I think I need to reevaluate my life. Everything. My job, friends (or lack thereof), girlfriend (or lack thereof), apartment, hangouts, lifestyle, spending habits, how I interact with people.
As far as job goes, it's pretty good. Pay is good and it's easy. Going kind of crazy though, because I don't interact with many people at work. That combined with coming home to nothing/nobody is driving me crazy. I find that I'm talking to myself more and more, especially in public. I start a new position in January, so maybe that'll take care of itself.
As for friends, I don't know how to approach this. I have problems talking to people because I always hear people talk about stupid things that nobody wants to hear. I'm always afraid of being that person that doesn't know when to shut up. I usually end up shunning people away for whatever reason. For the most part I don't like guys. Always trying to outdo others. I prefer women for friends, but it's hard to talk to a woman without her thinking your interested. Plus it's hard to get a woman to talk to you if she isn't interested.
Girlfriend, ugh. Such an ugly situation. I think I've become "the other guy". I brought flowers to Ann yesterday when we tried to meet for lunch. Well she took them and did the whole "Oh you didn't have to" thing. Then she put them in her car saying that she had to be secretive around work. Why? She works in an office with like 4 other women. Wouldn't most women take their flowers in and show them off? I'm guessing it's because I'm the other guy. I've never met her parents. I've only met a few of her friends. Haven't met her coworkers. The fact that she's not much of a responsible person makes it really hard for me to tell when she's avoiding me or if she's just being her irresponsible self.
Apartment. It's a small 1 bedroom, but nothing special. I could easily move up to a 2 bedroom in a "luxury" place. I could also look for a roommate that way I won't go totally crazy without human interaction. So I have 3 options. 1) Stay. Save money. Buy more things. 2) Move to a nicer place. Buy not so many more things. 3) Move to a nicer place. Get a roommate. Save some money.
Hangouts. Right now I just go to corporate bars. Pretty much Ruby Tuesdays and Outback. Been going long enough I get taken care of. Mostly older guys or couples that are regulars. Great people, but none my age or that I can really relate to. Sometimes I'm afraid I'll become one of those 50 year-old single guys. Clubs and real bars don't do it for me really. Then there's the fact that I'm always alone. Not going to meet too many people without being overly outgoing.
Every week has become the same. Work. Come home. Maybe go to Rubys. Come home. Repeat. Every day. I need to do things, but it's weird to do everything alone. Sometimes I go to a Wizards or Capitals game, or a movie, but it's alone.
Lately I've been on a spending spree. I guess I'm covered in the electronics area. New TV and home theater. Just bought a Xbox 360. No more buying things. I guess I need a real couch instead of this futon I've had for 6 years. I should quit eating out and start cooking at home. Right now I'm cooking a turkey I just bought for 87 cents. That's a good start. Right?
Now I just need to act.
As far as job goes, it's pretty good. Pay is good and it's easy. Going kind of crazy though, because I don't interact with many people at work. That combined with coming home to nothing/nobody is driving me crazy. I find that I'm talking to myself more and more, especially in public. I start a new position in January, so maybe that'll take care of itself.
As for friends, I don't know how to approach this. I have problems talking to people because I always hear people talk about stupid things that nobody wants to hear. I'm always afraid of being that person that doesn't know when to shut up. I usually end up shunning people away for whatever reason. For the most part I don't like guys. Always trying to outdo others. I prefer women for friends, but it's hard to talk to a woman without her thinking your interested. Plus it's hard to get a woman to talk to you if she isn't interested.
Girlfriend, ugh. Such an ugly situation. I think I've become "the other guy". I brought flowers to Ann yesterday when we tried to meet for lunch. Well she took them and did the whole "Oh you didn't have to" thing. Then she put them in her car saying that she had to be secretive around work. Why? She works in an office with like 4 other women. Wouldn't most women take their flowers in and show them off? I'm guessing it's because I'm the other guy. I've never met her parents. I've only met a few of her friends. Haven't met her coworkers. The fact that she's not much of a responsible person makes it really hard for me to tell when she's avoiding me or if she's just being her irresponsible self.
Apartment. It's a small 1 bedroom, but nothing special. I could easily move up to a 2 bedroom in a "luxury" place. I could also look for a roommate that way I won't go totally crazy without human interaction. So I have 3 options. 1) Stay. Save money. Buy more things. 2) Move to a nicer place. Buy not so many more things. 3) Move to a nicer place. Get a roommate. Save some money.
Hangouts. Right now I just go to corporate bars. Pretty much Ruby Tuesdays and Outback. Been going long enough I get taken care of. Mostly older guys or couples that are regulars. Great people, but none my age or that I can really relate to. Sometimes I'm afraid I'll become one of those 50 year-old single guys. Clubs and real bars don't do it for me really. Then there's the fact that I'm always alone. Not going to meet too many people without being overly outgoing.
Every week has become the same. Work. Come home. Maybe go to Rubys. Come home. Repeat. Every day. I need to do things, but it's weird to do everything alone. Sometimes I go to a Wizards or Capitals game, or a movie, but it's alone.
Lately I've been on a spending spree. I guess I'm covered in the electronics area. New TV and home theater. Just bought a Xbox 360. No more buying things. I guess I need a real couch instead of this futon I've had for 6 years. I should quit eating out and start cooking at home. Right now I'm cooking a turkey I just bought for 87 cents. That's a good start. Right?
Now I just need to act.