screaminglife

It's my birthday tomorrow, and on top of that, it's my fortieth. I'm feeling a little grumpy about this, in part because I think it's expected, but mostly because my birthdays tend to inspire some rumination on my part and a hell of a lot has happened over the past couple of years.

I don't feel 40. I completely changed my life and my headspace...
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And so, here I am: house sold, moved into a new place, by myself once more. I finally got my cat back yesterday after half a month of being in a state of transition between the house and new apartment, bookending a trip to San Francisco.

I feel good. Good without qualifications. It's been longer than I care to admit since I felt like I...
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In San Francisco for the first time this week. I'm here on business, so I fear that I'm not getting the best sense of what the city is. Not really any time to be a full-on tourist, either.

It's nice to get a break from the stress and drama back home, but I'm excited to get back. Have to pack for my move next week...
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I ended a 7-year relationship back in October, and have been dealing with the fallout since, including the sale of a house and trying to arrange a new place to live. I have a lot of feelings about this, but the short version is: it's difficult and frightening but it was the right thing to do and I've never doubted that in the months since....
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There's a documentary film I've been involved with over the past two years. It's about the significance of physical artifacts. I produce a spinoff podcast, on which I frequently give my cohosts grief about how important they think physical things are. I think stuff is largely overrated.

This afternoon, I'm going to write about the two objects that make me a hypocrite.

I was fourteen...
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We took a family vacation to the American southwest back when I was about 11 years old. I have a lot of fond memories of that trip, but on some level I'd always worried that my fondness for the region was coloured by nostalgia. Was I old enough to truly appreciate the beauty of the desert? Would it hold up if I ever came back?
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It's said that the only certainties in life are death and taxes. Change, though? That's a constant, too. Also entropy. The places and objects we value inevitably decay.

For nine years of my life, I attended a rural public school. It ceased to exist as the new millennium began, the victim of cutbacks and downsizing. I can't tell you what the building has been for...
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I have, for a couple of years now, found it increasing hard to find time to play guitar for pleasure. I only ever seem to play when I'm performing. If that sounds terrible or lame, it's because it is.

Aside from grabbing the acoustic for a few minutes here or there, I've also made an effort to start playing my electrics more. I love my...
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