I want to rant, and bitch and whine.
But I have nothing to say. I don't know.
Last night I got in a weird fumble with this guy. I'm just trying to avoid it all. And I feel he's mad at me, cause I was just. weird. I wanted him to come over, said it, and he said yes, and then I was like no. I texted him today and oh no reply. It wasn't a fight or anything, just me being me. Nothing really. I'm avoiding the whole thing and I'm not gonna talk to him until he speaks to me.
I said I gave up on love, romance, the whole shebang and I mean it.
Been watching the Olympics. I deemed that I truly do love Apolo Ohno.... or rather OhYES! Yah lame. I know. I'm actually enjoying watching it all. I know I wont be able to watch the gymnastics portion when its in London. Feel like that's a bit of my life I failed to maybe accomplish.
I feel in love with an artist though. Greg "Craola" Simkins! I found his work sporting the cover of the Hi FRUCTOSE magazine and it literally grabbed my soul. I bought the magazine and I can't stop reading the article and staring at his work. What I wouldn't give to own one of his works or anything from him. Clothing, little toy.... Anything.
But most of all. the first thought that came to my mind, was a tattoo.
That's the crazy baby I want. I love it so. I'm worried about how it may translate through to a tattoo. I have no idea where I'd even put it but I'm gonna let this simmer in and see if it has lasting power. I think it does. But if it does, it will find a spot on my body without interfering with what I have.
This is odd though, cause I have never desired an artist design so much. Not that I'm putting aside my tokidoki brand designs. Just. That was because of how that changed my life. This hasn't really. Its something visually stimulating for me and right now that's not enough.
But none the less you should check him out.
IM SCARED
So I'm really only posting this to make sure I don't die. So to speak. I've become heavily disconnected from almost everything. I even ignore my facebook comments. I'm trying to work on that. I'm just turning into puddles of blah, moving through the world in my own little bubble. I'm just so not... pleased. I'm not happy, I'm not anything, except stuck in the existence of my own being. I'm at this point where I honestly believes no one cares and no one needs to. It hurts and I'm sure if my friends knew they might be hurt too. I don't even care. That worries me but I sorta don't care about that either. I don't think I'm depressed, more just severally bordering the bowl of it.
Toddles
But I have nothing to say. I don't know.
Last night I got in a weird fumble with this guy. I'm just trying to avoid it all. And I feel he's mad at me, cause I was just. weird. I wanted him to come over, said it, and he said yes, and then I was like no. I texted him today and oh no reply. It wasn't a fight or anything, just me being me. Nothing really. I'm avoiding the whole thing and I'm not gonna talk to him until he speaks to me.
I said I gave up on love, romance, the whole shebang and I mean it.
Been watching the Olympics. I deemed that I truly do love Apolo Ohno.... or rather OhYES! Yah lame. I know. I'm actually enjoying watching it all. I know I wont be able to watch the gymnastics portion when its in London. Feel like that's a bit of my life I failed to maybe accomplish.
I feel in love with an artist though. Greg "Craola" Simkins! I found his work sporting the cover of the Hi FRUCTOSE magazine and it literally grabbed my soul. I bought the magazine and I can't stop reading the article and staring at his work. What I wouldn't give to own one of his works or anything from him. Clothing, little toy.... Anything.
But most of all. the first thought that came to my mind, was a tattoo.
That's the crazy baby I want. I love it so. I'm worried about how it may translate through to a tattoo. I have no idea where I'd even put it but I'm gonna let this simmer in and see if it has lasting power. I think it does. But if it does, it will find a spot on my body without interfering with what I have.
This is odd though, cause I have never desired an artist design so much. Not that I'm putting aside my tokidoki brand designs. Just. That was because of how that changed my life. This hasn't really. Its something visually stimulating for me and right now that's not enough.
But none the less you should check him out.
IM SCARED
So I'm really only posting this to make sure I don't die. So to speak. I've become heavily disconnected from almost everything. I even ignore my facebook comments. I'm trying to work on that. I'm just turning into puddles of blah, moving through the world in my own little bubble. I'm just so not... pleased. I'm not happy, I'm not anything, except stuck in the existence of my own being. I'm at this point where I honestly believes no one cares and no one needs to. It hurts and I'm sure if my friends knew they might be hurt too. I don't even care. That worries me but I sorta don't care about that either. I don't think I'm depressed, more just severally bordering the bowl of it.
Toddles
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
kikibabe:
It could be the weather, chica. I've been feeling a bit down lately as well. We need spring!
curioustomcat:
If he decides also not to talk before you talk again that will be it... You should maybe go by the mood and not by principle. 