ryze

You know youre a junglist when:


You snicker when you hear someone say "PLUR"
You finally realize that phat pants are heavy and impractical
You blame candy kids for everything retarded in the scene
You have pretended to be rolling at a party just to get a quick laugh
out of your friends
When you ARE on E you do your best to act normal
You realize how cool Drum & Bass is
You realize how lame progressive trance is
You have close friends that don't give a fuck about raving
You think that maybe you don't give a fuck either
The smell of Vicks makes you physically ill
You can't help but laugh when someone tries to give you a "glow stick
show"
You learn to break
You want to actually roll, you have to eat about 4 pills at once
You can get those 4 pills for the same price that everyone else pays
for one
You drink beer after parties
You quit collecting fliers
You wouldn't mind if that kid with the whistle accidentally swallowed it
and died
You are actually called by your real name
You realize the general public shouldn't be blamed for hating raves
You talk shit as much as possible
You DESPISE happy hardcore
You DESPISE candy
You have seen a 13 year old "raver" on E, and almost left the party
because of it
You no longer feel the need to advertise your "rave-ness" to the world
You party sober and now understand how stupid you looked when you
didn't
You know who PRODUCED your favorite tracks, not just which DJ bought it and put it on a mix CD
You think that dancing like you're running in place has all the skill
and style of a penguin waddling with a stick up its ass
You have day-dreams that involve Tele-Tubbies and a large rusty
chainsaw
Your parents gave up on you ever becoming normal a long time ago
You know why GHB and K are for fucking idiots
You hate rave hoes
You begin to notice how often big DJs blow mixes
You think sweaty guys running around the party shirt-less should get
their asses kicked out
You act like a punk-ass bitch to security, police and any other
authority
You know that raving is all about the music, but RAVERS are not
You've 'accidentally' kicked people sitting in the middle of the dance
floor
You find the jungle room more appealing now
You can actually DANCE to jungle
You laugh out loud when you go to Jamba Juice and they're playing dance
music
You see guys from your high school football team at a party (refer to
aforementioned "sweaty guys without shirts"...)
You know raving is mainstream as fuck
The bigger the flier, the less you want to go
You can re-tell the story of how raving came to America quite
accurately
Your sleeping and eating habits are completely fucked up
You are amazed that you are somehow still alive
You can't remember the last time you went to a party and didn't think it
sucked
You can't remember much in general
You realize that ravers aren't nearly as genuine as hippies were