salem13

bwaah...

i'm back now from amsterdam...hehe


it was so incredibly fun...i will have to tell you all more later bout the lovely adventures there..

but my bank account is laughin' at me..doh!

so i'll be workin' my ass off again....literally!

but aw...i so miss y'all at the chez paree
*waves*
i'll be back in next few days...for sure!

but hurtin' from stillettos...and workin' off my beer gut & hash munchie belly...from all the coffee shops!

but was oh so worth it

i'm lazy and have jet lag...

so forgive me...
talk to y'all soon...

tis good but strange to be back...!

if you're really bored and wanna read the epic journey home...
i'll repost...my journal from myspace..but tis uber long and pissy...

*mwah*

whoa!

i actually made it back this time...hehe

contrary to popular belief...that i'ld end up stayin' or runnin' away and prbly joinin' some eastern european circus...or who knows..hehe
with me..anything and everything seems to happen for some weird reason...
oh my!

but i made it back somehow...

i think i'm on some sort of terrorist list or on a racial/ political profiling or something
i know this sounds paranoid...but seriously!

the police like state & freedoms that have been taken away so fast from us
scare me at times
i mean here i am an american...comin' back into my country...yet i feel like a stranger in a strange land...bein' searched/ questioned all the time...tis truly sad...

who knows...why it is that i am always searched...
it could be racial...maybe i look to "exotic"...or "controversial" cause i'm not tan and blonde...or "american lookin"
or maybe it is cause i have been to many anti-war rallies/political protests...exercising my freedom of speech & assembly

fed the homeless (w/ groups like food not bombs)
majored in ancient middle eastern history...so have too many books on islamic history or the qu'ran...
turned down a government job w/ security/ defense (after seein' what my father went through in contracts, ethics, etc)
my mom is an active socialist/communist...constantly attackin' the administration...

who knows? but where we are suppose to be "free"
and i am an "american"
i should be allowed to speak, think, be whatever race, and be myself..
because we are a country of "freedom"...right?

i dunno...tis so truly weird...
i mean in the US...you sass the cops or security...they beat or arrest you...
over in amsterdam...it isn't quite that way...though i am sure there are probs as well...
but least...it doesn't seem as police state like...on the outside..
perhaps jeremy can explain it better...i don't quite know how..

sorry bout my diatribe rant!

every time i fly lately...i'm always gettin' interrogated or searched like 4 or 5 times before i can get on planes...and sometimes end up being the last one on...tis so embarassin' & surreal at the same time

the funny thing is that i look so "normal" now....

i can only imagine..how it'ld be if i still had shoulder length flamingo pink/purple hair, cat eye makeup, and 20 eyes...when i was uber deathrock/punk

oof!

leavin' amsterdam...i got pulled aside and questioned...then had to go through the metal machines twice...

arrivin' in the US at Newark..
at first they let me right through customs...
and i was like whoa...that's a first...

and just as i was smilin' and walkin' down the hall...

i see a security lady eyeball my boots & patch that says "destroy" w/ a chaos symbol on my backpack
and says "excuse me miss..."

and i think shit...here we go again....

havin' 20 min. to catch a shuttle, smoke, run to the otherside of the airport after a long flight...i do my best to be pleasant and smile to help the process..
i so don't want to miss another plane...

i get pulled aside to a room on the side...
asked a million questions...
where do you work? where do you go to school? what do you study? why were you there? what is your friend doin' there? how long? what books are you readin?

patted down twice

then they go through my bags
searchin' every pocket, cigarette case,
with dirty socks, clothes...all over the place...

somehow the mini bottle of absinthe seemed to elude them..
i wrapped it in a pair of socks..hehe

and the guard pulls out some black tulip bulbs
and looks at me funny...

what is this? "um...tulips...i sheepishly answer..." then start talkin' and smilin' and changin' the subject & ask him about himself..

he lets the bulbs through..phew..

which normally would get tossed..

and i made the plane...
yay!

a marchin' band from hs was on the flight...

fortunately...i drank and took some herbal relaxer pills and passed out..most of it...i had a whole row to myself and lied down like a mummy...hehe

now i'm back...

my phone messages are full
my pet rat died when i was gone
and i'm afraid to see my pile of bills/ bank account..hehe

but was definately so worth it!

and you only live once...
i'ld do it again in a heartbeat..

i so encourage everyone to travel
there is so much to be learned from it
and gives everything a new perspective..

*despite nazis airport security..hehe*

everyone needs wings...
and travel cures the restlessness that we find at times in the wilderness of ourselves...our at least tis a tonic for me...

thank you lovely jeremy
for bein' such a wonderful zookeeper with me

i haven't laugh so hard in so long..and was so very very nice
to get away...and wander the streets..buzzed...lookin' at canals..and laughin'...


~me