of emotional involvement I intend surpasses the idea of "friends with benefits".
Come at from another direction---my personal belief is that humans are not monogamous---even if one abuses the definition of monogamy to countenance "serial monogamy"---and just as much pain, of exactly the same kind, derives from the attempt to force-fit human relationships into that model as derives from attempts to force that model to fit any more complex human relationships.
To make a multiple-partner relationship work requires the same work that making a two-partner relationship work. The forces acting on a multiple-partner relationship are no different than those acting on a two-partner one, and each approach gains certain strengths, and incurs certain weaknesses, from the ways they confront those forces. Jealousy does not disappear from multiple-partner relationships merely because the basis of the relationship is X number of people. Fidelity---and I loathe that concept as it applies to marriages or similar long-term sexually and emotionally intimate relationships---is not guaranteed merely because a promise has been given.
LOL...I suppose I'd best write my own blog on the matter, instead of eating up space on yours! Sorry about that.
I am loathe to use the term polyamoury any more, because polyamoury is now largely associated with swinging or with sexual promiscuity, neither of which describes sexually and emotionally intimate relationships among more than two people. Polygamy is deeply embedded in the idea of male supremacy, which is implicit in conventional heterosexual marriage, and so is even worse as a choice. And the degree of emotional involvement I intend surpasses the idea of "friends with benefits".
Come at from another direction---my personal belief is that humans are not monogamous---even if one abuses the definition of monogamy to countenance "serial monogamy"---and just as much pain, of exactly the same kind, derives from the attempt to force-fit human relationships into that model as derives from attempts to force that model to fit any more complex human relationships.
To make a multiple-partner relationship work requires the same work that making a two-partner relationship work. The forces acting on a multiple-partner relationship are no different than those acting on a two-partner one, and each approach gains certain strengths, and incurs certain weaknesses, from the ways they confront those forces. Jealousy does not disappear from multiple-partner relationships merely because the basis of the relationship is X number of people. Fidelity---and I loathe that concept as it applies to marriages or similar long-term sexually and emotionally intimate relationships---is not guaranteed merely because a promise has been given.
LOL...I suppose I'd best write my own blog on the matter, instead of eating up space on yours! Sorry about that.
sorry for your loss...